Setting Things Right
by tukct81
Summary: AU story where Elena gets a chance to travel back in time to Founder's Day to stop tragedy from striking everyone that she loves. What happens when Elena is in control and has all the answers?
1. Chapter 1

**I am changing a few things in the timeline of the show to suit my purposes. For example, I am leaving a lot more time between Katherine showing up and Elena coming home.**

1 year, 365 days. That's all it took for everything to change, and that's the time that the witches gave me back. They called it a gift for all that I'd done to set right the balance of nature, but I knew the truth. It was their guilt that compelled them to offer me this chance. They were the ones who set me on this path. Even in death the witches couldn't stomach so much innocent blood on their hands, so they sent me back to where it all began. Founder's Day, Mystic Falls.

I arrived on my kitchen floor with a thud and a groan. You would think with all the magic it took to get me here. The witches could see that I had a safe landing. As I stared up at the shocked faces of my doppelganger and my dearly departed father, my words caught in my throat. I never thought I would be so happy to see either. I leaped up and grabbed John into what was probably our first real hug since I was little. He seemed almost scared of me due to my rather dramatic appearance, but when he realized my intentions were not homicidal in nature, he relaxed. Katherine stood behind us looking perplexed. She seemed caught in the middle of a decision to either flee or kill us both. Before she decided on either, I broke my silence, "before you run off, you and I need to have a talk."

Never one to give up control that easily, Katherine came back with a witty retort, "my, my who ever would have thought little Elena could have so much courage, making demands like you control my decisions. I guess you have a little more Petrova fire in you then I realized."

"You have no idea," I responded as I fixed her with my best withering stare. She thought she was the big bad in this town, but after nearly a year of fighting with Klaus, I knew better. She was merely a tool that if used correctly could help keep the people I loved alive. I needed her if my plan was to succeed. She simply needed to be convinced of my unquestionable value. "Now, we can go back and forth with insults and threats or we can get right down to business."

"And what business would that be," she replied feigning boredom?

"Why killing Klaus of course," I answered. The color drained from her face and her trademark smirk disappeared. "I am quite busy, and I have things to do, so if you are interested, meet me tomorrow in the town square, and you and I can discuss how fun it's going to be to work together. Unless of course, you don't want to kill the man who butchered your family." I delivered my words with a cold detachment that I only reserved for Katherine. She and I were never close. No reason to start now.

"You seem to know a lot for someone who's never met me." She was clearly fishing for information, and I had no problem letting her in on my little secret. It was bound to come out eventually.

"See there's where you're wrong Katherine. You and I go way back. Don't feel bad for not remembering. I've traveled all the way from the future to stop you from enacting your idiot plan to hand me over to Klaus. So if I were you, I'd be extra nice to me. I am the only living person with the knowledge necessary to finally put an end to him. You need me."

"So it would seem. Tomorrow, at noon. Come alone," she demanded.

"You really aren't in a position to be negotiating, but since I'm feeling generous, deal." She left with far less theatrics then I would have suspected. John, who had stood stone still since I started speaking with Katherine, looked like he could use a drink. "Don't look so down John. I arrived just in time to stop Katherine from cutting your fingers off and stabbing you. A little gratitude couldn't hurt." I was using my sad attempt at humor to cut the awkwardness, an attempt that failed utterly. He simply kept muttering to himself trying to put the pieces together. I looked at him with a mix of pity and concern, and tried to reassure him, "I know it is a lot to take in, but I wasn't kidding when I said that I have places to be. I'll try to explain some of this later, but for now I have to go." I knew I had to get out of the house before my past self got home. That was a conversation that I was not ready to have. Too many questions that would need answering, and there was one person that I needed to see desperately. Once I saw him, it would all seem worth it. I used to house phone to dial his familiar number, and when his voice finally echoed out the receiver, I swear my heart leapt.

"Damon, we have to talk. Meet me at the hospital."


	2. Chapter 2

Damon and I have had a thousand conversations, about everything about nothing. This is the first one I ever felt the need to rehearse in my head. Being around him always felt so right, so natural, but coming back to a time where we were barely even friends feels so strange. After Stefan left, I relied on him, he was my rock, but this Damon won't remember any of that. He won't remember any of it. I have to keep repeating this in my head over and over again. But all the reasons and logic don't mean anything, when I get my first glimpse of his eyes in the hospital hallway. I drag him into an empty exam room without a word. I try to start the speech I had practiced in my head, but my words come out as muffled sobs. I don't even know if I am crying out of joy or sorrow, but within moments I feel Damon's arms encircle me. The sobs die down, I feel safe again, and I look up at him with a tiny smile.

And of course, Damon never misses a chance to ruin a perfectly good moment, he jokingly teases me "Come on, kissing me couldn't have been that bad could it?"

My laughter signals to him that whatever drama was on my mind has now passed. "I've missed that you know," I whisper.

"Missed what," he questions clearly confused?

"Your ability to make me laugh even when it seems like the entire world is falling apart," I admit freely.

"How could you even have time enough to miss me? I just saw you not even an hour ago."

My face falls a little, and he can immediately sense something is wrong. He is now covered in worry and fear. He thinks that I'm about to tell him that I regret the kiss on the porch. He doesn't even know it wasn't me. "About that. I need to tell you something," I whisper, suddenly strangely, nervous. "Katherine's back and she was the one who kissed you earlier tonight," I quickly confess hoping that blunt and swift is the best way to deliver this news.

"Then how did you even know about it," he questions quietly?

The hard questions have already started. I know I can't tell him everything. It would be too much too fast. Despite my fears, I know he is waiting for an answer, so I reply timidly, "because you told me about it a long time ago. Damon this may be difficult to hear in light of everything, but I'm from the future. I came back to change the course of events over the next year. As far as I know, my current self doesn't even know that I'm here. Unless of course, John regained his composure enough to tell her or I or me the whole story. I really don't know which pronoun to use in this instance."

After a long pause, Damon does something that I don't expect. He starts laughing. "That has got to be the lamest excuse that I have ever heard." He pauses for a moment, and his tone abruptly becomes serious, "if you regret kissing me, tell me that, but don't make up some lame excuse just to spare my …"

He doesn't even get to finish his thought before my lips are crashing into his. His lips mold with mine as a tiny whimper leaves my mouth. I can feel his right hand cradling my face as his other hand attempts to pull me closer. This feels better than any of our other kisses. This feels like coming home again. When I finally feel the need for oxygen, we break apart. Breathless and happy, I tell him, "I would never regret kissing you. I am telling you the truth, and I am from the future." I hear voices outside the room that I recognize. My past self is talking to Bonnie. "Peak your head out and see for yourself if you don't believe me," I tell him. His vampire hearing makes that unnecessary. He can hear everything my past self is telling Bonnie including the crazy little story of how John saw Katherine and some version of me saying that I was from the future.

"Ok, I believe you ," he sighed. "What does this even mean? What are you here to change? What are we to each other? What about my brother?" He keeps coming at me with a million questions a minute. I don't even know which one to respond to first.

"Stop, slow down, and breathe. I know you have questions, but please one at a time. First off, there are things that I can't tell you. I'm afraid that if I reveal too much at once that I could alter the future in ways that could be worse. Secondly, I wish that I could give you easy reassurances about you, me, or our future, but the truth is even if I decide right here and now to be with you forever, it won't change what past or current me thinks about you. I have to change her life in order to change our future, but I promise you that I will try. Before, I came here we weren't together. I was so scared of what it would be like to let myself fall for you that it kept me from truly living. My biggest regret is not being able to make things right before it was too late. I won't make that mistake again." I finally finished the slightly altered version of the speech that I had been carrying around in my head, and I felt a weight be lifted off my shoulders.

"When you said that it was too late to make things . . ."

"I don't want to talk about it. It's in the past or the future. A future that none of us will ever have to see again," I am practically yelling now. After I stop my little rant, I suddenly feel so guilty. I tried so hard to get back to him, and I pick a fight in the first ten minutes. Talk about learning from my mistakes. "Look, I'm sorry. I am just tired and stressed out. I shouldn't be taking this out on you. Forgive me?"

"Always," he whispers.

"Lets just table the us conversation for another day. Why don't we go save the day then we'll deal with relationship drama."

"Deal," he agrees.

"Good and we should probably keep this conversation just between us. Past me is not going to understand any of this, and I really don't want to watch my own head explode."

"So we act like nothing's different between us?"

"Exactly, for now." He silently nodded, but I could see the tiniest hint of sadness in his eyes. I don't know what compelled me to do it, but I was drawn into another hug with Damon. It seemed like habit now. Damon was sad, and I needed to hug him. It was our thing. The hug ended too quickly, but before I could leave the exam room, I asked the question that had been bugging me for too long. "Were you disappointed?"

"Disappointed about what?"

"When you found out that it was Katherine and not me who kissed you, were you disappointed?" I could hear my heart beating in my chest. If he said yes, it meant he was over Katherine for good. If he said no, well I didn't want to consider that possibility.

"Yes and no. I was disappointed when I thought that you didn't feel the same way about me, but Elena, I loved her for 145 years. That doesn't just go away when I start feeling something for you. I'm sorry."

I could tell that he meant it, but that didn't make my heart hurt any less. Damon cared about me in this time, but he didn't love me yet. How could he? We had barely started being friends. This was the beginning of our love story, and I was still living in the middle. I knew now how Damon felt all those times I rejected him. Telling someone you care about them, when you love someone else, isn't really as comforting as she had once thought. There was only one thing left to do. On top of everything else, she had to make Damon fall in love with her again. We walked out of the exam room in silence to face Bonnie and my past self. After the emotional roller coast of my conversation with Damon, I didn't think I could face another battle.


	3. Chapter 3

**Very short chapter, but I needed a bit of a filler, and I had very little time.**

The nice controlled and rational side of me had apparently taken a vacation in the past 24 hours, because I greeted Bonnie in the same way I was greeting everyone, with an incredibly awkward and out of place hug. At least this time I wasn't crying. I grabbed hold of Bonnie and kept excitedly saying how happy I was to see her and how much her friendship meant me. She probably thought I was insane. She mumbled some equally nice but entirely forced reply. As I pulled back, I took my first good look at my real life mirror, and I came up with a brilliant opening to our peculiar meeting.

"Hi, so if you haven't guessed already, I 'm you."

"Yeah, I figured that much out. John filled me in a little, and since you're hugging my or our best friend, I guessed you weren't Katherine." And I thought my greeting with Bonnie was awkward. At least she didn't know what pronoun to use either. After the world's longest pause ever, I figured I should break the tension.

"Listen, I know you have a ton of questions, but believe it or not we have bigger problems than my sudden time travel. Damon, you need to give Caroline some blood to heal her." I gave this command hoping this would refocus everyone's attention, and my past self gave the rebuttal I knew was coming.

"No, no way," She said.

Damon offered his defense, "just enough to heal her. She'll be safe in the hospital. It'll be out of her system in a day. She'll be better Elena."

This was officially the worst case of déjà vu. She offered her same stubborn opinion, as if she had any say in this, "no, I can't agree to that."

Bonnie finally piped in with the voice of reason, "do it. This is Caroline. We can't just let her die. Do it." Once Damon saw that both of our nods of approval, I knew the matter was settled.

"If I do this, you and me call a truce," Damon proposed as if he wasn't planning to do it anyway.

"No, but you'll do it anyway, for Elena," Bonnie responded with her smuggest knowing smile. My past self just stood there looking oblivious. How stupid I used to be. Before I could recover from my self loathing, I realized very quickly that there was one part of this encounter that I had forgotten. This became glaringly obvious to everyone, when my Aunt Jenna cleared her throat, while staring at her two identical nieces.


	4. Chapter 4

Well to my credit, I did not break down, cry or try madly hugging Jenna. I figured I owed her the truth before freaking her out with untimely displays of affection. Nothing could stop the dread from creeping into my veins. Once she knew, her life would never be the same. I was sadly reminded of a conversation Stefan and I had once. The memory feels so far away as if it belonged in another life to another person. He asked me if I was ready for every belief that I had to change. At the time, I thought I was. If I knew then what the truth would cost me, I probably would have run away and never looked back. It was too late for that now, and so I summoned what little courage I had left, and I finally spoke to the one person that I had failed the most, "Jenna, you and I need to have a little talk."

"You think," Jenna responded with sarcasm dripping on her every word? She had every right to be angry. All my lies were finally catching up to me. Bonnie and my past self stayed frozen either unable or unwilling to say a word. Damon looked on with an expression that I couldn't read. Whether it was pity, sadness, or regret, I couldn't tell, but I grabbed a hold of his arm, and gave it the tiniest reassuring squeeze. "I'll be okay. Just take care of Caroline, and tell everyone to meet me at the boardinghouse in an hour. I promise all of you that I'll try to explain this tonight." As Jenna and I were walking away, I turned back to make just one more request. "Damon, could you please bring Jeremy too? It would be so nice to have us all together again," I stated solemnly. He looked puzzled, but he nodded all the same. Jenna and I started the long walk to her car with my feet dragging all the way.

Jenna couldn't have known what I was about to tell her, but she sensed that it was a conversation not meant for the car ride home. She waited until I walked into the house and sat down at our kitchen table to utter her first words since the hospital. "What aren't you telling me Elena," she asked? She seemed more concerned than I would have expected and not nearly as angry as I deserved. "For weeks, you have been secretive, unwilling to let me in, and tonight I find you standing in the hospital with someone who looks identical to you in every way. Do you have a twin that I don't know about? Were you separated at birth, because I am looking for any rational explanation, and I can't think of one?"

"That's because there isn't a rational explanation," I explained. "The truth defies all reason and logic, but that doesn't mean it isn't real. Before I tell you what I know, you need to believe that I kept this from you to protect you. All I ever want to do was protect the people that I loved, but I failed you. I failed everyone. I'm so sorry," I whimpered the last part in between sobs. Jenna reached up to stroke my back, like she did when I was upset as a little girl. She had no idea what caused my sudden mood swing, but she kept rubbing my back all the same. Her aim was to comfort me, but it only made me feel guiltier.

"Elena, whatever you did and whatever secrets you kept, it doesn't make you a bad person. I'm still here for you no matter what, but you need to tell me now. My job as your aunt and you guardian is to protect you. Protecting me was never your burden," she finished and looked at me expectantly.

I reluctantly started the most terrifying tale Jenna would ever hear, "all the scary stories that you heard growing up from my mother about vampires, werewolves, and witches, they're all true. Bonnie is a witch, Stefan and Damon are vampires, and I'm a supernatural doppelganger that is the key to breaking an ancient curse." I was relieved when Jenna didn't laughing or ask if I was teasing her. Whether she believed me or not, she could tell that this was real for me. "I'm afraid that is only part of the story. The reason that you were seeing double at the hospital is because I'm from the future. Some witches sent me back in time to this day. I came back to stop terrible things from happening in the next year. The person that you saw me with at the hospital is the same Elena that you have been living with for the past several months. There is also one other person you should know about who I share an uncanny resemblance to."

"There are three of you," Jenna questioned? This was clearly reaching her tolerance level for abnormal.

"Yes and no," I replied. "The third person is my 500 year old vampire doppelganger named Katherine. She also happens to be my ancestor. I am trying to keep her out of town as often as possible, but to be safe, be on guard if I am ever acting strange."

Apparently shock and denial only lasted so long as a coping mechanism, because before I knew what hit me, Jenna was near screaming. "You're kidding right. You tell me that you're dating a vampire and that you have a vampire doppelganger, and you want me to discern when you're acting strangely? And which you, the Elena I've been living with for all these months, or the Elena who is apparently from the future? Because strange doesn't even begin to cover this."

"I know, but you wanted the truth," I reminded her. This seems to quell some of her righteous anger. She starts to calm down and within moments I see her silent acceptance of the truth. I am amazed at how strong she truly is. It took me much longer to come to grips with the reality of vampires. The tragic fact is that only now, do I realize what a mistake it was keeping the truth from her. She never needed my protection. Jenna was stronger than anyone gave her credit for.

"I understand why you were afraid to tell me the truth, but why are you so ashamed of it," she asked?

For someone who stayed in the dark so long, Jenna was strangely perceptive. "You're not the first person to ask me why I feel guilty about all of this. Martyr complex, post-traumatic stress, take your pick, everyone has their own theory, even my shrink," I admitted.

Jenna stared in disbelief. "You actually went to a psychiatrist. What made you change your mind? I practically begged you after the accident."

"It wasn't exactly a voluntary sort of thing." Her silence said more than words ever could. I could feel her shock, her empathy, and worst of all her pity. It radiated off her and felt as if it was suffocating me, because I didn't think that I deserved it. "I told you Jenna, bad things happen in the future. I lost more than I could bear, and it took me to a dark place. A life without hope for the future is an empty thing. To continue living when everything else has been taken away is to be truly dead. I was broken, and then the witches gave me a chance to come back and undo my mistakes, and it gave me hope. That hope is all that is sustaining me now."

I hadn't meant to tell her. I hadn't meant to tell anyone. I didn't want my emotional damage to burden the people that I loved. They weren't to blame for my failures, but I had forgotten what it meant to have people to rely on. I couldn't keep anything else from my family. Secrets had cost us all too much.

"Maybe hope is all that you had before, but you have me now. You have Jeremy and your friends. Whatever comes, we will fight it together. The future isn't written in stone. You proved that just by coming here. A person's fate can be altered. No matter what happens, I don't want you to ever feel like you're alone again. I'm here for you always and forever," Jenna assured me.

I had thought with all the crying that I had done in the past few hours that I would run out of tears but they kept flowing down my cheeks with reckless abandon. I clung to Jenna and whispered a half a dozen times, "I love you. I won't let you down. I promise." When my sobs died down, and I found my own strength again, I let go of Jenna. "There is still so much to tell you. I am supposed to meet everyone at the boardinghouse soon. You should come. I don't want you to feel excluded anymore. You are officially part of the inner circle, and we should get going before they start to worry." 


	5. Chapter 5

Jenna and I knock on the all too familiar door at the boardinghouse, and we are greeted by the last person in Mystic Falls that I want to see, Stefan. I try to act civil. I promised him I would try. Not his fault, not his fault, not his fault, becomes a mantra in my head. "Hi Stefan, can we come in," I ask with a plastered smile on my face?

Clearly acting is not my true calling, because Stefan's worried vampire look is as obvious as my discomfort. Despite his concerns, he moves aside to let us in. My ability to fake it is immediately put to the test when Stefan misjudges the moment and pulls me into a hug. He whispers in my ear, "Everyone filled me in about the spell that sent you here. I was so worried. You must be in shock." A year ago this would have been exactly what I needed. The man that I loved was showering me with concern and love. I should feel safe and cherished, but all I feel is a sickness growing in the pit of my stomach. Panic rises in my chest, and I roughly push him away.

Before I can stop the words from leaving my mouth, I am shouting at him, "don't you dare touch me again." I feel violated and nauseated. Once I regain my composure, I start to notice the stunned faces of everyone who clearly heard my little outburst from the living room. Convincing everyone that I'm not a total nutcase just got a lot harder. Damon runs up to me, but he keeps a safe distance as if the no touching rule applies to everyone. Without a thought, I fall into his arms. He cradles me there for a moment, holding my body and kissing the top of my head, until my breathing returns to normal and my heart stops hammering in my chest. I don't even need to look to see the puzzled expressions on the faces of my family and friends.

This is bizarre for all of them. Damon and I have never been close, not like this. I can feel the judgment coming off of Bonnie and to my surprise my past self as well, but the rest of our audience just looks concerned and confused. When I get a glimpse of Stefan's wounded expression, I feel the tiniest bit guilty. Two minutes in the same room together, and I already broke my promise. I'm blaming him for things he hasn't even done yet. This isn't fair to him. Rational thinking inhabits my body once more and I whisper an attempt at an apology, "I'm sorry. I've been through a lot tonight, and I just wigged out. Stefan, you haven't done anything wrong. Forgive me?"

He nods, but is obviously not convinced of my sincerity. "Of course, it is perfectly understandable. Why don't we all take a seat? You have our full attention whenever you're ready," he tells me in his most diplomatic voice. We move towards the living room, and Stefan carefully avoids my general vicinity. In spite of my apology, he senses that I need space, and he doesn't want a repeat of my verbal assault. I stand close to Jeremy and Alaric. Luckily neither one questions me, when I pull them both in a big group hug.

With half a dozen eyes patiently waiting on me, I start my long overdue explanation, "I wish I was standing here under less dire circumstances, but I'm afraid I have put you all in terrible danger. As some of you know, I am a descendant of Katherine Pierce or Katerina Petrova as she was once known. What you don't know is that the blood of my family line was used nearly a thousand years ago for an ancient curse. This curse was placed on a vampire named Klaus. He is from the original family of vampires, and it is from this family that all other vampires were created. The originals settled in what is now present day Mystic Falls. They lived peacefully here among their neighbors, a clan of werewolves. The mother of the originals even had an affair with one of the werewolf villagers, and it is from this union that Klaus was born. He is a hybrid, both werewolf and vampire. His mother cursed him to keep his werewolf aspect from manifesting, and he has been desperate to break this curse ever since. Because it was Petrova blood that the witch used to bind the curse, the sacrifice of the Petrova doppelganger is needed to undo it."

The reality of what I was saying started to sink in, and suddenly the room was filled with fear. I looked over at my past self, and felt a strange sense of pity. It was if she wasn't even a part of me. In that moment she just looked like a frightened little girl. I felt oddly protective, but my pity wouldn't save her, only the truth could do that, so I continued, "Katherine was meant to be sacrificed by Klaus almost 500 years ago, but she fled and turned herself into a vampire. Only a human doppelganger can break the curse, so Klaus murdered her entire family as punishment for running, and he has been hunting her ever since. If I thought turning myself over to Klaus would end this, I would do it, but Klaus is a destructive force that will ruin all of our lives no matter what we do. He must be stopped. I know how to kill him, but I need all of you to trust me," I pleaded.

"What does all of this have to do with Katherine? Her coming to town can't be a coincidence," Stefan concluded. I knew that I had to be careful. If I was going to use Katherine to help me, they needed to believe she was on our side. Stefan might never trust her if he knew that she came here to hand me over to be sacrificed.

I came up with the least destructive lie that I could think of, "She saw an opening to kill Klaus, and she is here to help. Katherine is an ally, and we need her if we are going to succeed." Apparently they trusted my future knowledge, because no one questioned my faith in Katherine's pure motives for coming to Mystic Falls.

"So what is our next move," Damon finally chimed in?

"I am talking to Katherine tomorrow about contacting an old friend. He will be the key to destroying Klaus. None of you have anything to worry about. Go about your lives just like you have been. I promise I will take care of everything," I assured everyone.

Damon appeared to be getting more upset with every word. He leaped up and started talking a mile a minute, "no, no way! You swoop in here and tell us the future is filled with pain and death, and then you say that you are facing it alone, like Hell. I don't care if you are from the future. Neither you nor your current self is facing this alone. I won't allow it. There is something you aren't telling us."

No matter what time we were in, Damon saw right through me, but things are different now and he needed to know that. "You're right. There is a lot that I am not telling you, and you want to know why? I spent a year with you and Stefan telling me what to do or worse what not to do. You did this all the in the name of protecting me and the people I love paid the price. Mark my words that will never happen again. You can't call the shots this time, because I am the only one with the answers, and I'm not sharing," I must have looked so childish yelling at him, but I didn't care. I finally said things that I had kept buried inside for too long.

His next words however gave me pause, "I'm just trying to protect you. Is it so wrong for me to care about you," he asked?

My face fell and my resolve was weakening. I could never make him understand. Damon would never accept a decision that put me in harms way, but I wasn't budging and neither was he. I sat down in front of him, and took his hands in mine. "You want to keep me safe. You would die for me, kill for me, I know that, but as much as you care about me, that is how much I care about you. Long ago in another time, I promised you that we would survive. I will make that same promise to you now. We are fighters. We are survivors you and I. Back then I asked you to trust me, and you did. You stood by me even when I was being impossible. I need you to trust in me now. I lived through sacrifices, hybrids, and originals. I didn't come all this way just to die now."

He nodded, but I knew this fight wasn't over. Damon simply didn't see another option, so he accepted defeat for now. It was then that I remembered our captive audience. If they weren't baffled by my behavior before, they were now. Stefan was fuming, but he didn't want to provoke another argument, so he simply charged up the stairs. I saw my past self trailing after him. Everyone else made convenient excuses to be elsewhere. Damon and I were quickly left alone before I excused myself. I borrowed my cell phone that my past self had left in her rush to console Stefan. There was one last loose end that needed tying up before the night was over.

I called the bed and breakfast Katherine stayed at when she came to Mystic Falls last time. Miss Flowers was kind enough to connect me to Katherine's room phone. "Hello Katherine," I said as if we were old friends.

"Well if it isn't my least favorite time traveler. Did you call to wish me sweet dreams," she asked sarcastically?

"Actually, I called to make sure that you didn't try something stupid like hurt my friends. You turned my friend into a vampire last time you arrived in town. Consider this your sole warning, if anyone I love is harmed, than our little deal is off, and I won't rest until you are dead. You might want to consider your alliances carefully, because I can give you something that you want even more desperately than killing Klaus."

"What could you possibly give that I can't simply take from you," Katherine asked curiously?

"Why Stefan of course. If you don't double cross me, I will make it my life's mission to see you two are blissfully happy together for all eternity. We can discuss the details tomorrow. Sleep tight." I hung up before she had a chance to respond. Caroline would never become a vampire, and Katherine wouldn't risk losing Stefan by hurting anyone. The future was looking up already.


	6. Chapter 6

Even after all my preparation and anticipation, I never dreamed my plan would be working this perfectly. I just had to stay one step ahead of Katherine, of Elijah, and of Klaus, and we all might make it out of this alive. With Katherine out of the way, I was safe until the masquerade ball.

Regardless of my success, my nerves were still shot. I was too wired to sleep, and I began pacing around the room that I had claimed in the boardinghouse. The room was closest to Damon's, but I pretended to want it for its excellent views. My anxiety made me regret not going with my past self to see Caroline, but I could tell from Elena's noticeable coldness, that I was the last person she wanted to spend the evening with. She and Stefan apparently got in a heated argument about me and Damon's moment earlier. I saw her storm out of Stefan's room, and before I knew it she was talking Caroline into staging a jail break from the hospital. Her relationship woes were apparently in need of some serious best friend time. Caroline was all for it, since she found the hospital depressing and alarmingly full of sick people. Secretly I thought she just wanted an excuse to get out in time for the carnival, but I kept my opinions to myself.

I headed downstairs on a mission to find some tea to calm my nerves, but when my search proved fruitless, I trudged back upstairs. Instead of returning to my room, I followed the light coming from under Damon's door. Despite the late hour, he was obviously still awake. As I debated whether or not to knock, I heard Damon's cocky voice from behind the door, "if you keep lurking outside my bedroom, I'm going to start thinking I have a secret stalker."

I opened the door to see him smiling smugly at me. I missed our witty banter. "Your vampire senses might make secretly stalking you a little difficult," I replied with a smile.

Damon was still in a playful mood, and he seemed determined to see how far he could push me. "I know you find me irresistible, but I have had a very tiring day. I'm not sure if I have the strength to properly tend to your desires tonight. But if you bed is truly so lonely, I suppose I could summon the energy. It would be ungentlemanly of me to refuse a lady in need" he jokingly teased me. It was in this moment that I realized Damon's lack of clothing. All that separated me from Damon's naked glory was a pair of black boxers that left far too little to the imagination.

I decided that I would call his bluff. Before Damon could object, I climbed onto his bed and straddled him. My hands started to wander all over his chest. Damon's eyes were the size of saucers, and his breath was coming in short pants. I whispered in his ear, "You forget Damon. I am nothing like proper little Elena in this time. I might just take you up on your offer if you push me too far."

Damon flipped me over and pinned my arms over my head. "You are one evil woman. My brother is just down the hallway sleeping, and you and I are already in hot water. If he wakes up to the sounds of your moaning, he might just decide to kill me once and for all. I for one do not have a death wish. There is far too much in my future worth living for," he stated while gazing into my eyes. Damon released me and moved back over to his side of the bed. His enjoyment of our little back and forth died down, and I could see something was troubling him. He tried several times before he could find the words, "your friends don't understand why you're suddenly treating me differently, and if I'm being honest, I don't know if I do. A few weeks ago, you were calling me a self-serving psychopath with no redeeming qualities. Now, you're crawling on top of me and telling me how much you care about me. What changed," he asked timidly?

I don't know if I have an answer for him. How could I explain to him what I could never explain to myself? For him this change was fast, but for me it all happened so gradually. I was half in love with him before I realized anything between us had changed. "Life, circumstances, they all changed. This thing with Klaus put me in life or death danger almost every day. You were there to protect me without question or hesitation. Klaus may be a heartless bastard, but he taught me who I could rely on and more importantly who I couldn't," I explained.

"You're talking about Stefan right? That's why you hate him? He let you down," Damon guessed?

"I don't hate Stefan. I just can't forgive him," I corrected.

"What could Saint Stefan have done that Elena Gilbert can't forgive? He nearly killed an innocent girl at a party where he was supposed to be your date, and you forgave him. What did he do that was so bad," Damon questioned?

"He made a choice, a selfish choice, and it cost me dearly. A part of me knows that it wasn't his fault, that he didn't know what would happen, and that he would gladly have died a thousand deaths to take it back, but I could never let it go. That day, that awful day, still haunts my nightmares, and every time I see his face, I judge him for causing me so much pain. He later told me that he wished that he had died that day, because he knew that I couldn't hate his ghost," I admitted sadly.

"You're doing that thing again where you're being cryptic and not telling me the whole story. So can you at least answer me one question," he asked exasperated?

"Of course, I figure I owe you that much," I replied more than a little worried about what he wanted to know.

"You said at the hospital that you never got a chance to tell me how you felt because it was too late. Something happened to me didn't it, something bad," Damon inquired?

This was just the conversation I had wanted to avoid, but I promised him one honest answer, "yes."

"That's why we weren't together when you left the future, because I died," he asked?

"It was one of the reasons," I answered.

"Was the other Stefan," Damon questioned?

"Yes, but not for the reason that you think. Stefan and I were long since over. He had left Mystic Falls to save your life, and he came back a different person. He left me to save you, and I will always love him for that, but the guilt of what he'd done was consuming him. He chose to turn it off rather than fight through it for me. My love wasn't worth accepting his guilt. Stefan never thought he was good enough for me after that, so he tried to destroy whatever feelings that I still had for him. It took me a long time to get over that. I spent so much time pushing you away that by the time I told you how I felt it was too late. You and I weren't together because you decided that you couldn't hurt Stefan by being with me. You said that I was right, and that in the end nothing was more important than the bond of family. Ironic isn't it? You spent 145 years trying to make him miserable, and when you finally had the chance to truly destroy him, you couldn't do it," I finish with a sad smile.

"I'm sorry for hurting you. I'm glad that you told me what happened, but it doesn't solve our bigger problem. Last time I checked, your current self is in love with Stefan. How were you planning for us to be together if you change the events that led you to abandon Stefan and fall for me," Damon asked?

"Simple really, the flaw in my relationship with Stefan wasn't Klaus. It was his belief that he wasn't good enough. If he starts to believe that I am better off without him, he will sabotage our relationship himself. You will wait in the wings to be your fabulous, wonderful self, and be there for me when everything falls apart. Eventually I will start falling for you, and with me whispering in her ear, it should be easy to push you both together," I finished explaining my flawless plan.

"Far be it for me to be the morality police, but isn't this just a bit manipulative. Can you really do this to Stefan, I mean you did love the guy once" Damon asked?

He was right of course. This whole plan fell in a major moral grey area, but I kept telling myself that it was what was best for all three of us in the end. "My plan is entirely manipulative, and that is why you will not be doing any manipulating. I will. It might not sound like it, but I do care about Stefan. I already have a plan to make sure that he is happy. It just won't be with me," I explained.

"I'm not sure how I feel about any of this, but I do trust you, so I need to trust that you are doing the right thing," Damon said.

Just as I am about to leave, I hear Damon's phone ring. He answers it and a horrified look crosses his face. He doesn't need to say a word for me to know that something has gone horribly wrong. "Elena, there's been an accident. The other Elena was out with Caroline and there was a drunk driver. Caroline's side took the brunt of the impact, and she was pronounced dead at the scene until she miraculously regained consciousness a minute later. My blood was still in her system. Caroline's in transition," Damon claimed. This can't be happening. I did everything right. I protected Caroline from Katherine, but it happened all the same. My friend was once again a vampire.


	7. Chapter 7

**Sorry it took me a little longer than usual to update, but I have had terrible writer's block ever since Thursday's episode. It is hard to write a character when you temporarily hate her. I'm still upset with Elena, but I am trying to separate that from my writing. That being said, I will be ignoring the events of 3x14 for the purposes of my story. I already had stuff planned in my head, and it just doesn't mesh well with what happened in 3x14. I would really prefer to pretend that episode never happened anyway. No idea how it happened, but this next chapter came out really Stelena heavy. Just indulge me for this chapter, and I will get back to the Delena stuff soon, I promise. Sorry it's so short, but this is more of a transition chapter.**

Apparently Stefan had received the call before Damon, because he was dressed and ready to leave before I had time to find my shoes. As I came downstairs, I noticed Stefan standing uneasily in the doorway looking at his feet. He glanced up at me and said, "Elena, the other Elena, called and told me she took Caroline back home with her for the time being. She asked if I could come over to help, but I wanted to check with you first. If you're not comfortable having me there, Elena will understand. "

"Of course Stefan, you have to come," I replied. "Caroline must be freaking out. She is really going to need a friend like you." Stefan looked taken aback by my eagerness for him to go and my confidence in his ability to help Caroline. My guilt suddenly came back with a vengeance when I registered his utter shock. I suppose I had been too hard on Stefan ever since I arrived. "Let's just say you were a great friend to Caroline the last time she went through this. She never would have survived without you," I answered to Stefan's unspoken question.

"Caroline was a vampire in your future too," Stefan asked curiously?

"Yes," I replied with tears rolling down my face. "I thought that I had prevented it, but I failed. I failed my best friend."

It's amazing how easy it is to fall back into old patterns. Stefan saw me break down, and he assumed the role he was used to playing, my loyal, caring boyfriend. May God forgive me, but I let him. He spoke in a soothing tone and told me, "you didn't fail. All this means is that you were never meant to save her. Fate can be a tricky thing to run from."

"Tell me about it. As much as things change, they still stay the same. What if the future can't be altered? What if free will is an illusion and all of us are destined to the same fate regardless of the choices we make," I asked Stefan, not really expecting him to answer?

"If that were true, the witches wouldn't have sent you back. Our choices are what define us. I have to believe that. If our destinies are decided for us, then what would be the point of living, of making decisions? Maybe we just have to accept that some things happen for a reason, even this, and if that's true, then you coming back in time happened for a reason too. I don't know what you're still keeping from me, and I don't know what our future will hold, but you should know that I believe in you. I believe that you can stop whatever darkness lies before us," Stefan promised me. He put his hand on my back as if to reassure me, and he seemed relieved when I didn't flinch away. It was a nice moment of peace between Stefan and I, and we hadn't had one in a long time, but that moment quickly passed once I saw Damon standing behind us. I couldn't tell if Damon looked more confused, jealous or hurt, but I knew that he certainly had heard the conversation between Stefan and I. I realized he was questioning whether I meant what I had said to him, or if I was going to run back to Stefan at the first sign of trouble. As if I hadn't had enough jealous vampire crap for one day.


	8. Chapter 8

**First off, I want to thank all the people that have reviewed. You guys are what keep me updating. Secondly, I want to apologize to all my readers if it seems like my story is moving really slowly. I am eight chapters in and not even 24 hours has passed in the story. I am trying to bring the story back to the sacrifice and how Elena is going to change it, but there are a lot of emotional considerations that come with what Elena is trying to do. This story is about uncovering Elena's past and why she is so desperate to change her future. It is about future Elena's emotional journey, and that can be slow to write. The story goes where the inspiration takes it, and my inspiration is telling me this is going to be a long story before I am done with it. So please stick with me, and I hope you enjoy.**

Five minutes and one awkward car ride later, we arrive at the house. I let Stefan go in first and tell him to give me a few minutes to talk with Damon. Our moment of peace has bought me some good will, so he agrees without complaint and walks inside to deal with Caroline. While Stefan deals with one neurotic vampire, I have to deal with my own. "It didn't mean anything, Damon," I tell him.

"When it certainly looked like something while you and Saint Stefan were gazing adoringly into each other's eyes," Damon bites back sarcastically. "It was touching. I'm sure Hallmark would love a picture for one of their cards," he spouts out angrily.

Damon's hurt, pissed, confused, and I know it's partially my fault. He maybe overreacting to the situation, but my past indifference and tendency to call him an unfeeling psychopath are to blame. I remind myself that this is still new for him. 24 hours ago, I was his brother's girl who only gave him the time of day when I needed something. I claimed we were friends back then, but it wasn't true. Friendship is a two sided partnership of give and take. All I ever did was take. I couldn't fault him for being a skeptic. "I have history with Stefan, and I couldn't change that if I wanted to. Don't confuse that history for something that it's not," I plead with him. "Katherine may have played you both against each other, but I'm not her, Damon. I would have thought you had learned at least that by now," I whisper feeling a bit hurt myself. My hand reaches up to caress his cheek, and he leans into my touch. He needs to hear this part, and I always grab ahold of Damon when I need his undivided attention. It's the only way that his thick skull can process what I am saying. "I don't want you both. I just want you. That doesn't mean that I need to treat Stefan like a leper every time I see him. He might start asking questions that I don't want to answer," I explain.

Clearly Damon isn't convinced, because he starts arguing with me in hushed tones. "How am I supposed to believe that? After months of watching you fawn over Stefan, how I am supposed to know that you want me and only me," Damon questions? His face looks desperate, and his shoulders are hunched over as if defeated.

Something needs to break this mood, because this is far too much depressing for one day. I make a feeble attempt at levity hoping that it will break through the wall that Damon has put up. "Well with Stefan, I let him touch my back in an attempt to comfort me over my friend's recent vampirism. With you, I climbed into your bed and straddled you in an attempt to seduce you. Are we seeing the difference," I ask hopefully? A small smile graces my lips.

Damon stands silent for a moment weighing my every word and determining whether or not he believes me. When I see him smile back, I know that he has accepted my explanation. "I don't have much experience in this area, but I'm pretty sure after a couple's fight, we have makeup sex. Since your place is presently occupied, I think that means we should head back to my bed," Damon replies with a sexy grin.

As tempted as I am by his offer, I know that Caroline really needs a friend right now, and my absence would be noted. I decide to playfully hit Damon and roll my eyes at his suggestion. "We can do dirty later. I have to help Caroline now," I tell him. I stop before I open the door as a realization hits me. "Now that I think about it, you might want to go home," I advise.

He looks perplexed, since I dragged him all the way here just to tell him to leave at the front door. "Trying to get rid of me already," Damon asks?

"Caroline isn't exactly your biggest fan. I can't say she will be happy to see you," I warn Damon. He has no idea how scary Caroline can be when she is angry, and that was before she was a vampire.

"I'll take my chances with blondie. Sitting at the boardinghouse waiting for you to come home is not my idea of a good time," he responds confidently.

My door expectantly swings open and Caroline is casually leaning against the entryway with a smile that screams trouble. "Hello, Elena," Caroline greets me, never breaking her creepy smirk. Just as Damon is about to make some inappropriately timed sarcastic remark, I see Caroline shove him with all of her vampire strength. He goes flying through the air and lands with a thud. "Oh, I'm sorry your invitation must have gotten lost in the mail," Caroline tells Damon, feigning remorse. "Dicks who use me for sex and blood are not invited in," Caroline states, before kicking Damon one last time to emphasize her point.

"I did try to warn you," I remind Damon with a twinge of sympathy in my voice. "It's probably best if you go. The neighbors aren't up at this hour, and we don't need them waking up to you and Caroline beating the living daylights out of each other," I reason. Damon reluctantly picks himself up and speeds off into the night. "So I guess you've transitioned then," I ask Caroline in an attempt to refocus her attention?

"Stefan gave me the 411, and he brought a blood bag from home. Dying would have seriously put a kink in my plans for junior year. Clearly you all would be lost without me," Caroline states with a fake smile. I've been her friend long enough to know when she is putting on a tough act. I run into her arms and hold her tight as we both break down on my front lawn. There is no telling how long we stayed out there hugging and crying, but when we both ran out of tears, I suggest "why don't we take this inside. You and I have a lot to talk about."


	9. Chapter 9

**I know this update is crazy short, but it is getting harder to find time to write. I can be a bit of a perfectionist; I obsess over word choice and tone, so it takes forever to write a chapter, let alone a long one. **

When I catch my first glimpse of Caroline in the light of my living room, I realize our conversation will have to wait. While Caroline could never look anything less than gorgeous, her body betrays her true exhaustion. I look at my watch and realize it is nearly dawn. Neither Caroline nor I have slept all night, and I still have a meeting with Katherine at noon. Since my own home is currently filled with my very human family and newborn vampires aren't known for their self-control, I recommend Caroline crash at the boardinghouse. Stefan can keep an eye on her, and I can attempt an explanation after we both get some much needed rest. Caroline lets out a breath of relief and nods with a weak smile at my invitation. She seems eager to put an end to this long emotional day. Caroline rides to the boardinghouse with Stefan and I in melancholy silence. Before I allow myself to finally rest, I check on Caroline one last time, only to find her fast asleep.

I smile at my best friend sleeping peacefully and tiptoe back to my room, careful not to make a sound. As I make my way back to my room, I notice Damon is waiting just inside looking slightly annoyed. "Really, you bring blondie back here after she uses me as a punching bag to vent her emotional drama? I am now convinced you are trying to get me killed," Damon replies half-jokingly.

I return his smirk and decide to tease him a little. "Is Damon Salvatore afraid of a newborn vampire? You're not going soft on me are you," I ask, moving so close to Damon we are almost touching?

Nothing prepares me for the sudden rush of movement as Damon basically throws me on my bed. He hovers over me and runs his hands over my stomach inching up my shirt as he starts blowing the tiniest whiff of air on my flat belly. I shiver at the attention and momentarily forget my fatigue. Damon leisurely travels up my body placing tiny kisses on every inch of my skin. Just when I am about to scream for him to take me now, he whispers in my ear, "I'm not soft. You had an entire year of soft and yet here you are underneath me practically begging for me to fuck you into next week. What you need is passion and fire. My skin burns at your slightest touch. Your kiss ignites something inside of me that I thought had died long ago, but that doesn't make me soft. I don't fear baby vampires, and I don't take well to teasing. You will remember that if you ever want me to truly ravish you," Damon says as he rises from my bed, waves wickedly, and leaves the room. I let out the loudest huff of frustration. How can Damon say I'm the evil tease in this relationship? Damon claims to be a gentleman and then he leaves a lady hot and bothered. He may have had over 160 years to learn patience and restraint, but I am still a horny teenage girl. I plot my revenge before drifting off to sleep.


	10. Chapter 10

The annoying beeping from my phone alarm wakes me from my restless sleep, and I spend a moment debating whether to turn over and go back to sleep. Sadly, I have a lot riding on this meeting with Katherine today, and I need to get ready. I pull on some clothes and head down the stairs only to be greeted with the sight of an overly perky Caroline making breakfast. She clearly threw herself into preparing breakfast in the same way she throws herself into organizing school functions, she went a little overboard. The table is filled with cereal, bagels, muffins, croissants, french toast, pancakes, bacon, eggs, juice, and danish. I'm not sure if I walked into the Salvatore dining room or a continental breakfast at the Ritz, because they appear eerily similar.

Before I have time to question Caroline's sudden interest in breakfast, she is bringing me coffee, offering me a plate, and picking out a few breakfast items that she claims will be particularly delicious this morning. Warning bells are ringing loudly in my ears, but I ignore them until Caroline finally states the obvious. "Okay, so the food is a bribe. A delicious pastry filled bribe, because I want to talk, and you are going to spill."

Of course she has questions. She turned into a vampire less than 12 hours ago, though I don't know why she thinks she would have to bribe me to get answers. "I know that I haven't always been honest with you Caroline, and I'm sorry. I also don't know what Stefan or the other Elena told you, but from this point forward I'm an open book. Ask any question and I'll answer it," I tell her putting my hand over hers pleading with her to believe me.

I was more than willing to be open with Caroline, if only she wanted to talk about her recent transformation. This being Caroline, she had other things on her mind. "Great, so why don't we start with why I overheard you talking about straddling Damon the other night at your house, while Stefan was taking care of me? What does your open book say about that, because last time I checked you have a boyfriend who loves you? One who coincidentally doesn't get his rocks off making a meal out of your friends." Caroline barks angrily at me. I briefly start to wonder where Stefan is in the house, and if his vampire hearing can pick up our conversation. "He's not here, if you're wondering," Caroline replies as if reading my mind.

My mind is racing. Out of all of the topics that she could want to discuss, she picks the one I don't want to talk about. I suddenly understand the need for a bribe. I place another croissant on my plate, and ask the only question that really matters. "Does Stefan know what I said to Damon last night," I inquire, more than a little concerned about the answer? It was so stupid talking to Damon like that on the porch. Caroline could have confided in Stefan, or worse Stefan could have overheard us. The fear that grips me is quickly extinguished.

Caroline shakes her head no. "Luckily for you Stefan isn't big on eavesdropping, and I'm not big on ratting out friends. I am however a busybody, which you would do well to remember now that I have vampire hearing." She reminds me with a smile that doesn't quite reach her eyes. "You are one of my best friends, and I'm not trying to judge you, but I need to understand why you would do this to Stefan and to yourself." Her concern is evident is every word.

I scoot closer to Caroline and stare up at my friend with saddened eyes. After all the pain that I suffered in the past few years, it's easy to forget how much my friends have lost along the way. Caroline alone overcame a toxic relationship with Damon, a sudden transformation into a vampire, the dissolution of her relationship with Matt, the loss of her father, and the loss of the man that she loved. People spoke frequently of my strength, but when I fell completely to pieces, Caroline was the one to try and save me. The truth is the least that I owe her. "You have every reason to hate Damon for what he did to you. He used you, controlled you, and fed on you. I understand if you can't forgive him. But as bad as he was to you, he was wonderful to me."

Caroline stares at me clearly unconvinced. My tactics obviously aren't working. I think if Caroline just understood what Damon suffered in his quest to find Katherine, she might be able to understand his erratic behavior towards her. "This isn't meant to excuse his behavior, but your relationship with him was at a time when Damon wasn't stable. He spent 145 years searching for a way to free the woman he loved from a mystical prison. It was finally within his grasp, and he lashed out when he feared his plan might fall apart. He took it all out on you and I'm sorry, but the man who did those things isn't the same man that I talked to on the porch last night. Losing Katherine changed him. Profound loss shapes us all. I know that better than anyone. When all hope seemed lost, Damon was there for me. He stood by me even when I didn't deserve it. I fell for him," I admit to Caroline's total shock.

After she sputters a few incomprehensible sounds, she finally regains her train of thought. "You fell for Damon, bad boy Damon. I just thought you wanted to sleep with him," Caroline tells me with her eyes bulging. I can't help but laugh at her total disbelief. She looks mildly irritated that I seem to be making fun of her. After she recovers, she takes my hand again and asks the question that must have been floating around in her head since last night. "Do you love him," Caroline questions in a whisper?

"I do," I admit to her in an even lower voice.

Fortunately, she is too good of a friend to judge me for that. Since we were kids, Caroline has been the biggest advocate of the belief that you can't help you fall in love with. Caroline simply smiles and says with disbelief, "Wow, someone loves Damon Salvatore. I never thought I'd see the day."

"Neither did he," I counter. A surprising look of pity crosses Caroline's face. I am amazed that she has any capacity for compassion for Damon, until I remember that Caroline knows more about being unloved than any of my other friends. She may not be able to forgive Damon, but her sympathy for his former pain might make it easier for her to be civil.

We both sit in silence for a moment, letting each other's words sink in until Caroline shakes her head as if remembering something she had forgotten. "Wait, you still haven't answered my question," Caroline declares. I gape at her confused. She reads my expression and reminds me of her question. "I asked you how you could do this to Stefan. Even if I believe that Damon's hidden pain is the reason he was such a jerk to me, that doesn't explain how you could cheat on your boyfriend with his brother."

"Stefan wasn't my boyfriend in the future," I admit. "We barely even spoke anymore. Stefan may act like a good guy. Sometimes he may even be a good guy, but he is also capable of greater evil than you can imagine. While every person born into this world is capable of great good and great evil, this capacity is only intensified when you become a vampire. The good in a person can become greatness, and the bad can become true villainy. I discovered this to my eternal sorrow. Stefan committed an unforgiveable sin, and two months before the witches sent me back, I swore to him that I would hate him forever. My resolve to keep that promise may have softened, but believe me when I tell you that I owe Stefan nothing," I spat back.

Clearly my vague responses are as annoying to Caroline as everyone else, because it only takes a second for her to ask the million dollar question. "What did Stefan do," Caroline asks? Her face scrunches up in a look of pity and concern, two emotions that I am far too familiar with these days.

Two months of therapy have clearly not prepared me for this question. I am fighting back tears as I try to recount the worst day of my life. "They died. They all died, and it was Stefan's fault," I confess. Before I can move on to the rest of my story, I look up only to see a heart broken Stefan standing a few feet away. My emotions are all over the place and Caroline has lost her voice once more, but the one thing that I know for certain looking at Stefan's face is that he heard everything.

**Please Review. It helps inspire me to keep writing.**


	11. Chapter 11

**Okay, so this is the longest chapter I have ever written. It took me forever, so it might be awhile before I update again. Heads up, there is a lot of dialog in this chapter, because it revolves around Elena finally explaining everything. I'm sorry if it's a lot, but the story itself is very involved. Also quick reminder, I started writing this story before 3x14 aired, so be sure to ignore anything that happened with Esther after 3x13. I basically changed her character completely. I also ignored Finn, because let's face it, he was boring. As always, I hope you enjoy.**

Stefan uses his vampire speed to race up to his room before I utter another word. I look to Caroline and we share a quiet understanding before I go bounding after him. We may not be together, but I still need to make sure he's okay. On my way up, I run right into a very troubled Damon. With one look, I discover what is bothering him. "You heard everything too," I ask already knowing the answer?

Damon nods with a sad smirk replacing the typical arrogance. Whatever Damon's feelings towards his little brother, he didn't want this for him. Chalk it up to brotherly love or a sense of loyalty, but Damon was clearly concerned about his little brother. Not that he would ever say it.

Never one to keep the mood dark for too long, Damon attempts to make me smile. As I continue my ascent up the stairs, Damon gets in one last quip. "Little tip for later, if you want to have a furtive conversation with blondie, don't do it in a house full of vampires," Damon teases.

"Now he tells me," I respond back jokingly. My smile fades quickly the closer I get to Stefan's room. When I walk in, I see Stefan staring out the window, and I don't think I have ever seen him look so lost. It's amazing how only a few overheard words can destroy him completely. I never considered the possibility that vampires could be so fragile, but Stefan appears perilously close to breaking.

When he finally breaks the silence, his voice sounds cold and detached. "Come to tell me how I murdered all our friends," Stefan asks never bothering to look at me? I can tell that he is trying to shut his emotions out, but his animal diet makes that impossible.

I try to downplay his involvement in the hopes that Stefan will let this go. There are some truths that no one needs to hear. "What you heard was taken out of context. You didn't murder them. They died," I promise.

Clearly Stefan isn't buying my deflection, and he finds the hole in my story. "Because of something that I did," he questions?

I know that I've been caught, so I give honesty a try. "Yes," I admit. "But it's not as bad as you think. You made one bad decision and rest just kind of snow balled. You don't have a crystal ball Stefan, and you couldn't have known what would happen," I assure him.

If someone had told me a month ago that I would be defending Stefan to himself, I would have told them that they were the ones who should have been committed. But no matter what Stefan's actions caused, my pity for him finally overcomes my anger. I put my hand on Stefan's cheek and press our two foreheads together. His arms wrap around my back and I hold him there as a few tears escape his eyes. He is the first one to pull away, and he sits silently on his bed. "I want the whole story, Elena. No more evasions or vague answers. Tell me the truth, good and bad," Stefan calmly demands.

I'm not sure if Stefan's stable enough for that. I'm not sure if I'm stable enough for that. No person on Earth has ever heard the whole story. Caroline didn't want to push me, and I knew the reality would only make my shrink think I was crazier. I let out a heavy sigh and issue a warning that I hope Stefan will heed. "Trust me when I tell you that the truth about the future is best left there. If I'm successful in stopping Klaus, it won't matter what happened in some alternate future that you will never live to see. Why does it matter," I question pleading with him to drop it?

My luck has never been that great, and Stefan attempts to sway me with a convincing argument. "It matters because now that I know part of the truth, my imagination will start filling in the blanks about what you're not telling me. The future may be dark, but nothing can be as bad as some of the scenarios flowing through my mind. If I don't know the truth, I may never be able to rest easy again," Stefan explains.

"There's no turning back Stefan. Once I tell you this, you will never be able to erase it from your memory. The truth may haunt you worse than the fiction," I warn.

"Maybe, but that's a risk I am prepared to take," Stefan replies with certainty. His resolve is strong, and I realize he will never let this go until he learns the truth. I just wish he knew what he was asking.

I struggle for where to begin. Stefan needs to understand the path that led him to that day if he is to understand the events that followed. I decide on the night he left with Klaus. It might not have been the first domino to set this all in motion, but it is the most relevant one. "Several months ago, Damon was dying of a fatal werewolf bite, and you made a deal to save his life. The vampire that I told you about, Klaus, his blood was the cure, and he wanted you to join him in his life of hedonistic blood sucking. You agreed to go back on human blood, abide by his every request, and leave Mystic Falls behind in exchange for saving Damon's life. While you were with him, he asked you to do some very bad things," I explain trying to skip over the gory details.

Stefan quickly catches my vague description, and he calls me on it. "I asked for a non-vague answer to my questions. What do you mean by very bad things," he asks clearly growing more worried by the second?

"You killed people," I finally confess. Stefan looks horrified, but I remind myself that this is what he asked me for. If he wants the full truth, I won't hold anything else back. "You ripped them apart, tortured them, and put their bodies back together when you were done. You left bodies scattered from Florida to Tennessee," I answer without a trace of my former sympathy. "Damon and I searched for you. We nearly got ourselves killed a half a dozen times trying to bring you home. When I finally found you again, you persuaded me in the cruelest way possible that you cared nothing for your old life and that you cared nothing for me." Tears flood my eyes once more, and I am amazed that his rejection can still sting after all this time. It's almost like the pain of phantom limbs. Nothing is there, but the body still remembers what it lost. Stefan makes a move to wipe away my tears, but I brush his hand away. He doesn't deserve to comfort me, not about this.

I decide to continue on with the story disregarding my emotional outburst. "When you eventually broke free of Klaus, you were wracked with guilt," I explain. "Instead of dealing with it, you convinced yourself that all hope was lost. You deluded yourself into thinking that I had given up on you, that I couldn't love you, and that Klaus had taken everything from you. After that realization sunk in, your only desire was for revenge on Klaus."

I'm not prepared for his next question and it hits me like a Mack truck. "Did you still love me," Stefan questions in a shameful whisper?

I haven't asked myself that question in a long time, but I know the answer all the same. "Yes, I did, for a long time actually, but I could never convince you of that fact. You hated yourself so much that you couldn't imagine how anyone could still love you." The tragedy of it all makes my heart ache, but I carryon. "Your desire for revenge consumed your entire being, so much so that you used me in a faceoff with Klaus. You fed me your blood and threatened to drive me off Wickery Bridge," I explain sadly. Stefan looks shocked and confused and like he's forgotten how to breathe. I used to love him, so I don't need words to know the thoughts racing in his mind. He thinks that he would never do that. He thinks that he loves me, and he thinks that he has never hated himself more than he does in this moment. I feel so sorry for him knowing that I haven't even gotten to the worst part of the story.

After giving him a moment to recover, I continue with the saddest story ever told. "We were told that a coffin that Klaus carried with him was the key to killing him. You stole the coffin and persuaded Bonnie and her mother to open it with magic. Inside the coffin was Klaus' mother, a resurrected witch named Esther," I tell Stefan in a quick rush to get this over with.

"After she was awakened, she invited you, me, and Damon over to their home. She sat us all down and explained that she had had a change of heart. Esther was a mother above all else, and she begged us to understand that killing her own son would be an atrocity. She promised us all safety in exchange for peace with her family. This truce didn't sit well with you. Damon noticed your rising temper before I did. He tried to calm you down. We both did, but your anger was erupting uncontrollably. You only lived for revenge, and when that was taken away, you snapped. You tried to kill Esther, but because she was an incredibly powerful witch and 1000 years old, she easily defeated you, but she spared your life. If it had been up to Esther, the matter would have ended there. You were upset, and she understood that, but Klaus was in the same house, and he came running when he heard the commotion. After he realized you attempted to kill his mother, he took his revenge on you in the only way that he could. He needed my blood to make more hybrids, so he went after the only other person that you loved."

"Damon," Stefan finishes for me.

Up till now, I have maintained my composure admirably, but describing the next string of events shatters my heart and soul. "I watched as Klaus drove a dagger through Damon's heart," I admit. The tears are streaming down my face, and I have to stop after some words to muffle the sobs. When I find my voice again, I continue.

"His body slumped to the ground and he turned unnaturally gray and lifeless. I don't remember much after that, but I remember throwing myself on his body, and shaking him, begging him to wake up." I have to stop for another minute as I take my head in my hands and struggle to breathe again. This story has brought up a lot of memories that I have spent months trying to forget. Just as Stefan thinks the story can't get any worse, I have to pile on.

"The next thing I see is you throwing yourself at Klaus' brother, Kol. Somehow you get your hands on a dagger, and you make a move to shove it in Kol's heart. Klaus stops you before it goes in, and it's a good thing that he did, because killing an original is fatal to vampires, a fact that you knew very well. Though I don't think you cared much whether you lived or died. Your brother was dead, and regardless of what you say about one another, I know that you loved him. Losing him destroyed whatever control you had left," I claim grimly. "Klaus took your attack on Kol as a final insult. He resolved to make you suffer and destroy what little you have left to live for. He was gone for almost two hours. Rebekah was guarding us until Elijah walked in demanding to know why we were being detained. Elijah commanded Rebekah to release us, but it was too late. The damage was done," I whisper.

I struggle to maintain a cool detachment as I recount the rest of the story. If I let my feelings come rushing in, I know I will never finish. "As Elijah was escorting us back home, Klaus ambushed us, broke Elijah's neck and then yours. He had blood caked on his clothing. Some of it was so fresh it was still dripping on the ground. That's when he decided to show me the pictures of his handiwork. He forced me to watch as he showed me a slideshow of my friends' mangled bodies. Klaus said he killed Bonnie first, snapping her neck before she even sensed his presence. Alaric was next, his hand was chopped off and then his head. With Matt, he decided to get inventive. He stole his truck and then ran over him with it six times. He ordered Tyler to rip his own heart from his chest. Jeremy he took his time killing. My baby brother was tortured brutally before he was torn apart. The body was so unrecognizable that the medical examiner had to make the ID with dental records. The only person spared was Caroline. Klaus was infatuated with her, and his creepy obsession saved her life. Klaus let me and Stefan go after that. He said that the pleasure that he got in watching us suffer would be all the retribution he required," I recount with a hollow expression. Numbness has surged through my body, and it replaces the consuming, searing pain of the past. I wonder if this is what a vampire feels like when they flip the switch on their humanity. If it is, I can understand the appeal.

Stefan looks like he is going to throw up on his rug. I did try to warn him that this wasn't a story for the faint of heart. It seems strange that after more than 160 years on this Earth, Stefan can still be surprised at the capacity for true evil. I decide to give him a little rest before I catch him up to present day.

After fifteen minutes of pacing and pained glances, I conclude that Stefan is strong enough to finish. "Elijah came to see me the next day," I start again. "His words were mostly lost on me, but I remember him telling me that due to Klaus' recent massacre, Esther was plagued with guilt. She never wanted innocent people to die. Elijah promised me justice for my family and friends. He convinced Esther to destroy Klaus and by days end he was dead," I narrate bitterly.

My bitterness turns into cruelty as I make a pointed jab at Stefan. "I never asked you if your revenge was as satisfying as you had hoped, but for me it was empty. Klaus' death didn't bring back my family, my friends, or Damon. After Klaus died, the next several weeks passed in a fog. Elijah forced his family to flee Mystic Falls under penalty of death and Mystic Falls was finally safe. The surrounding towns weren't as lucky. Caroline and her mother took me in. They tried to take care of me, but I was inconsolable. Even though they never told me directly, I could hear Caroline whisper with her mom about animal attacks in neighboring towns. I didn't need any more information to know it was you. Your rage and your grief erupted into a destructive violent force that destroyed everything in its path. After a few weeks, the reports stopped. I didn't know if you had stopped killing, left town, or if the council had finally killed you. Truth be told, I didn't much care," I admit.

Stefan looks mortally wounded by my words, but I promised him the truth. Sadly the truth isn't complete just yet. There is still the last chapter of the story. "The next time I saw you was almost a month later. Caroline convinced me to leave the house to go to the Grill for some lunch. While she parked the car, you ran up to me proclaiming all sorts of apologies. Before Caroline had time to intervene, I picked up a pencil that a waiter had left on a nearby table and I shoved it in your gut. My anger clouded my judgment, because I realized that I just stabbed my ex-boyfriend in front of about 15 witnesses. I screamed at you that I would hate you forever as Caroline pulled me away," I explain to Stefan's shock and horror.

"You later told me it was concern for my well-being that compelled you to file charges. You convinced a judge that I was a danger to myself and others, and you had me forcibly committed. After more than a month of intensive therapy, you came to visit me. You tried to apologize again, and you detailed how you went from murderous rampage to brooding and contrite. Apparently, Katherine found you after she climbed out of whatever rock she was hiding under. She convinced you that you owed it to Damon, to me, and to all the people who died, to fight for your humanity. I may never understand the pull she has over you, but Katherine saved you when I couldn't, and it wasn't the first time. After you were done recounting the past couple months, you told me that you made a deal with the witches to send me back in time. Your only request was that I try not judge you by your future mistakes. As they say the rest is history," I finish trying to remember that I am here to change the story, not dwell on the past.

Stefan doesn't say much for a long time, and he stays on his bed processing until he finally thinks of a question I haven't answered. "I hurt you. I left you, and I'm responsible for the death of nearly everyone that you love. I don't blame you for hating me, but I need to know without judgment or criticism how you fell in love with my brother? You claimed that he was a self-serving psychopath not even a month ago. How did this happen," Stefan asks still puzzled?

Everyone seems puzzled. I feel like I am a broken record defending Damon to the people that I love. Stefan's confusion is the most infuriating, because he should understand better than anyone. "You sacrificed everything, your freedom, your home, your relationship with me, even your humanity all to save Damon's life. That means that there is a part of you that remembers something good in him, something worth loving. Over the next year, I discovered that goodness inside of him. He let me see his heart, his beautiful heart, and all he asked in return was mine. You shouldn't ask yourself why I fell for him. You should ask how I couldn't. He's an honorable man behind all his pain and his emotional damage. Damon is capable of true greatness. All he needs is someone to believe in him. I don't say this to hurt you, but Damon took care of me after you left me. He was there when you weren't, and I don't feel guilty about what happened while you were gone," I proclaim brazenly.

I glance at my watch and realize it is 11:45. If I want to meet Katherine on time, I have to leave now. It seems wrong to leave Stefan after dumping all this on him, but I have to keep my meeting to keep everyone alive. I pass by Damon in the hallway and ask him a favor. "Take care of him, ok. He's your little brother, and that means something whether you want to admit it or not," I remind Damon forcefully. This leaves me with a clear enough conscience to go meet with Katherine, and I pray that my day can't get any worse.

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	12. Chapter 12

**I realize my past two chapters have been very Delena light, but the next one I promise to be Delena heavy. **

I spot the she-devil herself reclining comfortably on a bench in town square. As I'm walking towards her, I reflect on what a bad idea it was having Katherine meet me in public. Immediately, I begin formulating explanations for people seeing double. Most of the people I love know the truth, but Matt and Tyler are still in the dark, not to mention acquaintances and local residents. Jenna's switched at birth theory is looking pretty good right about now. Sadly, I have more important matters to worry about than what the town gossips will say about my vampire doppelganger.

As if on cue, Katherine makes what is always her first mistake. She starts talking. "I hear your little blonde best friend is now part of our special club. Remind me again why I should trust someone to protect my interests when she can't even protect her best friend," Katherine questions flippantly? The sound of my hand making contact with her face is the only noise that I hear in the quiet town square. Katherine recovers quickly, and my slap does nothing to wipe the grin off her face.

"Well aren't we feeling moody today, and here I thought we were a team. Keep up that attitude and you might have me reconsidering my alliances," Katherine taunts cockiness oozing from every syllable.

I let out a humorless laugh. Usually I can stand her smug arrogance, but today my patience is dangerously thin. We both know she's bluffing and I call her on it. "Don't kid yourself," I advise angrily. I step right up into her face, so Katherine will know that she doesn't scare me. I've already lived through my worst nightmare. Bitchy vampire with attitude really doesn't rank. She pauses and tilts her head to the side as if trying to figure me out.

Instead of playing her game, I decide to pick her apart for a change. "Here's how I know you won't betray me," I explain nonchalantly. "You want Klaus dead, you want to stop running, and most importantly you want justice for your family," I claim. Her face softens at the mention of what she'd lost lifetimes ago, and Katherine turns her head away so that I won't see her weakness. I feel a moment of empathy for my diabolical rival. We both share a common backstory, sad orphan girls who lived to see their family butchered. The only difference is I can change my story, but she has to live with hers forever.

"We can put an end to him," I promise Katherine. She stares at me skeptically. After 500 years of hating Klaus, she finally has a chance to stop him and her trust issues are getting in the way. In order to gain her confidence, I try opening up to the last woman on the planet that I want to talk to. "I may hate you for what you did to Damon and Stefan, but I do pity you, because I know what it's like to lose everything too," I admit miserably looking Katherine dead in the eyes. She doesn't need to ask any questions to put the pieces together. I need only issue one more warning to seal Katherine's compliance. "If you ever think of betraying me, remember this, Klaus knows nothing of forgiveness or honor. He will drag out your life so painfully; you will wish he had sacrificed you," I caution. Katherine's head nods in acceptance, and I know that I have her on my side.

"So I assume you called this meeting because you need something," Katherine speculates. "What exactly is my role in this little revenge scheme," she questions once again feigning indifference.

"You are going to make contact with a vampire in Richmond named Slater who is going to contact Elijah and set up a meeting." Katherine stops dead in her tracks once I name drop Elijah. Few times have I ever seen Katherine truly terrified, and I try to savor the moment. Turning the tables on her is quite satisfying. She has no idea that Elijah was in love with her, and after her remark about Caroline, I choose to keep the information to myself. Little fear never hurt anyone.

"Elijah and I have a complicated history," Katherine admits carefully. "Since I value my life, I think I'm gonna sit this one out. Why don't you talk to Damon? I'm sure he would love to drive for hours alone in the car with you," she teases relentlessly.

I feel a wave of protectiveness and a little bit of jealousy after Damon's confession at the hospital. "Leave Damon out of this," I shout. "If you do anything to hurt him, I will destroy you," I threaten. Without realizing it, I start shoving Katherine trying to release some of my anger, but this time she is prepared for me. She uses her vampire strength to flip me over onto the ground, and my head hits hard on impact.

I feel everything spinning and a massive headache coming on. Katherine offers me a hand in getting up, but I knock it away. She ignores my resistance to her help and issues a warning of her own. "Don't make the mistake of thinking that you control me," Katherine cautions. "I am over 500 years old, and I could snap you like a twig. Damon and Stefan were mine. I made them, and if you know what's good for you, you'll dump your little boyfriend and give me what I want," Katherine snaps menacingly at me.

"Stefan was always part of the deal," I remind Katherine. "The shelf life of my relationship with Stefan is quickly approaching its expiration date. Guilt over his future mistakes will consume him, and he will dump me to protect me, as warped as that logic is," I explain.

"Ah, see now we're getting somewhere. I was wondering why you were so quick to sacrifice the man that you love to the big bad. Tell me, why be so protective of Damon and not Stefan. It's not just about some mysterious mistake," Katherine fishes for more information.

"You're right," I admit without hesitation. "The truth is Stefan is better off with you, and Damon is better off without you." My anger is building quickly, and I know it isn't all directed at Katherine. For months, I took Damon for granted, and it is a little hypocritical for me to yell at her for doing the same. Honestly I wasn't sure if I was shouting at her or my past self, but it didn't matter because I needed to say it either way. "Damon loved you and accepted you just as you were," I confess simply. I swear I can see her flinch as I confront her, but I can't be sure. "He searched for you for 145 years. At any point, you could have found him and told him the truth. He would have followed you to the ends of the Earth and loved you for the rest of eternity. Why wasn't that enough," I scream loudly? A few passing townsfolk start staring.

Katherine looks vulnerable for a moment, almost human. I felt the shame of hurting Damon once, so I recognize it easily in someone else. "It was because he accepted me," Katherine admits. "Whatever you may think of me, I loved Damon, and I always will. But the night Stefan and Damon died, when I saw their lifeless bodies lying in the middle of the road, I suddenly had such clarity. I could never choose between them while they were alive, but the shock of their deaths gave me my answer. Stefan could never accept me as a monster. He wanted me to be better. He wanted me to be more. It made me want more for myself. Damon loved me just as I was, and how could I accept that love when I couldn't even accept myself? You're right. I ruined Damon's life. I have done terrible things to more people than I care to count, but what I did to Damon was the worst. My guilt won't wash away his pain, which is why I avoid dwelling on it," Katherine confesses ashamed.

"You have to let him go," I tell her stating the obvious. "It's the only way he can be free of you."

"I know," Katherine whispers quietly to herself. She sits in uncharacteristic silence for a moment while I regain my train of thought.

I remind myself of the task at hand and what I need from Katherine. "You also have to go to Richmond," I order. "Elijah is a man of honor, and if he promises you a pardon in exchange for my location, he means it. I also want you to secure a pardon for Rose and Trevor. They shouldn't have to run forever paying for your betrayal. Slater should be able to get them a message letting them know they're safe."

"You just got the whole life story didn't you," Katherine concludes?

"I got enough, just enough to know that you convinced Mason Lockwood to come to town with you. If you want our partnership to continue, you will send him packing. He tried to kill Stefan and Damon in my time, and he is Tyler's uncle. I don't want anyone else messed up in all of this," I finish.

She doesn't even question how I know about Mason, nor does she fight me about sending him away. "I suppose I can agree to those terms as long as you hold up your end of the bargain with Stefan," Katherine decides.

"Don't worry. I have already started planting the seeds of trust in his head," I promise.

"How did you do that" Katherine questions once again skeptical?

"I told him the truth of how you helped him fight for his humanity," I state sincerely.

Katherine looks briefly impressed either at me for telling Stefan the truth or at herself for actually doing the right thing for once. She was right. Stefan does push her to be better, and as screwed up as it is, she does the same for him. "Talk to Stefan before you leave," I advise. "Fill him in as a way to earn his trust, and apologize for what you did to him and to Damon. Trust and loyalty are important to Stefan. If you seem worthy of his trust, it will go a long way. Also don't be scared to let him in, believe me you'll regret it if you don't" I warn. "The rest is up to you," I say as I stand up and walk away. I check the phone that Damon picked up for me this morning, and I see six text messages all from the same person, me. After reading between the lines of the texts, I guess that Stefan has broken up with her already, because all of her letters are capitalized. She seems pissed. I remind myself that I did all this for her own good, but I still feel a little guilty for being the cause of the breakup. Either way, it's time for us to talk one on one.

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	13. Chapter 13

**Okay, I know it has been forever since I updated, but it seems my muse has taken a hiatus along with the Vampire Diaries. I also know that I promised this chapter would be Delena heavy, and it is in a way. However, I decided to put the big Damon Elena part off till the next chapter. Thank you to all my readers who have stuck with me.**

I text my past self to meet me at our house. If she is going to yell at me, I'd rather not have a captive audience. When I walk into my room, I notice she's been crying. On instinct, I rush over to the bed and wrap my arms around myself. Her emotions must be contagious, because without understanding why, I join her in her quiet sobbing. It's the first time that we've been this close to each other, but it feels natural being there for her. Her pain is my fault, and soothing her feels like a form of repentance. She allows me this moment of comfort only until she feels the tears on her shoulder, and she realizes the sound of crying isn't just coming from her. She shrugs away from my embrace. She stares at me with such hatred, and I wonder if this counts as a form of self-loathing, or if she simply doesn't see herself in me. It would be understandable since every time that we're together it feels like a chasm separates us, a chasm created by my pain and loss. The girl I see before me is nothing like the woman that I know I've become.

An icy coldness fills her voice as she speaks to me. "I had a life before you showed up. It may not have been a normal life like I wanted, but I didn't ask to give it up. In less than two days, you've managed to destroy my relationship with Stefan. You manipulated Stefan and you manipulated me," Elena accuses. I'm sure she expects a denial or an apology or even shamed silence, but since I'm on an honesty kick, I decide to admit the simple truth.

"You're absolutely right. I did manipulate you and Stefan. It might not have been intentional, but subconsciously I have been sabotaging your relationship. But you need to know, it wasn't part of some elaborate plan," I reason calmly. Elena doesn't seem to be buying it, and I don't blame her. I did have a plan, a manipulative, calculated plan. Destroying their relationship was a big part of it, but somehow I sabotaged it without even trying. Nothing that I've done lately has been according to plan.

What happened today only proved my point that the relationship was doomed long before I showed up, and Elena needed to believe that to. It took me a long time to come to grips with why Stefan and I failed, but when I did that epiphany freed me. It released me from the guilt that his failings were somehow my fault, that if I had tried harder, that I could have saved him.

Elena needs some tough love, so I continue hopeful that my harsh tone might penetrate our thick skull and maybe bring us both some peace. "I did the apology thing," I state plainly. "All I have done since I got back is apologize to the people that I love." Images flash in my head of Jenna, Damon, and Caroline. I felt like I was always saying how sorry I was. I know now that I shouldn't have to apologize, especially not to myself. I struggle to connect with her hoping that it will make her understand. I take her hand and look her square in the eyes as I say, "You know better than anyone what it's like to always feel responsible for the bad things that happen."

I see a flash of something behind her eyes, maybe its empathy or acceptance, but it's gone in an instant. She's shutting me out, and she removes her hand from my grasp. So since emotional connecting isn't working, I decide to give brutal honesty a second try. "I'm done with apologies," I inform her coolly. "So here's the advice part of our little heart to heart. Get over it," I state plainly. Elena stares silently looking as I'm sure she feels hurt and angry. I know it hurts, because honesty always does, so I just continue piling on. "The man that you love broke your heart. It sucks, but you'll survive, and in the end it will make you stronger. One of these days you're gonna wake up, and you're gonna see that you are not defined by Stefan's weaknesses. You're gonna see that he's just a man, a flawed imperfect person just like the rest of us. He has a fatal flaw just like anyone, a flaw that defines him and strives to destroy him. That flaw is what destroyed my relationship with Stefan, not me. I won't apologize for that weakness, not anymore."

Elena doesn't say anything for a long while. She just stares off into space, until her next question breaks the silence. "What flaw," she manages to utter?

"Excuse me?"

"What flaw destroyed my relationship? I think you owe me that much."

"Guilt," I say simply. "Every hero has a fatal flaw and Stefan's is his guilt. It compels him to sacrifice his own happiness as a form of atonement. Stefan does love you, and he always will, but he doesn't feel that he deserves our love. What I told him about the future only confirmed his own insecurities," I convince Elena. By the look in her eyes, I know my words are having an impact. She might not want to believe it, but a small part of her realizes the truth in my words. Memories come rushing in of the times that Stefan has walked away from me all in the name of protecting me. It makes me feel stupid for not seeing it before.

My face softens a little as I see Elena is struggling to hold it together. Everything she knew has shifted under her feet in the course of two days. Elena is searching my face for some sign of my sincerity or possibly for some sign of herself. She needs a connection to hold onto, so I offer her something she will understand, empathy for Stefan. "For the record, I do want Stefan to find love and happiness in this life, and obviously since I'm you, I want the same for us both. Stefan and I shared an epic love once, but even the best of stories come to an end. Sometimes love isn't enough to overcome our inner demons. I'm truly sorry if I've caused you pain, but just so we're clear, if I had it to do all over, I wouldn't change a thing," I confess without a trace of my former guilt. Despite everything that I've said today, she still appears shocked by my admission.

She stares at me looking betrayed and lost. Her voice cracks barely above a whisper. I strain my ears to hear her words. "He told me what he did in your time. Stefan said that he was responsible for the brutal deaths of nearly everyone that I love. I understand what that must have done to you, but I can't just switch off my feelings for Stefan and transfer them to Damon, like you clearly want me to."

I interrupt her train of thought, because clearly we are having a miscommunication. "Whoa, whoa, whoa, wait, I would never ask that of you," I tell her.

Elena seems confused and she grows more frustrated by the minute. "Than what do you want from me, because I'm trying really hard to understand?" Her shoulders slump and she looks as if she's given up. This isn't how this was supposed to be. She needs to be stronger than this if she is to survive what's to come.

"I just want you to stop running," I say exasperated. "Stop running from the truth just because it's scary. Stefan will never trust himself to love you like you deserve, and Damon is a good man. Open your eyes to that and I will be happy. I don't need you to love Damon now. All I need is for you to open your heart to the possibility of him. He's gonna come by here tonight. He's gonna be broken and lost, a lot like you are now. Just let him in a little. You might realize that the two of you have a lot more in common than you think. Look into his beautiful blue eyes, and if you can't see all the love and adoration that I see in them every day, then you're right, we are nothing alike," I challenge.

She nods her head just a smidge, but I get the message all the same. I leave our room to give her some space, and to give me some space. As I sit alone on my couch, I try to piece together what I think will happen tonight. Assuming Katherine still intends to talk to Damon. He's gonna come here with a broken heart. This time it's going to be different. I am going to stay here to make sure that it's different. Jeremy and Jenna will also be elsewhere for the evening just in case my meddling goes awry. A part of me hopes that Damon would never do that to me, not after all that we've shared in the past two days, but the other part remembers the pain of watching my brother's neck snap at Damon's hand. I can't take any chances. It's time to write a new ending to this story. All I have to do is wait for my moment.

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	14. Chapter 14

**Okay, so once again I am a lying liar. I totally promised that this chapter would have Damon and Elena in it together. Unfortunately I plan out these chapters in my head, and in my head there are these little conversations that I don't think will warrant a whole chapter until I write it out. It then becomes much longer, and I realize I have to put off the idea I have for the next chapter. The good news is that I actually updated twice in 24 hours. My inspiration seems to be back once I finally got through the block caused by the last two chapters. I am hoping to be updating more often. I also want to give a special shout out to cdaye8184, coockiemonsterlove, and Jade2099 for always being so awesome and reviewing for like almost every crazy chapter that I publish. You guys are what keep me writing, so in case I don't say it enough. Thank you! I totally pinky promise with cherries on top that the next chapter will be Damon showing up in Elena's bedroom.**

Six hours I spend waiting. I watch events unfold like I'm watching a TV show about my life. Jenna, Jeremy, and other Elena get ready for the Mayor's wake. Elena doesn't say a word to me as she prepares to leave. All she gives me is a courtesy wave goodbye as she is walking out the door. Clearly she's not over it yet, but the wave and the absence of withering glares gives me hope. After a few hours, I get a mysterious text from Katherine. All it says is thanks for the advice. As I sit wondering what her cryptic message could possibly mean, my phone starts ringing with Stefan's name appearing on the caller ID.

I tentatively press the talk button, afraid of what new catastrophe awaits me on the other end. For once since I got back, I am pleasantly surprised. Stefan's voice breaks the silence, and he sounds different than I thought he would. I don't detect a trace of sadness or pain or guilt. He sounds bewildered but in a good way, if that makes any sense. "Katherine showed up at the wake," Stefan informs me before I can even muster a hello. Nightmare scenarios run through my mind of murder and mayhem, and I remember how the wake ended last time with Katherine skewering Stefan. Surely she could not be that stupid I hope. Luckily for both of us, Katherine is not nearly as stupid as she acts sometimes. "She apologized," Stefan chokes out, the emotion of that confession glaringly evident in those two simple words.

Thank God I think to myself. At least someone listens to me when I'm speaking. There might just be hope for Katherine yet. Stefan breaks me out of my inner monologue by sharing his own inner thoughts out loud. "She apologized for everything, for compelling me, for lying to me, for being with Damon and me at the same time, and for not coming back to me sooner," Stefan admits to me.

His voice sounds so distant to my ears. I don't know if he is even talking to me anymore, or if he simply needed someone to voice his thoughts to other than himself. "She told me that she never stopped loving me. I don't know what to believe anymore. A few days ago you and I were happy together and Katherine was a distant memory. Now I can't even look at you without hating myself, and Katherine returns professing her undying eternal love for me. The craziest part being that I think I believe her. How did this happen," he questions hopelessly, possibly not expecting me to answer?

I can't even imagine how overwhelming this must be for Stefan. The woman who he convinced himself never cared for him just apologized after 145 years of silence. I struggle to think of something to say, something comforting and wise. Stefan deserves it after the day that he has had. The only thing I come up with is a phrase that seems to be my new mantra in this time. "Maybe this is what was supposed to happen," I speculate, hoping that he finds this possibility reassuring. I try to paint a pretty picture of what could be, praying that the idea takes root in his mind. Judging by his tone, it won't take a lot. "Katherine loves you, and you don't have to feel guilty around her. Whatever you have done, you know she's done worse. Hell, she's done worse to you. Maybe she's here to make things right just like we all are. It's never too late for redemption or for forgiveness."

I expect him to thank me or tell me that I'm right or maybe not to say a word at all. What I don't expect is for his righteous anger to rear its ugly head. "It's that easy for you, letting go," he spits out bitterly. "After everything that we shared, you can still stand there and push me towards another woman. It may have been longer for you, but I just broke up with the woman that I love not even five hours ago. Don't mistake my confusion about my feelings as me moving on from that. Some of us need a little more time before we throw ourselves at someone else. Remind me again, are you doing this for me, or are you doing this so you feel less guilty when you're wrapped up in my brother's arms?"

Every nerve in my body is boiling with anger. I momentarily forget my promise to future Stefan, and all I see before me is the man who ruined my life. My voice raises several octaves until I am nearly screeching through the phone. "You're right. I had plenty of time to get over the pain of our breakup. You saw to that. I had plenty of time locked up in the psych ward to ponder my life choices and my deep seated feelings. In case you've forgotten, you're the one who decided to break up with her not me, so don't you dare try to make me feel guilty for your decisions. And how dare you bring your brother into this, Damon has nothing to do with our breakup."

At this point, my rage is at such a fever pitch, I am prepared to hit him where it hurts. I know it's childish, but I make a cheap shot that I know will shut Stefan up. "You're feeling angry and bitter and you're lashing out at the closest warm body. Now I finally see the family resemblance. The difference is Damon isn't usually such a judgmental ass when he yells at me, and when he does, I usually deserve it." The silence on the other end is deafening. It might have been a low blow comparing him to Damon in that way, but I was tired of being on the defensive about every move that I make or word that I say.

I attempt to tone down my anger after counting to ten and telling myself to breathe in and out. My voice no longer reeks of anger, just frustration and exhaustion. Despite my best efforts, I still come off as a raging bitch, and what's even worse is that I don't think that I care. "God, I am trying so hard here Stefan to be the bigger person. I am even trying to push you towards someone who could actually make you happy. But I feel like there are two versions of you, there is the version that can be sweet and understanding, and then there is the part that can be a self-righteous dick. Maybe I was wrong, Katherine can do better," I snidely remark before hanging up the phone.

**As Always Please Read and Review**


	15. Chapter 15

**I seriously feel proud of myself. Three updates in 36 hours and this one is actually long. I have wanted to write this scene practically since I started this story. It has just taken a lot to get there. I finally rewrote the bedroom scene from **_**The Return**_**. Yay, I finally kept my promise. I also wanted to mention that I get inspiration from a lot of sources, many of them other TV shows. Since I blatantly copied a couple of pieces of dialogue from other sources, I figured I should give credit where credit is due. But before I do that, I want to know if anyone can guess what part of the story I took from TV. Hint it is from two different TV shows, neither of which are the Vampire Diaries, even though I did copy dialogue from the show in this chapter. One is a new show and another is a very old TV show in its last season. I look forward to reading any guesses that you have, and I will announce what dialogue and where it came from in the next chapter.**

Almost two hours later, after I calm down and find my happy place again, I receive another cryptic text from Katherine. This one however needs no clarification. History has told me all I need to know. I see the words _I let him go_ flash across my phone, and my heart is conflicted between genuine relief and heart breaking sadness. This may go down as one of the worst days of Damon's life because of whatever Katherine said to him, but selfishly I'm glad that his heart may finally be free of her. I head up the stairs to prepare Elena for what she's about to see. Except for the night the tomb was opened and the days following it, the other me has never seen Damon truly vulnerable and heartbroken. This will be a bit of a shock, and Elena needs to react appropriately if she doesn't want to set Damon off. It won't be long before he appears drunk in my bedroom.

It feels strange knocking on my own door, but after our last conversation, it seems wrong somehow intruding in her private space, not to mention perilous to my health. After she grants me entrance, I use a white dish rag that I found in the kitchen to literally wave the white flag of surrender. Elena lets the tiniest smile break out, but I can tell she is fighting it. "Here I was afraid all of our angsty teenage melodrama had ruined our sense of humor for good. Glad to know you can still smile," I reply mirroring Elena's grin.

A joking attitude must be contagious, because Elena quickly fires back with a witty retort. "Well apparently tragedy has blessed us with a better sense of humor, because we're not known for being funny," Elena delivers the line with another smirk.

Her smile makes me hope that this moment never ends. This fun back and forth is about the most lighthearted thing I've done in too long. I want it to continue for a little while longer. Sadly, the only joke I can think of I stole from Damon. "You're not terribly unfunny Elena. You should give yourself more credit." I echo the same sentiment that Damon said to me too long ago to fathom.

Her grin has now spread throughout her face. She is no longer fighting me. Past me must remember the Georgia road trip as fondly as I do, because she says nostalgically, "You sound like Damon."

His name reminds me of why I came up here in the first place. All signs of my former happiness leave my face, and my tone becomes deadly serious. The shift in the air is unmistakable. I know Elena feels it too. "Which brings me to my point in coming up here," I tell her sadly. "Damon is coming over within the hour, and he is gonna be an absolute mess." Elena's face changes in an instant. My concern for Damon is clearly taking over, and I take it as a positive sign for our future that she is so worried.

Elena blatantly fishes for information when she asks me, "I take it Damon didn't text you about his impending breakdown?"

While I am careful to avoid any topics that involve Damon's attempted murder of my brother, I see no harm in letting her in a little. I should take the same advice I gave Katherine. A tiny nugget of honesty goes a long way. "I remember this day very well," I recount miserably. "Let's just say that I want to do things a little differently, be a better person, a lot of things."

She's kind enough not to question further. I suppose my cryptic comments have become an ordinary occurrence recently. Elena instead surprises me with an altogether different question. "What do you need me to do," she asks sincerely?

My own trust issues rise to the surface, and the irony that I do not trust myself is not lost on me. "You seem a lot more compliant than you were this afternoon," I observe suspiciously, while fishing for some information of my own.

She can see right through my act as I could her own. It is a lot easier to figuratively lie to myself than to literally lie to myself. Elena has a knowing smile, but luckily she doesn't appear offended at my lack of trust. "There doesn't seem to be any point in fighting you, and in spite of our differences, Damon is my friend. If he needs me, I want to be there for him."

I watch my past self truly impressed at the first show of maturity that I have seen from her in this time. Quickly, I give Elena the 411 on her role in mission 'Console Damon.' "When he first gets here, I want to talk to him first," I direct firmly. "I just need you to give us some space while I say my peace. After that, all he really needs is a friend. Just be sure not to push him away. He is in an emotionally delicate place right now, and he needs our compassion more than anything." I can still see skepticism in Elena's face as she wraps her brain around a fragile Damon. He has never acted anything other than invincible in front of other people. Only after we became closer friends, did he let me peer at what was behind his façade of cool arrogance. Her seeing his true face might compel her to open herself up to the possibility of someday with Damon. Before I allow myself to hope, I issue one last warning to Elena. "Damon may act strong and unbreakable, but his heart can crumble at the smallest rejection," I caution Elena.

"I believe you," Elena replies acceptingly.

"Believe her about what," a voice asks from the seat by my window? His jet black hair looks disheveled and his sluggish mannerisms reveal his obvious intoxication. His face reveals his obvious sorrow. My heart constricts in my chest at the sight. I never do answer Damon's question. Instead I instruct Elena to go downstairs and bring up some coffee. When we are alone, I sit next to him and drape my left arm around his shoulders. "Talk to me," I plead with Damon. He regards me skeptically, clearly fighting between letting his guard down and protecting himself.

His protective instincts win out, when he replies with sarcastic remark. "What's to talk about? My evil bitch of an ex apparently never loved me, and she chose Stefan, basically the recurring story of my life." Damon can blame it on his drunken state, but the emotional exhaustion of the day is catching up to him, and his mask of indifference is fading. He looks miserable, as if he's lost all hope and joy. His next words sound desperate and begging. I can't stop the tears from running down my face. "Is it so impossible for someone to love me? I can be the good guy. I can be the bad guy, but whatever I do, no one ever chooses me." He has no idea how wrong he is about that. You would think he hadn't heard a single word that I had said since I returned. I know I shouldn't blame him, when he is this upset, but I feel a little hurt that he feels that way.

What happens next is either an attempt to comfort Damon or me being defensive about his latest comment. I'm not sure which at the moment. "I did. I chose you. I was with Stefan for almost a year, and I still chose you," I remind Damon hoping that this will be the one truth that still matters.

His begging and desperation still hangs on his every word as he pleads with me to explain. "Why? Please, I need to know why?" This is the moment, the moment where I can help heal him or help destroy him. In that moment of time, I know exactly what to say. The words flow from my mouth just as air fills my lungs and my heart beats. It feels natural and right.

I grab his face in my hands and gaze lovingly into his deep blue eyes, and I say, "I chose you, because I love you, because no one else ever did, because you love your brother even though you'll never ever admit that, and because of a thousand little moments that define our life together. If I had to explain them all, my voice would give out before I was done, but if you need to know why I love you, I can go on all night." When I feel his lips on mine, I know that my words were enough. Damon might not be healed, but he wasn't broken anymore. I allow the kiss to continue for almost a minute. I pour everything I am into it, my love, my pain, my heart. All I have to give, I lay at his feet, and then I pull slightly away. Our faces are still inches from each other, but just as Damon is about to pull me in for another kiss, I place two fingers on his lips stopping him. It only takes a second for Damon's shields to go up. He has faced a mountain of rejection tonight, and he braces for another hit. "We can't do this right now," I reason cautiously.

"Why? You just said you loved me. You said you chose me. Why can't we be together," Damon questions angry and frustrated. We are treading on dangerous ground again. It feels as if his control is hanging off the edge of a cliff, so I proceed carefully in my explanation.

"Because you still haven't chosen me," I remind him gloomily. If I let you keep kissing me, and if this goes any further. You won't be thinking about me. You'll be using me as a replacement for her. Trust me when I say that I know what it feels like for you to truly love me and want me, and that kiss wasn't it. I want reality or nothing at all."

His anger evaporates into thin air. Damon knows I'm right, and with one last kiss to my forehead, he releases me, but not before whispering in my ear. "I will choose you one day, because being your friend feels more real than 145 of loving Katherine." My heart leaps in my chest at his words, and by the return of his arrogant smirk, I know he can tell. I finally look up and see a shocked mirror image of myself holding two cups of coffee and starring at the scene before her. I can't tell if this will help or hurt my cause in getting my past self together with Damon. I suppose it depends on how much she heard.

Once I regain my senses, I ask the question. "Out of curiosity, how long have you been eavesdropping?"

If she is still fazed by what she saw, she doesn't show it. Elena replies casually as if I had just asked her about the weather forecast. "Right around the time you started explaining why you chose Damon, so basically before you declared your love and you two started making out." Either this is some weird form of shock, or her tolerance for the abnormal has skyrocketed since I came back. "Care to elaborate about what just happened here," she questions still cool as a cucumber?

My supposed courage leaves me in an instant as Elena stares at me waiting patiently for an answer. I start stuttering and make a pathetic excuse to leave. "Uh, well you see, Damon explains this so much better than I do, so I'm just gonna be in Jeremy's room." I turn back to invite Damon to join me after he's done with his awkward heart to heart with Elena. I quickly grab an extra tank top and a pair of sleep shorts before exiting the room like a bat out of Hell. I rationalize that I left so Damon and the other me could have some alone time. They both need to get used to life without me. I won't be hanging around forever, and they must build their own memories instead of just living through mine. All of which was true, but it sounded more like an excuse than a real reason. I was just tired of explanations. I figure Damon can handle this one conversation.

After nearly half an hour of waiting on Damon, I peak my head in to our room, and the sight before me fills my heart with joy. Damon and Elena must have been exhausted after their little talk, because they are both lying on the bed fully clothed and fast asleep in each other's arms. Elena's head is resting on Damon's chest, and I notice her hand is intertwined with his. Neither Damon nor I have ever looked as peaceful as we do tonight, and I can see goofy grins on both their faces. They must be having happy dreams I conclude wishfully. I take one quick picture on my phone before gently closing the door and going to bed. I want to be in the other Elena's shoes for a moment just to feel Damon's protective arms around me, but I remember that I came here to fix her life, not mine, so I banish the selfish thought and drift off the sleep.

**As Always Please Read and Review**


	16. Chapter 16

**I had such a great reaction from the last chapter. I just couldn't help myself. I had to update again. Thank you to everyone who reviewed. I even got one person who spotted one of the quotes. Congrats vampchic281205. Nice to know there is at least 1 One Tree Hill fan among my readers. Just for the record the following quotes were directly copied and are not of my own creation: "but if you need to hear why I love you, I can go on all night" One Tree Hill 3x13 Lucas. The other one is more obscure, but a lot more recent. "I want reality or nothing" Once Upon a Time 1x13 Prince Charming. After reading through it again, I found another one "be a better person, a lot of things" Grey's Anatomy 3x04 Addison. Anyways here is my next chapter, and I hope that you all enjoy.**

Sunlight streams through Jeremy's window and wakes me from the first peaceful night sleep I've had in months. I strain my ears to listen for any signs of life in my otherwise quiet house. When I don't hear any, I assume Damon and other Elena are still sleeping. I don't have the heart to wake them. Instead I head downstairs and start the coffee maker. We all could use a little caffeine pick me up after the past couple days.

Before I have time to enjoy my freshly brewed cup of coffee, my phone is buzzing with another text from Katherine _Meeting with Elijah at your house 8 p.m. tonight_. I text back letting her know that I got the message, and hear someone knocking at the door. As I walk to the other end of the house, I run through who could possibly be coming over this early in the morning. Since my luck as of late has royally sucked, the person at my door is of course the last man on Earth I want to see. I would have preferred Klaus. "And my morning was starting out so well," I sarcastically inform a guilty looking Stefan. He's staring at me obviously struggling for what to say after being the world's biggest jackass yesterday.

Feeling in no mood to help him out of his apparent awkwardness, I simply stand there glaring daggers at Stefan until he finds the words to speak. "Can I talk to you," Stefan questions uncertainly?

"I suppose that depends. Am I talking to Dr. Jekyll or Mr. Hyde," I ask attempting to mimic cool detachment? I don't want Stefan to think for a moment that he has power over me.

Stefan lets out a humorless laugh at my not so subtle dig. "I suppose I deserve that," Stefan concedes. "For the record, Dr. Jekyll would like to make an apology if you'll let him." My first impulse is to slam the door in his face, but seeing as how I am going to have to work with Stefan to take down Klaus, I opt to allow him in to hear what he has to say. Worst case scenario, now that he's in front of me, I could just stab him again. The thought brings me more joy than it should, I think devilishly.

Meanwhile, Stefan takes a seat on my couch, and I choose to stand in front of him with my arms crossed. Stefan appears uneasy, continually shifting in his seat, which is the exact effect I was hoping for. I may have let him in, but I never said I would make this easy. My voice is razor sharp when I tell him, "You've got five minutes, and that time gets cut in half the second I detect jealousy, anger, or judgment in your voice. Am I making myself clear?"

Stefan nods his consent, and starts speaking quickly as if I was staring at my watch to call time on his apology. "Crystal, and since I only have five minutes, I should probably lead with I'm sorry for being a hypercritical prick yesterday," Stefan apologizes swiftly. He slows down a lot after that, either because he can't keep up the pace or he is worried his message is getting lost. Stefan oozes sincerity, and I realize I am definitely talking to Dr. Jekyll. "You were right. It wasn't my place to judge you."

I relax the tiniest bit as I agree with him. "No, it wasn't," I concur softly.

"I wish I had a better excuse for my callousness, but my only reason is human weakness."

It's ironic because that pretty much sums up our entire relationship in a nutshell or at least the end of it, Stefan's weakness, Stefan's failings, Stefan's flaws. It's hard not to resent him even after all this time. I realize that Stefan is still in the middle of his little speech, so I decide to tune back in. "Shame and guilt can't begin to cover how I felt when you told me what I'd done. For the first time in a long while, I was tempted to turn it off, flip the switch, and never look back. Instead, I settled on taking my pain out on you, and that wasn't fair. I'm sorry." He meant it, anyone with eyes or ears could tell that he meant it, but I just had to decide if it was enough.

Stefan just sits still as a statue while I digest everything he said, and a part of me still wants to be so mad at him, but the bigger part realizes that would make me a hypocrite. One of the reasons that Stefan and I started a relationship was because we were so similar, and I am ashamed to admit we share many of the same failings. Stefan was apologizing for taking his guilt and pain out someone who was trying to help him, but how many times had I done that to Damon. During the whole Klaus ordeal, I used him as a punching bag, sometimes literally. Memories come flooding in of me trying to hit him at Slater's house and me fighting against Damon to run into the tomb with Stefan and Katherine, to say nothing of our countless arguments where I simply yelled at him to make myself feel better. I couldn't stay mad at Stefan, because I was no different once.

"You're forgiven," I state despondently, turning away so he doesn't see my tears. "Your punishment is to just live with it. It's not easy, trust me," I tell Stefan guiltily.

When I turn back around, Stefan looks genuinely surprised. I imagine when he played all the scenarios out in his head, he thought probability was heavily weighted towards me throwing him out or punching him. Stefan doesn't appear satisfied with being let off the hook so easily. With Stefan, things can never be simple. He jumps up and pleads with me. "Please, there has to be something I can do to make things right. I don't deserve your forgiveness after one apology. How about I help you with your plan? Killing Klaus can't be just a one woman operation. Put me to work. Just tell me what I can do for you."

His insistence to fix things should make me happier, but Stefan still doesn't get it. If my story yesterday should have taught him anything, it is that I am not the one he needs to make things right with. I'm not the only one he let down. With that in mind, I finally think of something Stefan can do. "You can be a better brother," I state simply. "That's what you can do for me," I say looking him dead in the eyes.

Stefan stares back confused at my sudden change in topic. "What do you mean," he asks dumbly?

"Do you know what happened to Damon last night? Did you ever wonder where he was when he didn't come home," I question?

Stefan looks back and explains in a condescending tone, "Elena, I know this might be difficult to understand, but Damon and I don't keep track of each other like that. We're vampires not children. We both come and go as we please. It's just habit." I would believe that a lot more if I didn't have evidence to the contrary. What Stefan means is that he doesn't keep track of Damon like that.

Whenever I feel protective of Damon, I start fuming with anger and tend to yell. This was no exception. "Really, because when you were kidnapped by Frederick, it didn't even take him two hours to grow worried and come looking for you. Damon was gone over twelve, yet when you saw me, you never once asked if I had seen him. He came over here drunk and heartbroken after Katherine told him that she never loved him and that it was always you. You're his brother and he needed you. Once again you weren't there for him. I shouldn't be surprised, since it seems to be the story of your relationship. Damon cares about you, but you treat him like he is a nuisance in your life. God, I can't believe I didn't see it sooner. You were always telling me what a terrible person Damon was, but do you realize he never said that about you. Hell, most of the time, he was even defending you. In the future, he walked away from being with me for you. He died for you. Damon sat up in my room last night feeling like he was never good enough. That feeling doesn't just come from Katherine or your Father's disapproval. It comes from your own. If you want to feel guilty about something feel guilty about that," I challenge spitefully.

There are few times that I have ever seen Stefan cry. I guess after 145 years as a vampire, you learn to reel in your emotions, but after my little outburst, Stefan clearly had lost all control of his own. The footsteps on the stairs signal that my plan to let Damon and Elena sleep might have been derailed by my early morning screaming. They both walk into the living room unsure of what to say. They both probably heard everything. I know with Damon's vampire hearing he certainly did. Stefan and Damon lock eyes for a moment, and Stefan tries to pour all his regret into that one glance. When he can't take the intensity of his guilt any long, he uses his vampire speed to leave without a word. The three of us are left speechless unsure about what to say. Simple words can't fix this.

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	17. Chapter 17

**Okay, so before I get to the next chapter there are a few things I need to say. First off, a huge thank you goes out to Jadedlily1478 for helping me through my little writer's crisis. Also thank you to all of my faithful reviewers who provide me with such inspiration. Also, you might notice that this chapter has a point of view change. I know this might be strange after 16 chapters from Future Elena's perspective, but I think I need to show Damon's perspective if I want to show the love story develop with him and Current Elena. I am trying this out to see how it works. I would really LOVE some feedback on this chapter, because I have never felt as confident in writing from Damon's perspective. So please if it seems out of character, tell me so. If this POV change goes well, I may try changing it to Current Elena's POV as well. Starting with this chapter, I will have the POV posted at the top of each chapter. I hope you enjoy.**

Damon's POV

Surreal doesn't even begin to cover the weirdness that has consumed my past few days. To recap, the woman that I loved for almost a century and a half came back only to rip out the remains of my broken heart. A future version of Elena came back in time to tell me that she loved me and that her future included my brutal demise. And to top it all off, current Elena was back on the market after a crushing rejection from my brother. All the women in my life are making my head spin. No one more than the two matching beauties standing in front of me. Even looking at their identical shocked faces, it is still difficult to see the future and the current Elena as one person. They both are so dissimilar, more like sisters than copies of the same human being.

My relationships with both also hold vastly differing meanings to me. With future Elena, it is about an undeniable craving and fire that threatens to consume us both. Our time is spent in passionate embraces and fiery kisses that make my heart feel like it can beat again. It is as if any moment could be our last, and we both need just one more second in each other's arms before we meet our tragic end.

With current Elena, it is about longing and a more simmering passion that lurks just beneath the surface. Every accidental touch or pining glare holds such significance. I spend the majority of my days analyzing every word like I am still a love struck teenager. Given my track record for unrequited love, I may never have stopped being a love struck teenager. No amount of time seems capable of changing that. All I know for certain is that with every passing day, I fall deeper for them, both of them. In other words, I am totally and completely screwed. Decades of therapy could not erase the fucked up shit going on in my life at present. The only certainty that still burns in my heart is an emotion I had thought died out the night the tomb was opened, hope.

It has been too long since I'd dared to hope things, dared to hope that my life could be different. From the second future Elena kissed me back at the hospital, that hope reignited into an inferno. She picked me over Stefan. Someone finally chose me. Even though it wasn't who I had hoped, that acceptance was something that no one could ever take away.

This thought however brings me back to memories of my conversation with Katherine. A part of me knows that it was weak to throw myself at her again, especially after what Elena and I had shared in the past couple of days, but Katherine was my first love. She held a power over me that couldn't be broken even after 145 years of separation. Memories of the past year that Elena spent head over heels in love with Stefan might have further exacerbated my fears about trusting this new relationship. But whatever fears I once held, they all vanished when I heard Elena's rather loud defense of my honor. She spoke of me which such reverence and love. It seemed ridiculous that I could have questioned her devotion for even an instant. Future Elena loved me. That much was undeniable, but I still had to work out my own feelings, and decide how I was going to juggle loving both Elenas. What would even happen to future Elena once she fixed everything? I never even thought to ask. I try to break myself out of my deep philosophical ponderings as I realize no one has spoken since Stefan left.

Five painfully long minutes pass without any of us uttering a word. The silence is anything but comfortable, and I struggle to come up with a witty quip to break the ice. "I never thought I'd live to see the day that someone could make my already morose brother even broodier, but somehow you managed it," I awkwardly joke, plastering my signature smirk on my face to really sell it. This earns me a smile and a small chuckle from future Elena, but current Elena clearly is not amused. She is once again glaring daggers at her future self. Apparently she is not as impressed by Elena's little speech as I was.

Her rage starts to spill over until she erupts in a volcano of self-righteous loathing directed at her future self. "Did you really need to pile on," Elena questions angrily? "He came here to apologize and you responded by screaming at him. God, every time I think I see a little bit of myself in you, something happens, and you prove that we are nothing alike."

Future Elena doesn't get defensive or start screaming back. She maintains an eerie calm as she asks her past self one question. "Was I wrong," Elena questions curiously?

"Excuse me," current Elena responds clearly confused?

Future Elena keeps her calm composure as she elaborates. "Did I make some factual error in what I was saying to Stefan? If you can tell me one thing that I said that wasn't true, I will go right now and beg Stefan's forgiveness. If you can't think of anything, then I have nothing to feel guilty about," Future Elena logically concludes.

I search my own mind for any tiny mistake that she might have made, anything that would force Elena to find my guilt ridden brother and relieve him of his heavy burden. The big brother in me hopes she comes up with something, because the heart wrenching look on Stefan's face as he left actually made me feel guilty for some inexplicable reason, as if I was to blame for his suffering. However, the selfish part of me hopes current Elena can see the truth in the accusations thrown at Stefan's feet. It would be a small vindication that even Elena's current self sees through Stefan's façade as the perfect noble brother.

While Elena fails to find any fault in her future self's reasoning, she refuses to lose this argument without a greater fight. "Just because something's true doesn't mean it needs to be said. It certainly doesn't need to be shouted. Stefan is fragile enough right now. Was it really necessary to add to his pain," Elena demands emitting a combination of judgment, sadness, and irritation in every word?

Before I know what's happening, unexpected words gush from my mouth without my consent. "Elena's right," I admit not really thinking about how confusing my statement might be. Both Elenas stare at me trying to decipher which side I had taken in their little argument. They keep pointing at each other and themselves hoping for further clarification. I curse my impulsive nature and my inability to keep my mouth shut. Without considering the consequences, I placed myself in a lose-lose situation. No matter whose side I took, the other Elena would feel angry and hurt that I didn't agree with her point of view.

Since I can't take the words back, I decide to explain, hoping it will free me from the hot water I foolishly jumped head first into. "You shouldn't have yelled at Stefan," I confess, observing Elena's face for a reaction. Predictably, her face falls a little and her shoulders slump. I feel terrible for hurting her feelings. She spent the past several days defending me, and at my first opportunity to return the favor, I don't back her up. It isn't because I'm ungrateful, but what Elena did went too far, and she needed me to tell her that. "Regardless of whatever facts are on your side, your little rant had little to do with me. You've been punishing Stefan ever since you returned, and today you seized an opportunity to unleash a cathartic explosion of hurt feelings and blame at his feet. You are a better person than that," I reassure her.

Elena stares down at her feet looking more like a guilty child facing reprimand than the strong grown woman I know she is inside. The only upside of this little argument is that current Elena smiles at me noticeably grateful for seeing her side of things. She mouths a thank you and kisses me on the cheek. It seems silly feeling excited about a kiss on the cheek when I have done a lot more with future Elena. But I still feel the familiar tingling sensation where her lips once were, and my breath catches in my throat as her gaze lingers for longer than it probably should.

We barely notice that future Elena is speaking until I hear the words, "you're right," pass through Elena's lips. She concedes and says, "I'll try to talk to Stefan today and apologize, on one condition," Elena stipulates with a downright diabolical grin gracing her lovely features. All evidence of her previous guilt vanishes.

Current Elena groans slightly annoyed that the promise of an apology comes with strings. "What condition," Elena questions aggravated?

The evil smirk hasn't left future Elena's face, and it's starting to get creepy. Her playful tone as she answers only adds to the effect. "You two have to go to the carnival together, tonight."

I'm torn between being terrified and turned on at this new side of Elena. Her plan is masterfully executed and brilliantly manipulative. Current Elena is far too tender hearted to let Stefan suffer when she is offered a chance to help him. After a beat, current Elena questions the nature of our little outing. "You're setting me and Damon up on a date? That is your condition," Elena asks in disbelief? I feel a tiny stab of rejection at the tone of her voice. You would think Elena asked her to walk across hot coals or eat a bug by the horror in her tone.

Future Elena puts on her best angelic doe eyed look before she replies in a faux innocent voice. "Of course not, that would be so inconsiderate after your boyfriend just broke up with you. You guys are going as friends. Damon will be a great buffer for all of your school friends who will ask a million stupid questions about your relationship status. There isn't a problem is there? Aren't you guys friends?"

"Yes," Elena and I quickly respond in unison. One look at either of our faces would make the most trusting person skeptical of the sincerity of our previous words, but future Elena doesn't question it.

Her smile only gets wider as she claps her hands together and excitedly exclaims, "Perfect, you two will have so much fun. Meet her at the carnival at 7. She has to help set up with Bonnie," Elena informs me happily. I struggle not to laugh as Elena sighs a doubtful "fine" under her breath and trudges up the stairs.

Once current Elena is out of sight and ear shot, I accuse her future counterpart of mischief in orchestrating this setup. "You did that on purpose," I suggest.

She produces a coy smile, "maybe," she replies while swaying playfully from side to side.

My suspicions are quickly confirmed, but I wonder why she simply didn't ask me herself. I know she wants me to fall for her past self, but I hate the thought of her sitting alone, while everyone else is having fun tonight. "What may I ask are your plans for this evening, since you obviously cannot attend the carnival yourself without raising a few eyebrows," I ask concerned.

"Don't you worry about me. I am spending the evening with a perfect gentleman. We will have tea and talk about old times. It will be delightful," Elena responds as if she is not baiting me.

Under normal circumstances, I would fall for her trap easily, but I have seen today that she likes to watch me squirm. I resolve not to give her the satisfaction. I nonchalantly question, "Should I be worried that you've grown tired of me already?" While I try to keep the edge of fear out of my voice, I fear I'm only moderately successful.

Apparently she has grown rapidly tired of this little game or she has taken pity on me, because she puts my insecurities for bed as quickly as they appeared. "He's just an old friend," she promises as her hand comes up to caress my cheek. "I need him to help me take down Klaus, and don't worry about my safety, because he will be doing most of the work," Elena swears. This woman knows me too well I think to myself. She recognizes exactly what I need to hear to feel secure. Her next assurances are just further proof of that fact. "Just in case you need any further reassurances, there was nothing romantic between us ever," Elena tells me definitively. I feel so much better until she adds one last comment before racing out the door. "He learned his lesson about falling for Petrova doppelgangers 500 years ago," Elena replies half-jokingly. It's the half part that worries me. Before I have a chance to ask any more questions, Elena mumbles some pathetic excuse to leave, and I am left again confounded by these crazy women who keep complicating my life.

**As Always Please Read and Review! Pretty, Pretty Please With Cherries On Top, At Least For This Chapter!**


	18. Chapter 18

**Okay, so I got a fairly good response from the last chapter in Damon's POV, so I decided to branch out and cover the crazy stuff going on in current Elena's head. Let me know if it seems out of character, because constructive criticism goes a long way. I am still trying to figure out what tweaks I need to make when writing Damon's character, because I still don't feel comfortable writing him with all his snarkiness. This is sort of a filler chapter just meant to show current Elena's mental state. The next chapter is the much anticipated Elijah chapter, which I am looking forward to writing, because I love Elijah so much. After that will be the 'date.' Thank you to the people who consistently review my story. It means a lot. **

Current Elena's POV

I toss outfit after outfit carelessly behind me until the pile on my bed holds every article of clothing that I own. Huffing in frustration, I throw myself onto the pile hoping the perfect outfit for my non-date with Damon miraculously appears in front of me. This is stupid. I should not be freaking out over what to wear for Damon. Damon has seen me in my pajamas for Christ sakes, and besides this is not a date. There is nothing to be worried about I repeat in my head. Two friends can go together to a carnival without it being weird, even if one of those friends might have feelings for the other friend, and even if one of those friends might recently have been dumped by her boyfriend. Everything will be fine, so what if my future self is in love with Damon, so what if Damon knows that, and so what if my heart beats faster when he's around, tonight will be a fun evening between two platonic friends, I tell myself unconvincingly.

Even in my head, this sounds lame. I allow myself the tiniest scream into my pillow to vent my frustration, and afterwards I throw it behind me and start muttering to myself. "Stupid, evil, manipulative, out to ruin my life. . . ." Before I can finish my little tirade about my future self, she walks through the door like she owns the place, which I guess she technically does, but that's beside the point. In her hands are bags filled to the brim with clothes.

"Relax, your clothing emergency is over. I figured since I got you into this I should at least supply your wardrobe for the evening, so you can stop obsessing over what to wear," she states with an air of cool confidence.

"I was not obsessing over my outfit, because this is not a date," I defiantly claim. My voice sounds a lot shriller than I would like, but I try to look firm and resolute. She takes one look around the room and the mess speaks for itself. My lie is quickly discovered, and my future self lets out a small chuckle at my expense.

"If that's your story," she states smugly. "Either way, I brought several options for you to choose from."

While I'm tempted to deny her offer of help, the clothes peeking out from her bags look too cute. The inner girl in me gives a silent squeal of delight and snatches the bag from my future self's hands. All the items she picked out are different from my typical jeans and solid color shirt combo. Most of the tops are low cut, tight, and practically sparkling. The pants are all a variation on a theme, snug fitting skinny jeans that show off all the right curves. As good as I look in all her choices, they just aren't me. I never dressed like this for actual dates, let alone non-dates. Before I give up completely, I find a simple white dress at the bottom of one of the bags. There are no sparkles, no flashy colors; it is a plain white dress with a green sash tied at the waist to add a splash of color. As I pick it up, Elena holds up a pair of dark green heels that match perfectly with the dress, as if she knew I would choose it all along.

I manage to mumble a small thank you before Elena leaves the room to let me change. When my hair is just right and the outfit is complete, I descend down the stairs to gauge Elena's reaction. I may still be mad at her for this forced setup, but she is currently the only female in the house, and I desperately need another woman's opinion. Her face shines with awe and pride as I come into view. It almost feels like having a big sister getting me ready for a big date, which this is not, I quickly remind myself.

"You look beautiful," she compliments softly.

"Are you sure that it's not too much? I mean it is only a school carnival. Why couldn't I just wear. . ."

"Stop it. You look perfect," she insists strongly. Her hands rest on my shoulders staring me down until I relent. She spends a couple moments fixing my bow and straightening out my dress before she gives me final approval.

As she's primping me, the same nagging thought keeps invading my brain. It has been bugging me ever since future me suggested this cockamamie idea. "What do you want from me," I ask plainly?

"What do you mean," she responds, clearly confused at my nature of my question?

"Stefan broke up with me only 24 hours ago and now you're setting me up with his brother. What do you expect to gain from this? What do you really want," I beg desperately?

Her face softens as she hears the pleading in my tone, and she leans on the back of the couch for support. "I want you to have fun," she says simply. There seems to be more to her story, so I let her continue without commenting. "Let's face it your life has royally sucked lately." Understatement of the century, I think to myself. "A lot of that is because of my sudden arrival." Correction, that was the understatement of the century. I keep wanting to be so mad at her, but every time I am, she goes and says something kind and sincere that makes me reconsider. It's stupid to trust her after all of her manipulations, but something inside of me compels me to have faith in her intentions. Her next suggestions for the evening actually leave me feeling excited for the first time about the carnival.

She speaks with such authority that it becomes impossible not to believe her. "For one evening you deserve to take a time out from your problems, think of it like a night pass from reality. Put your worrying brain aside for one night and enjoy a few hours of harmless fun with a friend who cares about you. Luckily, Damon has a special talent for making the most tragic of circumstances seem miles away. He can make you laugh and smile. This isn't some elaborate ploy to make you fall for Damon. I trust that will happen in its own time. Tonight is about you, so don't overthink it," she requests pleadingly.

"I can try, but no promises," I concede smiling genuinely. The strangest urge takes hold of me and I pull my future self into a hug. "Thank you," I whisper not really knowing what I am even thanking her for.

"You're welcome," she replies before reminding me that being late to a Caroline planned event will mean certain death, especially with her new vampire emotions adding to her neurosis. I walk out the door taking a few calming breaths and repeating my new mantra in my head. This is not a date. This is not a date.

**As Always Please Read and Review**


	19. Chapter 19

**Only one day left till the new episode! Thank God! Here is the much anticipated Elijah chapter. I made it a little longer to make up for my very short last chapter, and because I had a lot to cover. I added a little cliffhanger at the end, just because I am evil. I hope to have the next chapter up by the end of the week, so I won't let you suffer for too long. Thanks again to all my faithful reviewers, and here is chapter 19.**

Future Elena's POV

After sending my past self off for her non-date with Damon, I resume my own preparation for the evening. I do some light cleaning, prepare some chamomile tea, and I let out a tiny smile when I hear the light courteous knock on the door. Only Elijah could make knocking sound proper and polite.

When I open the door, Elijah stands calmly looking just the way that I remember him. He is dressed in an impeccable suit with the same commanding presence he had the first time we met. His voice still sounds smooth like silk to my ears as he speaks. "Good evening Miss Gilbert. I believe you requested a meeting," Elijah delivers the line with all the grace of a proper gentleman.

"Yes, please come in. I have been looking forward to this meeting," I state with a huge smile on my face.

Elijah just stares perplexed, probably since this is not the greeting a 1000 year old vampire is accustomed to. His leg moves cautiously through the invisible barrier with ease, and I direct him to the kitchen where I laid out my mother's good tea set. I thought Elijah would appreciate the gesture and the civilized nature of our meeting. Before he has time to take a seat at the table, I reach over and give him a big hug that clearly makes him uncomfortable. Elijah awkwardly pats my back mumbling something ridiculous like there, there, as if I am upset. I happily peer up at his face, and he can tell instantly that my emotional outburst was not due to sadness or grief, and he once again resumes his puzzled staring, still trying to figure me out. I speak trying to clear up his confusion. "In case I didn't say it before, it is really good to see you again."

"You are a most curious creature Miss Gilbert," Elijah states somewhat amused at my behavior.

"Please call me Elena," I request sweetly. It feels too weird having Elijah speak to me so formally after all that we have shared.

Luckily, Elijah seems pleased to drop the formalities and continue. "Alright, Elena it is then. So tell me Elena, I don't keep current on the present trends of teenage youth, so is it customary for today's youth to hug strangers in greeting?"

I let out an unavoidable laugh at Elijah's confusion. Its times like this I am reminded of how old Elijah truly is. Within five minutes, anyone could tell that he belongs to another time, a simpler time with codes of honor and loyalty. I almost wish that I could have known him then, lived in his simpler world. After my laughing subsides, I finally answer his question. "No, but it is customary to hug old friends."

Elijah appears to digest my words, and I think he gets stuck on the word friend. I don't know if Elijah has had a friend in over 1000 years, and he clearly doesn't remember the concept. "Forgive me for my lack of trust, but what proof can you offer of our supposed friendship. Can I trust you?"

Once again I erupt in a fit of laughter. Clearly, Elijah is growing weary of being laughed at, and his cool exterior breaks a little when he demands and explanation. "What might I ask is so funny?"

I regain control of my bodily impulses once more, and I nostalgically speak of times long since passed. "You asked me that very same question a long time ago. You won't remember any of this, but we both share a trusting bond with each other in my future." I want Elijah to believe me, but I was the one who once said that trust was earned, and within five minutes, I was demanding that Elijah hand it over.

Elijah thinks for a few moments until he devises a solution for our trust problem. "Ah, yes the mysterious future. Katerina did fill in a few details about that. So if we were such close friends in your time, tell me something, anything personal that I wouldn't confide in a stranger." There are so many stories that come to my mind, but I needed one that is deeply personal. I hesitate before retelling the most heartbreaking story Elijah ever shared with me.

With a heavy heart, I tell Elijah, "You told me the story of the girl you loved, the one that died." For a second, I detect unbearable pain reaching the features on his face, but he recovers quickly. He tries to imitate an air of skepticism, but I see right through it. Memories from a millennia ago flood his troubled mind.

He still manages to find a reasonable rationalization not to believe me. "I'm a thousand year old vampire. It would be a lucky guess to say that I loved someone once who died. If you know me so well, I must have told you more about her," Elijah challenges, though I'm not sure he wants me to answer.

As I recount the story, Elijah's gaze appears further and further away, as if he is reliving it as the words come out. "The first day you laid eyes on Tatia you were gathering water for your family. You said when your eyes connected for the first time, you forgot how to breathe, and she gave you the tiniest wave before running back to the village. After that, you told me about your ever growing feud with Klaus over her affections, and how it tore all three of you apart. Then you told me about your mother using Tatia's blood to turn your family into vampires. You said you never really forgave her for taking Tatia away from you, but you feigned indifference so you could mend fences with your brother. Centuries later when you saw Katherine, the living embodiment of everything that Tatia was, you fell for her too, and you were reminded of the cruel sting of heartbreak when she ran out of your life."

Elijah just sits in his seat speechless at my rendition of the most painful moments of his eternal life. His next words are plagued with sadness, regret, and grief. "That was a very long time ago," Elijah utters. "But for what it's worth, I believe you." Elijah rapidly suppresses his emotions until they are but a distant memory. He politely questions, "Since you are the one who called this meeting, what is it that I can help you with my dear?"

"I want Klaus dead, and I want your help to do it," I strongly plead.

Elijah still has a million questions, and I can't blame him. This is anything but a typical situation, even for vampires. Elijah struggles to make sense of it all, while still fishing for information. "I know why I want my brother dead, but the question is why you do? Judging by your strong reaction, I suppose this is about more than just self-preservation." He's right, of course he's right. Ever since this all started, it was never about my survival. It was always about theirs.

There is only one thing that Elijah will understand above all else. It is our shared weakness. "You and I have always shared a connection, because we have so much in common. We both care about our families above all else. I want him dead for the same reason you do. He hunted down your family, and he hunted down mine. Klaus brings misery and pain to all those who surround him, and everything he touches turns to ashes. Please, help me put an end to him." A tiny tear leaves me cheek before I sweep it away.

Elijah doesn't hesitate for a fraction of a second before agreeing. I let out a heavy sigh of relief. Something is finally going according to plan. Elijah interrupts my thoughts with his opinions about the plan. "It may take me a few days, but I should be able to acquire the necessary tools to kill my brother. You just stay put and wait to receive word." Elijah stands up to leave, when I grab his arm to stop him.

"Wait, I can help. Future knowledge remember. I know where the site of the witch massacre is." Elijah's interest is peaked, since this is the integral part of his plan. I scribble down an address and hand it to him. "I trust you are still friends with Dr. Martin and his son." Elijah nods and I continue with my plan. "Dr. Martin can take on all the power of the dead witches and when Klaus comes he can use it to kill him," I advise.

Elijah looks at me impressed at my knowledge of the intricacies of his plan. "I assume you know the price of using all that power at once," he questions warningly?

"Dr. Martin will die," I state grimly. A pang of guilt runs through me, but I try to remember that his death might save thousands of lives. It will save my family's life. I also remember when he tried to murder me and most of the guilt fades away. Dr. Martin knows the price of his actions, and if he is prepared to accept those consequences then so be it. My guilt is gone, and I continue with my advice for how best to kill Klaus. "Have a vampire reach out to Klaus. One who is preferably on vervain. We will lure Klaus here, and you will stay out of sight until he shows his face, and then Dr. Martin will kill him. Any questions," I ask cheerfully, feeling a sense of pride for having thought of every contingency.

"Just one," Elijah states softly. "In the midst of planning to kill Klaus, when did we find time to become close or share these stories that you seem to know about me?"

I was hoping we wouldn't have to talk about this. Every time I'm forced to relive this point in my life, I feel vulnerable and exposed, but I have lied to Elijah too many times. I owe him the truth. "It was after Klaus was dead. You visited me in the hospital," I tell him before he cuts me off.

"The hospital," he asks concerned? "Were you badly hurt?" I let out a humorless laugh before correcting his assumption.

"It wasn't exactly that kind of hospital. Back in the day, I guess they would have called them asylums." Understanding flashes across his face, and then shame at bringing it up. I tell the more comforting part of the story in hopes of making Elijah feel better.

"You visited me every week. Some days you read to me, but others you just told me stories about what it was like growing up a thousand years ago, and your life as a vampire. It seems silly, but those stories were the only thing left in my life that felt real, when everything else was stripped away. You never asked stupid questions like how I was doing or how I was feeling. You just let me be, and that meant more than you will ever know," I say while grabbing his hand in gratitude.

"Before I forget there is one more thing I should mention." Elijah braces for the worst thinking it is some new cataclysmic catastrophe that is about to occur, but all I want to offer him is a deal that I know he will take. "Assuming you help me kill Klaus, I will tell you where you can find your family." Shock registers across Elijah's face. For so long, he thought his family was lost to him forever, and now I was offering him hope. I could relate to that feeling better than anyone else. I quickly elaborate after seeing the eager look on Elijah's face for more details. "If you promise not to undagger them within Mystic Falls and to force their continued exile, I will reunite you with your siblings. You have my word," I swear as I look him squarely in the eyes.

"And you have mine," Elijah echoes right back. "Thank you for a lovely evening Elena, but I really must be going," he says while taking my hand and giving it the briefest kiss. I smile back at him as I watch him see himself out.

This is almost over I think blissfully to myself. In a few weeks, Klaus could be dead, and my family will be safe. I don't think that I could be filled with more joy until I get a text from Caroline. There are only a few words, (_You need to see this!), _along with a picture that tells a lot more. I check my phone three times to make sure I am not hallucinating. I even enhance the detail, just to be sure this is real. Damon and Elena are in the picture locked in a very intense lip lock in the middle of the carnival. I am rendered speechless and thoughts start flying through my head. I have had real dates with less action than this. Wasn't she still heartbroken over Stefan? After my frenzied confusion dies down, I am left with only one question. What in the Hell happened on that date?

**I know I'm evil, but please review and tell me how evil you think I am :)**


	20. Chapter 20

**I know this has taken forever to finally upload, but my writer's block has been really bad for this story. So sorry. I wanted this to be a longer update after such a long time away, but I decided to break the 'date' chapter up into at least two parts. This way I can upload this part tonight, and maybe get the second part up tomorrow. I hope you all enjoy, and please tell me what you guys think about how I portrayed the first part of Damon and Elena's date. **

Current Elena's POV

The booths are set up, the games are fully stocked, and the carnival looks perfect, even by Caroline's strict standards, so now I have nothing to distract me from the butterflies doing the cha-cha in my stomach. As I see the source of my nervousness walk towards me, I curse the universe for being too cruel. Damon is wearing a dark blue button down shirt and dark navy blue jeans. His outfit is by no means unusual attire for the fashion forward vampire, but the way his face lights up when he spots me in the crowd, makes him look too sexy for his own good.

No, not sexy, I did not mean sexy. I meant good. He looks good. Good is a perfectly acceptable adjective to think about your ex's brother. I breathe in and out calmly as if recovering from a panic attack. My attempts to slow my heartbeat fail miserably when Damon stops not even a foot in front of me. He notices. Of course, he notices. Damn his vampire senses. It makes it impossible to keep anything from him, and his smugness increases, as if that was possible.

"Someone's happy to see me," Damon states as cocky as ever. "And might I say Elena, you in that dress, puts every other girl at this school to shame, if you don't mind me saying so," Damon compliments as he takes my hand and kisses it. The gesture feels oddly reminiscent of our first meeting, and the butterflies that I tried so desperately to murder all afternoon are multiplying rapidly.

You would think for someone who aspired for years to be a writer, that I would be better at expressing myself through words. But the feeling of electricity where Damon's lips met my skin acted as a type of drug to my system, and I felt woozy from the contact. I just stared back at Damon's amused grin, while he waited for me to say something. In this moment, I don't need profound words, poetic words, or intelligent words. I just need **any** words, so I utter the first words that come to my mind, big mistake. "You too," I respond idiotically.

Damon seems more pleased with himself by the second, and I want to find a shovel so I can dig myself a hole to crawl into for the next decade, or however long it takes for Damon to forget my nonsensical response. His voice sounds smooth to my ears and the peace that it brings me makes me question if he is compelling me, but I clutch my necklace and dismiss the idea. "You think I put all the girls in this school to shame too? Well I am truly touched Elena. I got all pretty just for you," Damon teases playfully.

I roll my eyes and look away as I blush beet red from embarrassment. "Ha, ha, very funny, is the torture part of our evening over, because future Elena promised me a night of stress free fun? Are you up to the task Mr. Salvatore," I question challengingly?

The stubborn side of Damon makes an appearance, and I know that he can never walk away from such a challenge. Immediately I regret asking, because judging by the look on his face, I have no idea what I am in for. "You're really gonna wish you hadn't said that," Damon warns with a smile that holds a hint of mischief.

Before I have time to ask any more questions, Damon is dragging me along suddenly walking with great purpose. We stop in front of the stage that was set up for the karaoke singers, and his intentions dawn on me. No, he wouldn't, I try reassuring myself. Who am I kidding, of course he would. Damon is gonna make me sing karaoke. "No way," I vehemently make my stand. "I am not singing by myself in front of all of my classmates for your amusement," I claim resolutely.

Damon stares at me as if I have said something silly. "Well of course not Elena," he assures me, but the wave of relief is short lived once he finishes his thought. "You don't really think I would ask you to sing all by yourself. We are singing a duet. So what do you think? Should we go with a modern hit to please the masses or maybe kick it old school with a classic. You pick," Damon **graciously** offers.

Just I am about to give a brilliantly worded rebuttal, I notice a familiar face amongst the crowd. Stefan came, and he was with **her.** Damon registers my sudden change in demeanor and he follows my gaze until it settles on our exes laughing together as Katherine not so subtly brushes her hand on Stefan's arm. Stefan catches my eyes, and for a second he almost looks remorseful, but once he looks over to see his brother at my side, he just looks pissed off and spiteful. Perfect. Stefan breaks up with me then shows up at the carnival with his ex-girlfriend, and he acts like the victim.

I'm so engrossed with my hurt feelings at Stefan's betrayal that I almost don't notice the heart break written all over Damon's face. I feel so selfish for only thinking of my own pain. Whatever I am going through, this must be a thousand times worse for Damon. I don't have to deal with the terrible sense of déjà vu that accompanies seeing his brother laughing with Katherine as he watches from the sidelines.

Instead of walking away, Stefan moves Katherine to a booth closer to us and puts his hand on her lower back, while staring daggers at Damon. I feel an unexpected stab of hatred pass through my heart in that moment, not for the pain Stefan caused me, but for the pain he is currently inflicting on his brother. Because this isn't about love, it's about revenge. Stefan must have heard that I was going with Damon, and all his apparent remorse for mistreating Damon goes out the window. I'm now regretting yelling at future Elena for her outburst this morning, clearly she knows Stefan a lot better than I do, because I feel as if I am seeing him for the first time. This isn't the man that I fell in love with. This man is petty and cruel and vindictive.

I turn back around to Damon and whisper in his ear. "Let's show them what they lost," I challenge daringly. Damon nods in agreement as I pull him on stage. I've never sung a single note in front of an audience before, and I feel as if my heart will break free from my chest, it is beating so hard. Damon grabs hold of my shaking hand and squeezes it gently. I smile back at him in appreciation, and I gain a new feeling of strength at his touch. Stefan may be lost to me, but Damon is still right here at my side, holding my hand to make sure I'm okay. I never stop to ask what song we will be singing, but once the words appear on the screen, I realize how appropriate Damon's choice in song is as we both belt out _I Got You Babe_ to a cheering crowd. Neither of us glances back at Stefan or Katherine to see if they are watching. Neither of us even notices the other people in the crowd. For one instant in time, it is just me and Damon singing together like we are the only two people left in the world, and for the first time in a long while, I feel as if everything will be okay.

**As Always Please Read and Review**


	21. Chapter 21

**Here is the continuation of the 'date' chapter. I hope you guys like it, because I was a little unsure about how everyone will feel about certain parts. For starters, I don't know where this came from, but I felt the need to bash Stefan again in this chapter. You can blame it on last week's episode where Stefan was mostly an ass. This is new territory for me. In all of my other stories, Stefan is the exact opposite and in fact uncharacteristically understanding and nice, so if it feels like I am taking it too far let me know. I hope to get into a pattern where I can update this story at least once a week, so I don't have another long break without updating. Thanks always to those who read and reviewed the last chapter. Enjoy!**

Current Elena's POV

When the music stops, the crowd goes wild. Damon bows and waves to his adoring fans. I can't stop giggling at Damon's obvious attempts at showing off. Before I know it, I am bowing to the crowd as well. If you can't beat them, might as well join them. The applause dies down and we exit the stage only to run into a near murderous looking Stefan. His hand is now firmly grasping Katherine's. Apparently anything Damon does, Stefan thinks he can do better. Katherine doesn't appear pleased at Stefan's blatant attempts to make me jealous, but she seems to enjoy Stefan's company too much to walk away.

My first moment in front of Katherine is rather jarring. I expect her to look just like future Elena, a slight variation on myself. But I find that, while Katherine's physical appearance is similar to my own, her personality, confidence, and way of carrying herself is something foreign to my eyes. Katherine gives me a once over, sizing me up before she speaks. "Well that was quite a show," Katherine admits, only mildly sarcastic, trying to cut the tension of the moment.

Her attempts at breaking the ice fail, because my anger at Stefan boils over and I lash out fiercely. "What is she doing here, Stefan," I question furiously?

Stefan maintains an uncaring mask as he responds with a tone of indifference. "We're just enjoying the carnival. I heard about your big date and thought that you had the right idea. One day really is quite long enough to be in mourning over a loving committed relationship. Luckily for me, Katherine was kind enough to offer her company," Stefan answers with a gloating smile on his face.

I want to punch him, slap him. He's acting like a petulant teenager, and I briefly wonder what it truly means for a vampire to be eternally stuck in the body of a seventeen year old. My first instinct is to correct Stefan's assumption that Damon and I are on a date, but I know that this will please Stefan to no end, so I decide against it. Instead I merely address the giant problem that Stefan has created by bringing her here. "You do realize that you brought my doppelganger to a school function in which most of the town is in attendance? The leaders of Mystic Falls might not be the brightest, but I think they might notice and ask questions when they start seeing double," I point out

Katherine fields this question effortlessly. "Don't worry on that account. I compelled a few of your classmates to start a rumor that we were twins separated at birth and that we recently reunited via Facebook," Katherine explains casually.

Stefan interjects abruptly before I have time to offer a reply. "Well as fun as this has been, my **date** and I have better places to be. So now that we've got the pesky human problems out of the way, I think we'll be going," Stefan states while putting his arm around Katherine.

They both turn to leave before I call out his name. "Stefan, wait," I command. He turns only halfway back around, his body midway between staying and going. I look for some sign of the man that I love, but all I see in his eyes is emptiness, no good, no kindness, and no love. This realization only reignites my anger. "Is this how it's going to be from now on, I hurt your feelings and this is how you lash out at me," I inquire attempting to fight back tears of betrayal?

For a second I see a flicker of remorse, similar to the one that I saw at the house after future Elena yelled at him about Damon, but it vanishes as quickly as it appears. Stefan's face holds none of its former goodness or compassion as he attempts to hurt me even further. "I don't really care enough about your little **human** feelings to try to upset you. You're just not worth it. But Katherine was right, your performance was great. I almost believed that you genuinely like him," Stefan remarks cruelly.

Damon winces at the insult, probably because it hits at the heart of all of his insecurities. I feel the need to get the last word in, if not for myself, then at least for Damon's sake. "How dare you talk to him that way," I scream expressively. "Did you truly learn nothing from this morning? Damon may not be perfect, but at least he's not a child. Right now I feel a whole lot better with him by my side then you. So trust me when I say that my performance is nothing compared to yours. I at least have real feelings for my date," I admit in a rage.

The words tumble out without my consent, and when I look up, I see three pairs of stunned eyes staring back at me. Katherine looks in a fury and about to confront me, when Damon steps between us. His voice holds a dangerous warning in its tone, and if it was directed at me, I would be terrified. "If you take one more step near her, you better be prepared to kill me, because you are not harming one hair on her head while I'm still breathing," Damon threatens seriously. Katherine takes a beat to consider her options and opts to walk away, dragging Stefan along with her. Damon releases a sigh of relief once they're gone. "Are you okay," Damon asks concerned. His blue eyes convey such emotion that it takes my breath away. I nod my head signaling my answer.

"I know that tonight is supposed to be a time out from our regularly scheduled drama, and I know you need that as much as I do right now, but can I have five minutes just to be a messed up teenager and bitch about my ass of an ex-boyfriend," I question hopefully?

Damon keeps surprising me tonight, because he doesn't make a sarcastic remark. He doesn't question me further. He simply answers, "of course," and leads me to a secluded bench away from the crowds.

Once everyone else is out of earshot, I feel like I can breathe again, and I feel free to ask a question that I'm not sure I want the answer to. "From almost the moment we met, you've tried to convince me that Stefan isn't who he pretends to be. You told me several times that I didn't have the rest of the story. Is this what you meant? Is this the real Stefan," I ask terrified of his answer?

Damon breathes out a heavy sigh and I see how carefully he chooses his words as if he is afraid of saying the wrong thing. "It's not quite that simple, Elena. I'm not sure it's my place to say which side of Stefan is his true self. Anything I say against my brother will just sound petty and childish. The best I can tell you is that guy, that ass that you just saw, that isn't the brother that I grew up with. When we were kids, Stefan could be selfish at times, he could be juvenile, but he never relished inflicting suffering like he did tonight. My opinion, for whatever its worth, is that Stefan feels more than he's letting on. He's in pain and he doesn't want to deal, so he's shutting it out. Right now, Stefan wants to be hated, because it's just easier that way," Damon explains undoubtedly.

"You really think that Damon," I question expectantly?

He smiles sadly and speaks gently while rubbing my arm in a comforting gesture. "I have a little bit of experience in this area," Damon whispers regretfully. My heart constricts thinking of all the times that I saw Damon shutting people out, myself included. It wasn't because he didn't feel. I was because he felt too much.

My instincts take over and I wrap my arms tightly around Damon, never wanting to let go. He relaxes immediately into the hug and I feel a peace envelope me again. "I'm so sorry," I tell him unhappily.

Damon pulls out of the hug and stares back at me confused at my sentiment. "You my dear have nothing to be sorry for," he tells me softly.

"I know that this isn't my fault, but I'm just sorry that this happened to you. It's not just my heart that Stefan was trying to break. It was yours, and for that I'm so sorry," I repeat again.

"Strangely enough, that almost makes the rest of it okay. You don't have to worry about me. I've been around for a long time. I'm not going to be beaten just because some selfish bitch never loved me," Damon assures me flashing his signature smirk just to prove that he was alright.

He must know that he's not fooling me. This is an act that he is used to putting up to keep people from getting close to him, and I'm not gonna let him get away with it. "I do worry though," I admit honestly. "Doesn't it make it harder for you to see Stefan with her so soon?"

I'm slowly breaking through his defenses, and I swear Damon looks the teensiest bit impressed that I'm not giving up. This time when he speaks to me, there is no sarcasm, no evasions. No one needs to tell me that this is the true Damon Salvatore, because this feels more real and more genuine than any other moment that we have shared together. "Honestly, if anything, they're just making it easier," Damon admits to my surprise. "Tonight I realized that the woman that I fell in love with wasn't real. She came into my life when I desperately needed someone to love me. My father hated me. The rest of the town thought me a coward after I was branded a deserter. Except for Stefan, there wasn't a person on Earth who truly cared for me. Katherine showed up and told me she loved me. She said she wanted to be with me forever, and she promised that we would both finally be free from society's expectations and disapproval. I spent 145 years yearning to feel that accepted again, and in nearly a century and a half I never did, not until I met you," Damon confesses.

My heart feels ready to burst at his words. It may have been foolish. It may have been irrational, but for one second, I was free of my own hang-ups and doubts. I act on impulse and I collide roughly with Damon's lips. For a moment, Damon remains motionless. He takes time to process that yes this really is happening. After a couple seconds, he is kissing me back. His right hand is getting tangled up in my hair. I can feel his left hand roaming my back desperate for any touch of skin. Damon's tongue invades my mouth and I suddenly feel hot and breathless and alive. The tiny click of Caroline's camera phone startles us both from our intimate embrace. She smiles somewhat evilly back at Damon and me. I groan thinking of what Caroline intends to do with that picture, but she scampers off before I have time to question her further.

Damon and I sit in silence as I catch my breath. Never in my life have I felt anything that intense. With Matt our kisses were sweet and innocent, like first kisses should be. With Stefan it felt stronger, it meant more, and I felt safe and loved. But with Damon, it felt like being on fire. Every nerve ending in my body was electric and I was consumed by desperate longing. I'm left to wonder what that means as I struggle for what to say next. Luckily, Damon is brave enough to break the silence with a joke that I'm sure is as much about protecting himself as it is about breaking the tension.

"So I don't have much experience with non-dates, but do they typically end in making out? Because if so, we should go on more of them," Damon proposes with a cocky smile.

He relaxes almost imperceptibly when I smile back at him. "I think we can officially upgrade this to an actual date," I state joyfully.

Damon can't hold back his emotions anymore. He bites down on his lip as if he futilely is trying to hold back a smile. His entire face glows with happiness, and I promise myself that I will do anything in my power to make him smile like that again. He sounds almost childlike as he speaks about what this truly means. "I love upgrades," Damon exclaims gleefully. He makes small circles on the uncovered part of my thigh, and his glorious hand makes it difficult to concentrate on his words. "Are there any new perks to this upgrade," Damon asks confidently?

"I might let you kiss me again for one," I respond coyly and place another quick kiss on his lips that makes us both yearn for more. I lean close to his ear and whisper, "If you're really lucky, I might even agree to go on a second **actual** date."

Damon takes this as another challenge, but this time I'm excited for whatever he has planned. A date with Damon Salvatore could never be boring. "So what must I do to convince you that I am worthy of a second date," Damon questions curiously?

"You're already worthy," I assure him as I raise my hand to caress his cheek. I know that I have said something important, because Damon's face changes to absolute adoration in an instant. "But before we get ahead of ourselves, what are we doing for the rest of our official first date? I put myself entirely in your hands Mr. Salvatore," I tell him earnestly.

"I was thinking that you need something to remember this night by, a keepsake if you will. I suggest that we head over to one of those booths that you so tirelessly put up this afternoon so I can win you a bear," Damon proposes.

I can't believe my ears. Damon Salvatore wants to participate in town sponsored activities, where people might suspect that he is becoming invested in Mystic Falls, all so he can win me a prize. "You want to win me a bear? Why, I certainly don't need anything to remember this night by," I ask in disbelief?

"That teddy bear on your bed looks lonely. He needs a lady friend. It would be too cruel to keep two stuffed bears from finding love. Don't you agree," Damon asks jokingly?

His logic is crazy, but I'm too caught up in his smile to care. "It would be inhumane," I agree ecstatically as we both walk over arms interlocked and grinning like idiots. This night is nothing like I planned. It is so much more.

**As Always Please Read and Review**


	22. Chapter 22

**I am trying to finish this story as soon as possible. I will try to update either every day or every other day. It is the only way that I will feel free to start something new. I hope you enjoy. **

Future Elena's POV

Almost two hours after the text from Caroline, and I am still waiting impatiently in my kitchen for Elena to come home. Half of the time I spend pacing back and forth wondering what Damon and the other me could be doing right now, and the other half, I am furiously texting Caroline for anymore scoop about this mystery date. The only details she gives me leave me even more confused. I never got to go on a date with Damon, so I don't know what is normal, but I definitely didn't expect karaoke, carnival games, and hand holding. The thought that they are having so much fun should fill me with joy, but I feel a tight sensation in the pit of my stomach like my insides are knotting together.

The sound of the door opening propels me from my seat where I confront a beaming Elena holding a teddy bear with a pink bow in its hair. Her first words are nothing but complimentary, but I fix her with a withering stare that she seems too distracted to notice. "It is official. You are a genius. I'm sorry I ever doubted you," Elena jubilantly apologizes.

The mood instantly becomes tense, when she hears the angry tone in my voice. "Do you have any idea what time it is? I have been so worried," I bark loudly at Elena like a concerned parent.

Elena's eyebrows scrunch together forming a quizzical glare. She calmly looks at her watch and resumes staring as if I am an escapee from a mental institution, which technically I am, but hardly relevant.

"It's 10:15, and since we're not Amish, that makes me very early, because my curfew isn't till midnight. Want to tell me what this is about," Elena inquires suspiciously?

I stutter nervously attempting to form a coherent response. "Well, that, that, is beside the point, obviously," I reply weakly.

Elena simply looks amused now and asks, "Remind me again. What was the point?" Her smirk grows wider until she hears my answer and then it disappears altogether.

My true reason comes bursting out, and I am fighting tears with every word. "You kissed him. It wasn't even supposed to be a real date, and you kissed him and there was hand holding. I never got public kissing or dates or hand holding," I admit disappointedly. Elena's face falls at my confession. Her expression no longer holds any trace of humor. All I see is sympathy and understanding.

She leads me over to the couch and sits me down. "Want to hold the bear," Elena offers like we're still in Kindergarten?

My response holds more bitterness and frustration than I would like. In the back of my mind, I know it's not her fault, but she's the only one in the room to blame. "I'm a grown woman. I don't need to hold a bear like I'm a child," I reply slightly snappish.

She doesn't sink to my level and snap back, even though she has every right to. "Sometimes we all need something to hold onto, so you hold onto this bear, and I'll hold onto you," Elena compromises. Her arm circles around my shoulders, and she pulls me down until I am leaning on her shoulder. I smile dimly and gently remove the bear from her grasp, and I clutch it close to my chest. "It's okay sometimes to be jealous. Truth be told, when I saw you up in our room last night with Damon, I was pretty jealous myself," Elena confesses to my disbelief.

Her admitting that she feels the same way as I do about our twisted little arrangement brings a sense of relief. No matter what, it's as if I'm not alone. There is at least one other person who understands, myself. "If we're being open, I also might have been the tiniest bit jealous that you got to sleep in the same bed as Damon. That simple act of holding each other and sleeping together is another one of the many experiences that Damon and I never had in our future," I admit regretfully.

She smiles sadly at my honesty and hugs me a little tighter.

Elena fixes me with her best sympathetic caring face, and I realize why people find it difficult to say no to me. Who could say no to that face? The voice filled with thoughtfulness doesn't hurt either. "I understand why it feels wrong seeing me with him, but this is what you wanted, remember that. You went through Hell and back again, so I could have the future that you never got to have."

When Elena explains it to me in a rational manner, I of course feel silly for ever being jealous, since everything she says is correct. "See when you say it like that, it sounds kind of stupid," I half-joke.

"Is there a non-stupid version," Elena questions fairly with only a tiny hint of mockery?

I can't help but laugh at her question, and she smiles at the lightening of my mood. "Probably not," I concede with a smile on my face.

"It may be stupid and irrational, but after what you've been through, you deserve to be a little stupid and irrational," Elena reasons.

"So you don't think I'm insane," I ask optimistically?

Her answer only seeks to lift my spirits. "Oh, no, you're bat shit crazy. I'm just saying that I understand and you're not alone," Elena replies sarcastically. We both erupt in a fit of giggles, and for a second I feel like a normal high school girl in the arms of a trusted friend. She even tries to bring me some much needed perspective, but she doesn't know enough of the truth to realize how depressing her suggestion truly is.

"Look at it this way, once you fix things in my time, you can return to your new future and have all of those moments that you missed out on," Elena adds hopefully. My heart breaks a little, more than I thought was possible after all this time. She can't be blamed for her ignorance. The last thing that I want is anyone knowing the truth about my own future. They would only worry needlessly, and it's not as if they could stop it. I know the deal I made, but today I'm finding it difficult to live with.

So instead of dwelling on the things I can't change, I plaster a brave smile on my face and excuse myself for the night. Elena raises a few eyebrows at my sudden desire to leave, but she doesn't question me further. She simply hugs me one last time and bids me good night and sweet dreams. I need to leave. I need to see him. There is no place I'd rather be with what little time I have left. Klaus will be here soon enough if Elijah has any say in the matter, and this will all be over, at least for me.

**As Always Please Read and Review**


	23. Chapter 23

**I never thought I'd finish this chapter. It took forever. The really emotional ones always do. If you guys thought the last one was sad, you will probably be crying at this one. I hope you all don't hate me, but I felt I had to do it. Thank you to all the wonderful people who have reviewed, especially those who do it for every chapter. It is the only thing that gets me out of a writer's funk. I hope you enjoy. **

Future Elena POV

Upon entering the boardinghouse, I race up the stairs to Damon's room. When I pass through his open door, I see him lying down with a book in one hand and a teddy bear with a blue bow in the other. He looks too cute clutching the bear tightly that I almost regret interrupting this moment. Once Damon spots me, he places the bear at his side, no longer holding it, but not too far away either. If I didn't know better, I'd think he was embarrassed. "Did you win a matching bear for yourself," I ask flashing my most playful smile?

Damon no longer appears embarrassed, only blissful and carefree. "Actually my date won me this bear," Damon replies putting special emphasis on the word date as if this is the first time he's ever said it.

His innocent joy puts a smile on my face. How could I not love seeing him so happy and at peace? He deserves it. They both do. I steer the conversation to a new topic, once I feel the familiar stirrings of jealousy, when I think of all the moments that I will never have with him, all the moments I could have had. I present my best fake smile and give him the low down on my night's activities. "Well I'm pleased to say that both of our nights were a rousing success. With any luck, this nightmare with Klaus will be over soon, and my work will be done," I predict feigning happiness.

Damon senses my less than upbeat mood and he questions me worryingly. "What happens then," Damon asks concerned?

I sidestep the issue by ignoring his true question. "You and Elena will live happily ever after," I reply, displaying a near genuine smile.

He rolls his eyes at my evasion and asks the more pointed question. "That's not what I meant, though I do appreciate your Disney like outlook. I meant what will happen to you," Damon questions slightly worried?

I'm treading on very dangerous ground as we speak. Damon will never accept what is going to happen to me. He might be able to see through a lie, but I hope a half truth will sound believable enough. "I'll leave. Once my job is done, there is no place for me here," I state sadly.

Damon's expression falls noticeably. He's disappointed and his voice betrays as much. "So you'll go back to your future, at least your altered future," Damon assumes miserably?

"Something like that," I evade masterfully with a false smile to convince Damon that nothing's wrong.

Damon appears in the midst of a deep inner struggle. He almost looks guilty, when he asks his next question. "I know it's a selfish request, but would you stay if I asked you to?"

He's really trying to just kill me. Of course I would stay if I had a choice, but that decision isn't mine. My heart breaks even further as I have to explain. My brave face falters as I speak and a few times, I have to look away just to shield myself from Damon's despairing eyes.

"Damon, please don't make this harder than it has to be," I beg. "You're supposed to be with Elena from your own time. It was selfish of me to kiss you the way that I have been, because this isn't my time. Every second that we spend together, I feel like a thief stealing from Elena the life that she should have. I can't do that anymore," I explain with a guilty conscience.

Once again I'm tormented by Damon's look of disappointment. I cannot understand why it matters so much if I stay. He still has current Elena. He doesn't need us both. After his initial distress passes, Damon tries to find a silver lining in my logic. "But we'll still see each other again, won't we? You have to return to some point in your timeline, which means that at some point you will show up again, right," Damon questions searching for some trace of hope that I can't give him?

I make one last plea for him to drop this, all the while knowing that my prayers will go unanswered. "Damon, you've had a great night, let's not ruin it with things that don't matter." My last comment only seems to have upset Damon further. He looks incredulous and angry.

"Don't do that. Don't say that what happens to you doesn't matter, because it does. It matters to me, so tell me the truth before I go out of my mind," Damon demands forcefully. He's now risen from his spot on the bed and he starts pacing back and forth. This really is driving him crazy. To my absolute dread, I realize I have to tell him the truth. I can't hide it from him anymore than I could hide it from Stefan.

I take a seat towards the front of his bed sensing that this is a conversation I should be seated for. "When the witches sent me back, they warned me that there were consequences to time travel," I inform Damon ominously. He stops in front of me, and I grab for his hand, hoping for the strength to continue. "Every significant moment of our lives informs all that we will become. By altering the events of the next year, I am changing who Elena will grow up to be. Surely you've noticed how different we are? I can't go back to my future, because I won't belong there any longer. It's not my life anymore it's hers."

My hope is that I won't have to explain any further. Dwelling on my future is a bleak prospect that I avoid at every opportunity, but Damon still doesn't understand. He proposes a crazy solution that I wish with all my heart I could say yes to. "Then stay," Damon begs. "Don't go. I know it will be confusing and bizarre, but I'm a vampire and you're a time traveler, at some point we need to grade on a curve when it comes to our perceptions of normal. Stay here with me. Even if we can't kiss anymore or flirt, stay here just to talk with me or joke with me," Damon pleads his case with fervor.

Tears fill my eyes and our gazes lock while I fight to tell him what I feel in my heart. "You must know that I would stay with you forever if I could. I wish, God you have no idea how much I wish, that things could be different, but I can't stay," I admit, my heart breaking at Damon's anguish.

"Why not," Damon asks, looking more like a little boy than a nearly 170 year old vampire?

"Because I don't belong in this time either," I declare to my own great disappointment. Now Damon just looks determined. He thinks that this is a problem he can fix, be the hero and save the day, but some problems can't be fixed.

Damon sits down in front of me and takes both of my hands and wraps them in his own. For a moment, I wonder if the man before is the one that Damon spoke of from 1864, before he was broken, when he thought he was loved. It kills me to think that my leaving might break him further.

"Neither do I," Damon's voice breaks through the silence. "I never belonged anywhere, but I think I belong with you. So wherever you're going, that's where I belong too," Damon clarifies.

"Where I'm going Damon, you can't follow me," I tell him hoping he finally puts the pieces together.

"Where is that," Damon asks petrified? It is only now that I realize he knows. Maybe deep down, he always did. He sensed that he couldn't keep me, but he just didn't know why. This is Damon's greatest nightmare realized. His face stares back at me expectantly. Damon knows what I'm about to say, but he needs to hear the words to make it real.

"I honestly don't know," I confess thoughtfully. "The witches said that at some point, I would change too much, and my very existence would become a paradox. They said I would cease to exist once the events that made me who I am were undone. I don't know if there's a heaven for time travelers, or if I'll simply be erased, but regardless of where I go, you can't follow," I finish gloomily.

It's amazing how even a supernatural creature can act so human at times, even going so far as to progress through the five stages of grief. Knowing Damon, he will be stuck in denial and anger for a while. All I hear in Damon's voice is disbelief and despair. "No, I don't accept that. You're eighteen years old. You're entitled to a life," Damon yells, either to me or to the universe.

I struggle to find the words that will make him understand. Whatever has happened, I don't regret a moment of it. "Don't you see Damon," I ask pleadingly for him to open his eyes? "I had a life, but my mistakes cost me everything that mattered in it. If I had been willing to make some hard choices, things would have turned out differently. I could never accept the idea of a necessary evil until it was too late. If I had listened to you and let Bonnie sacrifice herself to kill Klaus, none of the rest of it would have happened. The life that I had I ruined," I confess a truth that I never admitted to anyone before, not even myself.

Damon goes into full protective mode once the words come out. "No, Stefan ruined it. Klaus ruined it. You were a victim," Damon tries to convince me.

All these words, all these feelings, and Damon still doesn't see the point. "Even if that were true, it doesn't change the fact that I am at the end of my existence," I remind Damon sadly. "I know the deal I made, and I would do it again without blinking. You need to accept that our time together is limited. In a few weeks, I won't be here anymore," I state strongly, so Damon knows how serious this truly is.

Acceptance is a step clearly a ways off, because Damon still appears trapped in denial, and his every word feels as if my heart is being squeezed within my chest. "I can't accept it Elena. It's not fair. You made some mistakes. I've made thousands. Why is your life any less worthy than mine? How can you fade away, while I'm still here? You deserve a second chance," Damon reasons desperately. I know that if there was anyone around to offer a deal, Damon would have moved right on to bargaining.

"This is my second chance Damon, can't you see that," I ask Damon hopelessly? "Those two months after I lost you. Do you know what I prayed for every night? It wasn't more time. I prayed for one more day with you and with all the other people that I love. Do you realize what a gift this has been for me? I was reunited with the people who I thought I had lost forever, and I was given a chance to apologize for all the ways that I failed them or wronged them, and I got to look them in the eyes and tell them how much I love them. No one could ever ask for a greater gift, and I would trade however many empty decades I'm owed in this mortal existence just for one more day here with you," I promise.

Throughout our entire argument, I feel that Damon is forgetting one key point that might cheer him up. "Besides you're not really losing me, tonight proved that. My current self will still be here. You have a chance to have something real with someone who loves you, isn't that enough?"

I have been the one doing all the explaining, but now it's time for me to understand. Damon's reasoning for fighting me isn't just about what's fair or what's right. He's afraid of what he'll lose if I go. "That's just it. She doesn't love me. **You** love me. **She** likes me, she wants me, but she doesn't love me," Damon elaborates.

"**Yet**, she doesn't love you yet," I remind Damon vehemently. "I am living proof that there is hope," I tell him encouragingly.

Bitterness fills his voice in a way that I haven't heard since our fight on the porch the night Caroline was turned. "Hope hasn't always panned out for me in the past, so forgive me if I don't' trust it. How can you know, beyond a shadow of a doubt know, that she will pick me in the end," Damon questions fearfully?

This part is easy to answer. The words flow from my lips freely and I can't feel sad about my circumstances anymore, because I got exactly what I wished for.

"From the moment I came here, my biggest goal, after saving everyone's lives, was to stop her from making my mistakes," I begin. "In that task I succeeded beyond my wildest hopes. Your Elena is so far ahead of where I was in this time. She accepts that she has feelings for you. I didn't accept that until days before your death. You should trust her feelings **more** than you trust mine, because she is better than me. It's only fitting that she deserves a better life." Damon looks like he is about to rebut my claim, but I put two fingers to his lips silencing him and then presenting him with a choice.

"So the way that I see it we have two options, option A) we keep fighting about this right up until the moment I'm gone, thereby ruining our last days together, or option B) we accept that time is too precious to waste worrying about circumstances we can't control or change." I lean forward until our two foreheads and touching and I whisper a soft plea. "I'm begging you my love to choose option B)."

Damon knows he can't fight me, not on this. How could he argue with me loving him too much to want to fight with him in my last days? It takes all his strength to do it, but he partially concedes with a heavy heart. "Because I love you, I won't fight with you anymore, but I can't give up either. I don't know how, so I'm going to look for another way, a spell, something to give you the life that you deserve." It occurs to me that this is the first time that he has told me he loves me in this time, and my heart fills again at the familiar words. I place the tiniest kiss on his lips before pulling away.

"I think I can accept that compromise on one condition," I offer.

"What's that," Damon asks, clearly willing to give me the moon if I requested it.

"Let me stay with you, just sleeping in this bed together. I may not be willing to keep kissing you for Elena's sake, but I don't want to waste another night without you," I finish explaining, hoping for a yes.

Damon's arm reaches to lift me up. He lays me back down on his bed and crawls in next to me. I snuggle up to his chest, and just as I'm drifting off to sleep, I hear Damon whisper, "I will be here as long as you'll have me."

**As Always Please Read and Review**


	24. Chapter 24

**So I totally said I would take a day off of updating, then I write the longest chapter thus far, go figure. This chapter is going to be very different, because it is told from Katherine's perspective for the first time. I thought after the carnival, I needed to tell her side of things. I hope you all like it, and sorry there is no Delena in this chapter. Next chapter is going to be heavy with Delena goodness. I hope you all enjoy.**

Katherine's POV

As the morning light wakes me from my sleep, I take in my unfamiliar surroundings, specifically, the naked vampire sleeping below me. A devilish smirk graces my face when I think about the events of last night. Nothing like hot hate sex to put a girl in a good mood.

Ordinarily, I don't take too well to giving up control or being used to vent hurt teenage feelings over lesser versions of myself, but I figured I owed Stefan a few favors after my near century and a half absence. If this is what he needs to get over the hump, I can't think of more fun way to help him move on. Stefan stirs a little in his slumber still caught in the place between waking and sleeping. A delightfully evil plan forms in my mind of the best way to wake him up. I straddle him effortlessly and pin his arms above his head while peppering light kisses from his ear all the way down his stomach. My hips grind deliciously against his lower half until his eyes fly open and his breath comes in short pants, clearly enjoying the attention.

Stefan quickly changes positions so he is on top and he pins both my arms at my side. His husky voice fills the air, "Little pathetic don't you think, trying to sleep rape me."

Frustration leaks from my voice as I release him. "I liked you so much better when you were asleep," I tell Stefan as he roughly pushes me off him.

Stefan's guard is up and he's trying desperately to shut out his humanity, but with a weakened diet, he can't manage shutting all the feelings out. The only thing he can manage is faking a rather unconvincing persona of indifference. It makes for a real ass of a bedmate. "As fun as last night's little romp was, no reason for a repeat performance," Stefan claims while searching for his discarded shirt. I roll my eyes at Stefan's blatantly obvious attempts to push anyone and everyone out of his life so he can give in to the ripper.

"And Stefan the jackass makes his first daily appearance," I respond sarcastically. Not that I'm one to judge, what with my limited interactions with the softer human emotions, but this isn't the Stefan I came back for. His next biting remark I realize is only an attempt to hurt me. I just wish it wasn't so effective.

"Spoken by the most selfish person I know," Stefan insults me with dead unforgiving eyes. To my credit, I don't so much as flinch at his abuse. I merely keep smiling as if nothing fazes me and deliver a witty retort to hide my pain.

"The difference is I'm known for being a bitch. This is what your friends might call concerning behavior for you, that is if you hadn't already alienated every other person in your life," I remind him. The distant look in his eyes tells me he is reliving last night's theatrics, either his confrontation with Elena and Damon or his confrontation with Caroline at the end of the night. Both were pretty ugly, but Stefan's fight with the blonde Barbie stung him more, because she initially was trying to help. Caroline confronted him about 25 minutes after our run in with our respective exes and he lashed out at her, told her a relationship between a human and a vampire was doomed and that she was an idiot for trying to hold on to the high school quarterback. Caroline slapped him hard across the face and told him he was better off alone.

Stefan chooses this morning to express his regret and guilt by making the people around him feel his pain, starting with me. "The last thing I need is help from the likes of you," Stefan claims bitterly. So much anger and self-loathing, it's a good thing he's immortal, or his brooding would have produced some serious wrinkles by now.

I'm getting fed up with the attitude, so I use my vampire speed to pin him to a wall, and this time not in a sexy way. "That's great Stefan. You've already pushed away Elena, Damon, and Caroline, why don't you start in on me? See if you can't drive me away too," I challenge before he shoves me hard across the room.

His next attempts at wounding me are much more effective at inflicting pain than Stefan's pitiful little shove. "Shouldn't be that hard, last time I did it without even trying. Imagine how quickly you'll race out of town when I put my mind to it," Stefan bites back cruelly.

It always comes back to that. Stefan's not mad that I compelled him. After my rejection of his older brother, he's not even mad that I was with them both at the same time. He's still angry that I left without him. Ironic since that's the one decision I don't regret.

"I didn't have a lot of options back then Stefan," I reply defensively. "In 1864, I didn't have any hope of killing Klaus, and he spent centuries hunting me down like a dog. Sooner or later you would have gotten caught up in that too, and it would have gotten you killed," I explain. Stefan's mask wavers for a second. The warmth in his eyes reemerges for a moment at my confession, but Stefan wraps himself up in sarcastic remarks, so no one can hurt him anymore.

"Your concern for my wellbeing is touching, but save it for someone who believes you," Stefan responds mockingly.

I throw my hands up in the air, release an aggravated sigh, and curse fate for making me fall for an eternally angsty teenager. "Fine, you don't want to believe me or trust me, that's your choice, but I'm not bailing this time. One day you're gonna wake up and realize that I'm the only one who's still here, the only person who isn't going to give up just because you're mean to me," I reassure him.

This catches his attention, because despite his best efforts, I still haven't left. However, Stefan still doesn't trust my motives or my dedication to him, so he tests the waters with a question he pretends not to care about. "Why's that, don't you have something better to do with your eternal existence," Stefan asks looks expectantly at me for an answer he can understand.

Probably not the ideal moment to respond with sarcasm, but his distrust was starting to piss me off. "I have a lot of things I could be doing instead of talking to a moping vampire who can't find a middle ground between holier than thou saint or reckless mass murderer," I accuse unsympathetically This allegation wounds Stefan more than he would care to admit, so he looks away hoping I don't notice the shame present on his face. I release a breath and regret my sudden outburst. It might have been true, but it didn't help my cause much. Most of the sarcasm has left my voice before I speak to him again. I still don't allow my voice to betray my true vulnerability, but I do point out the truth.

"Look around Stefan. I'm still here, because in case you haven't noticed, I can be a much bigger bitch than you, but you still found a way to love me. I left you. I hurt you. Maybe you want to hate me. Maybe you want me to suffer, but I'm not gonna give you the satisfaction of being right. I'm not gonna leave again. I am going to stay here, even when you're a jerk, even when you push me away. Your precious little girlfriend didn't wait more than a day to give up on you, but I will wait for you forever. Who else can say that? Who else ever has," I ask rhetorically?

Stefan takes a minute to gather his thoughts. My words are affecting him, but he still won't just admit it. He always did make everything entirely too difficult. With a tired tone in his voice, Stefan asks, "What do you want from me Katherine?"

This is my breaking point. I'm more than just honest. I'm more than just vulnerable. For the first time in 145 years, I'm real.

"I want the man who told me that he saw an angel when he looked at me and that the touch of my skin made his entire body ignite. You saw something in me, and it wasn't because I compelled you not to fear me. Whatever you saw, it was real. Maybe I just want something real again," I admit. In that instant, I swear I almost have Stefan back, because he is gazing at me in a way that he hasn't since he was human, if only the moment hadn't been interrupted.

"Downright touching," Damon sarcastically mocks from the doorway. I shoot Damon a death glare, which he ignores and continues with the mockery. "And her heart grew three sizes that day," Damon recites the familiar words to _How the Grinch Stole Christmas_.

Trying to reclaim some of my former dignity, I respond back with an equal level of sarcasm. "Have you never heard the term private moment?"

Damon only smiles at my aggravation, clearly enjoying it far too much. "Have you ever heard the expression couldn't give a rat's ass," Damon jokes resentfully?

"Why are you here," Stefan interrupts, clearly fed up with Damon and I's back and forth?

"I need to talk to you about Elena," Damon states, because apparently he has a death wish. One phrase and Damon undoes all the progress I made this morning. Stefan looks more pissed off and distant than ever. Stefan comes up with the most hurtful response he can think of before responding.

"Trouble in paradise already," Stefan asks bitterly? "She hasn't even been yours for 24 hours. Surely she couldn't have discarded you already," Stefan feigns shock at the idea? Damon appears about ready to blow, but he restrains himself from physically lashing out. His anger does lead his voice level to rise to almost yelling.

"For one second will you cut out the jealous vampire crap? Future Elena is going to die soon if we do nothing."

Stefan stands shocked and confused. Damon doesn't offer any more details, but I know what we're both thinking. Damon said future Elena would die, that must mean it is related to her time travel. She was never meant to survive this. "What about current Elena," Stefan asks after a long stretch of silence?

Damon answers his question without incident, but I should have known that could never last. "As far as I can tell she'll be fine and live a long and fruitful life," Damon responds lost in his own thoughts. Stefan takes a moment to consider this, and then responds with a question so idiotic, I almost want to punch him for his stupidity.

"Then why does it matter," Stefan asks, sounding almost confused at the supposed problem? Damon is enraged at his brother's words. He grabs him by the shirt and slams him against the wall. I briefly consider intervening, but I realize this is family business, and if I stick my pretty nose in, it will likely get flattened.

"Are you even hearing yourself right now," Damon barks his question, near madness by the looks of it? "Elena traveled through time to fix **your** mistake, a mistake I might add that cost her everything, and she's going to die because of that. Can you honestly tell me that you would feel nothing for her dying," Damon questions, desperately hoping for some spark of humanity left. His brother's answer physically deflates him and destroys all optimism.

"Yes I can," Stefan lies persuasively. His face set hard as stone.

Damon of course doesn't give up after a minor setback. "Well if heartfelt pleas won't work, let's see how you respond to acts of violence," Damon threatens with his right hand now firmly locked around Stefan's throat. "Listen close brother," Damon orders. "Elena is the one good thing that's ever happened to me, the only good thing. If she dies, and you don't do everything possible to stop it, I will make you suffer the likes of which you've never even seen before," Damon warns menacingly.

Stefan doesn't appear fazed by the threats. If anything, Stefan grows cockier after Damon's threats. "You won't kill me," Stefan claims confidently.

"Probably not," Damon concedes, "but I will dedicate myself to the eradication of every happiness you've ever known. It took me 145 years to overcome one grudge. How many centuries do you think I will spend plotting your destruction if she dies," Damon reasons with an eerie sense of calm in his voice?

I finally pick my moment to intercede before their fighting grows any worse. "We'll help Damon," I offer quickly. Damon stares in disbelief at my agreement. I throw in an insult just so he won't think I'm going soft. "As much as I might loathe that tiresome little twit, I guess I owe you a few favors for ruining your life. I can talk to some witches and see what they can do," I propose diplomatically. Damon nods his head as a form of gratitude. Right before he makes his exit, he stops and remarks, "If it was anyone else, I might say thank you."

Knowing that the sentiment was not an easy one to express, I meet him halfway. "If I **were** anyone else, I might say you're welcome." Damon nods again in recognition and leaves me alone with his brother.

Apparently still reeling from the face off with Damon, Stefan responds angrily to my rather gracious offer of assistance. "Why did you agree to help him," Stefan asks accusingly?

This right here is the problem with turning vampires too young. They're immature and can't see past their own emotions to see the bigger picture. Instead of responding back with another sarcastic comment that will get us nowhere, I decide to give honesty another chance.

"Because he's your brother, and one day when you allow yourself to feel again, he'll remember that you helped save her, and that will mean something," I sincerely answer. Stefan stares at me skeptically, and for the millionth time since I've come back, he questions my motives.

"Why do you care if Damon ever talks to me again," Stefan inquires cynically?

Stefan isn't wrong to doubt me. I ruined his relationship with Damon by not choosing while they were alive. I owe it to them both to try to fix this. "Because Damon is your closest connection to your humanity," I logically reason. Somehow without warning, a wave of sentimentality washes over me, and before I can stop it, I start acting nice and mushy. I pray it passes quickly, and I can chalk this up to temporary insanity.

"Your love for him transcends time, pain, death, and hatred. It is as eternal as our existence. Why do you think I wanted him to turn as well?" My question throws Stefan a little. Clearly this is a question he never let himself reflect upon. It is as if I have upset every belief that Stefan once held.

"I don't understand," Stefan states shakily. His cool exterior has melted, and now he just looks lost and dazed.

It always had to happen eventually, the moment I explained myself. I just hoped Stefan and I would be in a better place when I did, but no time like the present I suppose.

"Even in 1864, I knew that you needed your big brother more than you needed me, so I turned you both, so you wouldn't be alone while I was running. I never imagined that he would spend the rest of your eternity hating you. For that if nothing else, I am truly sorry." He budges, just a tiny bit, but it's a start.

"Thank you for the apology and for Damon," Stefan whispers, too silent to be heard by human ears.

"Ah, a glimmer of hope, just what I was waiting for," I earnestly state.

Another question seems to trouble Stefan's mind, and he starts talking before I can ask him what it is. "If you really love me like you say, why did you let me use you last night? You must have known I was only using you to make Elena jealous?"

Jealousy and anger bubble to the surface at the memory of Stefan fawning over his precious, innocent Elena. It was rather gratifying to see that idyllic image shattered forever at the sight of Elena on a date with Damon.

Without any hesitation, I admit the obvious. "Yes, I did realize that. Your caveman attempts at eliciting an emotional response were as transparent as they were foolish. They only drove Elena into your brother's arms," I remark casually.

Confusion once again enters Stefan's mind at my motives. "Then why stay with me," Stefan questions, bewildered by my behavior?

My face softens as I recount the memory. "Because there was a moment, just a moment, when you first saw me that night, where you looked in awe of me again, so that's why I stayed for the date."

"And the hate sex that nearly destroyed my bedroom," Stefan questions jokingly

"Partly I stayed because damn, you have improved since we were last together," I joke right back. "But mostly it was because right before you started tearing my clothes off, you stopped and looked into my eyes and asked if I was sure, just like you did our first time. Maybe I was feeling nostalgic, or maybe it was my turn to see something good left inside you," I explain hopefully.

Stefan's voice breaks our silence after my admission and his words sting more than I let on. "I still love Elena," Stefan confesses.

"I know that," painfully recognizing the obvious truth.

"It's going to be a long time before I can ever trust you again," Stefan states definitively.

"I know that too," I respond filled with a sense of possibility. Stefan is actually considering trusting me again. It might not be for another year or for another decade, but it's something, it is hope.

"You can't manipulate me or lie to me anymore," Stefan stipulates emphatically. "If this is going to work, we have to tell each other everything."

"No more secrets and no more lies I can live with, but no more making our exes jealous either. That stipulation is non-negotiable," I demand unquestionably.

"Deal," Stefan agrees.

I should be smiling and happy right now. The man that I love just laid down ground rules for our road to getting back together, but there is still one lie that may yet come between us. I promised honesty.

"If we're being all open, there is probably something I should tell you," I confess guiltily. "I didn't come here to help Elena kill Klaus. My initial plan was to offer Elena as a trade for my freedom. Elena only covered for me in exchange for my help against Klaus," I admit trying to muster up some remorse. It is rather difficult, since I don't feel any for my plan to hand Elena over. It was my life or hers, and I chose to save mine. What I do feel guilty for is the look of betrayal on Stefan's face. I'm sorry that I lied to him, and I'm sorry that I hurt him.

His voice reeks of disappointment as he quickly summarizes my actions. "You were going to sacrifice my girlfriend. How did you ever expect to win me back once she was dead at your hands," Stefan asks the legitimate question? I just wish I had a better answer.

"Truthfully, I was hoping I could be really sneaky about it, so you would never know it was me," I admit.

"And now you're asking me to trust you," Stefan questions indignantly? I grow defensive at his returning cool exterior.

"I could have lied," I remind him strongly. "Elena never would have told you, but I came clean. That has to count for something," I wait, silently hoping. Stefan considers my words and when he speaks, I let out a sigh of relief.

"It does mean something," he admits hesitantly. With a renewed sense of purpose, Stefan sits me down and explains our new arrangement. "Here's where we're at. We are not together. You and I are not a couple. I don't trust you. I may never trust you, but because of your honesty, I will try to find a way not to hate you. Maybe one day, I could do more than just tolerate you. But this is all you get, one last chance to prove to me that you can be trusted," Stefan finishes offering me his deal.

I'm happy beyond words, but I don't betray my true feelings except for a tiny smirk and I ask, "So what now?"

Stefan mimics my smirk and reminds me of our new mission. "Now, we find a way to save future Elena, so my brother doesn't spend the rest of eternity making our lives Hell."

"Let's get to work," I reply with a genuine smile.

**As Always Please Read and Review**


	25. Chapter 25

**For starters, I am so sorry that it took me forever to update again. It was only partially my fault. My computer broke, and it took forever to fix. I somehow broke my hard drive, no idea how I even did that. Anyway, the new episode inspired me to write my next chapter. I hope the chapters will come easier now, because I have story boarded how I want the rest of the story to go. It is kind of overwhelming, because it seems like I have at least 10 more chapters to go, but I promised myself that I would finish this, and I will. After that I will never write another long, long story again. I am strictly sticking to stories with 8 chapters or less. It keeps my motivation up. When I was mapping out the timeline of the actual story and the alternate timeline, I realized how little time has passed. We are only on Day 4 after 24 chapters, but everything has changed in those first three days. I still have to finish Days 4-7, and Day 7 will be the full moon/sacrifice. Each day encompasses several chapters, so this story could be going on forever. I tried to stick to the timeline of the show, so assuming there were a few days in between episode 2 and episode 3, this should be pretty accurate. I hope it was worth the wait, and please leave me a review. They make my day. **

Future Elena's POV

I wake up expecting to see Damon's sleeping form lying next to me, but as I look around all I see is empty space and the poor abandoned teddy bear from last night. A frown momentarily appears at his absence until I look up to see his soulful blue eyes gazing at me from the door. His arms are filled with what looks like breakfast in bed. I perk right up as he sets the tray on my lap and places an unexpected good morning kiss on my cheek.

The action takes me by surprise and I release a not so quiet gasp. Damon's face is still dangerously close to mine as we briefly share the same air. All coherent thought leaves my mind as I feel the special pull between Damon and I grow stronger with every beat of my heart. Without thinking, I grab Damon's face and crush his lips against mine. He takes a moment to recover from shock before he is kissing me back full force. The tray of food is quickly forgotten and pushed aside as Damon crawls into the bed and lingers on top of me. His hands move so quickly across my skin, and my whole body feels like it's on fire. It takes all my willpower and control to pull back.

"Bad, bad Elena," I quietly chastise myself.

Damon's playful smirk is extra wide after our little encounter, and the look on his face could best be described as glowing. "I disagree. That was very, very good my dear," Damon replies as cocky as ever. I can't help the smile that grows on my face, but it quickly becomes bittersweet when I have to remind him why what we just did was a bad idea.

"That was wrong of me and I'm sorry," I apologize sincerely. It isn't fair of me to keep doing this to him, not when he has someone else to share kisses with.

"Don't," Damon commands, his voice suddenly serious. "Don't apologize for kissing me or wanting me. You're the first person who ever has, so forgive me if I'm struggling to remember why we can't be together," Damon responds loudly.

He has that look in his eyes, the vulnerable open look that always seems to precede a hurt and wounded expression that pains me to gaze upon. Hurting Damon, causing him pain, it is like hitting a cute puppy with a stick. Once you do it, the puppy looks back at you so betrayed, like you were the one person he trusted in the whole world and you hurt him. That is what it feels like to hurt Damon. I would give almost anything to never see that look again. Sadly, I know my next words are going to hurt him. They always seem to.

I speak, not knowing if he is even listening. His back is turned, but he hasn't left yet, so clearly he is waiting for a reply. "We can't hurt her," I remind him. "You know that. I traveled across time so I could give _her _a happy ending. Do you realize how selfish it would be to try to steal that for myself," I reason calmly.

Damon turns back and pierces my soul with his question. "What if I chose you? What if this is what I want," Damon asks pleadingly?

My voice sounds tired to my own ears, despite just waking up from a restful night's sleep. "Even if it was, even if I could rationalize it to myself, there still is the ever present problem of my imminent death," I remind Damon sadly. He flinches at the mention of my dying. It is clearly a fact that he wishes to ignore. We always were both terrific at living in denial, but we both need to face reality now.

Damon's voice is now laced with determination and there is a spark that reappears behind his eyes as he speaks. "I have Stefan and Katherine helping me on this little crusade. Katherine has contacts in the witching community. They are looking for something, anything that could save you," Damon explains unwaveringly.

My shoulders slump under the weight of his hopefulness, because it kills me to crush it. "I can't be saved Damon. You need to accept it," I plead desperately.

"I can't," Damon chokes out. Tears fill his eyes and I reach my hand up to brush them away, and he grabs it, holding it within his own. "Please, just let me try," Damon begs. He's never going to let this go. This is the same man who spent almost a century and a half trying to reunite with Katherine. He didn't give up on her. It was foolish to think I could convince him to give up on me.

"There might be one way," I admit cautiously. I don't want to give Damon false hope, but I can't bear him spending our last days together chasing a cure that doesn't exist. "You have to promise me something first," I stipulate.

Hope is renewed in his eyes and he hangs on my every word. "Anything," Damon agrees without hesitation.

I take a heavy breath before continuing. "If I can be helped, there is only one way," I explain. "If it doesn't work out, if they say that I can't be saved, promise me that you'll let this go. If you can't promise that, I won't tell you what I know," I offer my ultimatum resolutely.

Once the words leave my mouth, I see the look again. Damon stares at me betrayed and hurt. He doesn't understand and likely never will. "You would do that? You would sacrifice your one chance at life, for what," Damon furiously demands?

My defensive streak rears its ugly head, and I start yelling right back. "For actually living in what little time I have left, that is what I would sacrifice all hope for. These witches _might _be able to save me, but if they can't than no one can. So promise me or let it go," I request, begging him to accept.

Damon runs his hands through his hair and starts pacing in the room. His voice breaks in the silence, and his words reignite bitterness in me that I had hoped died long ago. "You know you're really not being fair," Damon accuses.

A few words and I'm right back to where I was before, before the time travel and the therapy. Seven words are all it took to reawaken my angry feelings towards Stefan, towards the world, towards everyone.

"I learned a long time ago that fairness has nothing to do with it," I bitterly state. "I was sixteen years old when I became an orphan. What was fair about that? At seventeen, my birth mother, birth father, and my Aunt Jenna all died in less than a month. Show me the fairness and the justice in the world. I had to watch the man that I loved die right in front of my eyes as I stared on helpless to stop it. Preach to me now about the fairness of that day. Every family member I ever had and every friend I ever knew, save for Caroline, died a horrible death because they knew me, because they loved me. This world wasn't made to be fair," I claim cynically.

Damon makes no moves to disagree or dispute my claims. He knows far too much about the injustice of the world. For all my complaining, at least I had that many people who loved me. Damon's injustice is that it took 145 years for someone to finally see him and love him just as he was. I wonder what is worse, losing so many people that you love, or living lifetimes all alone. If it was up to me, I would take my cursed existence over his any day. It makes all the sense in the world that once he found that love that he would cling to it, and it is wrong of me to get angry at him for trying to keep me a little longer.

Damon's movement back to the bed shakes me from my inner thoughts. He sits down and after carefully considering his words, he agrees to my request. "I just need some hope," Damon explains. "If these witches say there is nothing they can do, I will try to accept that. I make no promises, but for you, I will try," Damon concedes with great difficulty.

Wanting to quickly move past the emotional intensity of the moment, I give him all the information that he needs to seek a little witchy help. "Tell Bonnie to go to the site where Emily Bennett was killed," I inform him quickly. "It is the site of a witch massacre. There are 1000 dead witches who she can ask for help. After that, tell her to swing by the boardinghouse. I need to hold another group pow wow," I instruct clinically and detached.

"What is this one about," Damon questions curiously, surprised and concerned by my sudden change in demeanor and topic.

"Staying in Mystic Falls when Klaus is on his way is too dangerous," I state plainly. "I'm sending Caroline, Tyler, Jeremy, Alaric, and Jenna on an extended vacation."

"Tyler doesn't even know about the supernatural. How were you planning on convincing him to attend your very dysfunctional family outing," Damon asks with a heavy dose of sarcasm?

"Compulsion always works," I offer as a solution. Damon looks taken aback at the suggestion. I don't know why he's surprised. I've asked him to compel my brother before. Desperate times call for desperate measures, and free will is a luxury that my loved ones cannot afford.

"Do you really expect everyone to just leave you right when you tell them that you are in danger," Damon points out, not realizing my true intentions?

"When I said compulsion, I meant all of them," I admit unapologetically. "Jenna started wearing a vervain necklace Alaric gave her after she found out about all this. Everyone else wears their vervain. It could be easily removed," I recommend.

"What about the blonde Barbie," Damon questions, clearly still unsure about my plan?

"I can convince Caroline it is the right thing to do, if I leave out a few details about the danger I am in," I answer confidently.

The mood is again tense with anxiety. It is flowing out of Damon and filling the room. His tone is worried and pitying as he speaks to me.

"Elena, if we aren't successful, if the witches can't save you, you will never see your family and friends again. Do you really want to miss out on what could be your last days without them," Damon asks uncertain?

"Of course I don't want to. The selfish part of me wants to keep them close, but they died once because Klaus used them against me and against Stefan, I swore that would never happen again. They need to leave," I state firmly.

For a moment, Damon just stares at me. It takes me a second to recognize the expression on his face. To my surprise, it is absolute wonder and awe. It makes me feel uncomfortable, so I ask, "Why are you staring?"

"I'm just amazed sometimes," Damon answers cryptically.

"By what," I ask hoping for more elaboration?

"By you," Damon replies sweetly. "As a vampire, you see lifetimes worth of selfishness and cruelty. You start to forget there is more to the world than just evil, but you remind me of mankind's capacity for selflessness and honor in a world devoid of all virtue."

It's my turn to be speechless and in awe. What does a person say to that? What words could express what I'm feeling right now. Love, adoration, and gratitude fail to express the appreciation I feel towards whatever higher power saw fit to bring this man into my life. I settle on a hug, because words always seemed to fail us, but actions never did. "You don't have to be scared you know," I whisper in his ear.

He looks back at me bewildered at what I could mean. "Scared of what," Damon asks genuinely confused?

"You don't have to be scared that the other me won't love you. I know that's why you're so afraid of me dying, but you don't have to worry. There could be a thousand versions of me from different timelines or realities and every single one would still choose you," I assure him.

Damon brushes my hair from my face and states, "If there were a thousand versions of you, and they were here with me, I would try and save every last one of them," Damon promises before placing a lingering kiss on my forehead. "I have to call Bonnie, and you need to eat your breakfast," he reminds me. I eat my breakfast and allow myself to wish impossible things, to wish that somehow the witches could grant me mercy and allow me to live. Even if I wasn't kissing Damon or going on dates with him or holding hands, his presence, the strength of his love was enough to live for.


	26. Chapter 26

**I know, I know, I'm terrible for not updating lately, but I have been busy with another story that is a lot easier to write. This is also shorter than I wanted, but it took forever to get back into the groove of things. My goal is to update again on Thursday, so I won't make you wait too long. I also hope to finish my other story **_**Love Mistakes and Cowardice **_**by then. I hope you all enjoy.**

Future Elena's POV

Once my breakfast is finished and cleaned up, I glance quickly at my phone only to discover seven missed calls all from the same number, Caroline. I listen intently to the messages that she left, and judging by the barely comprehensible words that I detect in between crying, I assume that her and Matt broke up last night. The stress of her transformation and something Stefan said to her, apparently led to a big blow out.

A part of me feels awful for the pain that Caroline must be facing right now in midst of all she is dealing with, but the other part remembers Matt rejecting her after finding out what she truly was. This breakup was inevitable ever since Caroline turned and she was no longer the normal teenage girlfriend Matt wanted. I want to call her, comfort her, and tell her this is all for the best, but there are more pressing and life threatening issues to deal with, so instead I text current Elena to catch her up on all the drama. After half hour without a reply, I text Jeremy. He informs me that Elena lost her phone last night, which explains why Caroline hadn't just talked to her directly. I finally deliver my message through Jeremy, confident that Caroline will be taken care of.

This little hiccup does however put a small kink in my plan. I don't know how I forgot about Matt. He is the only one that I didn't consider with this whole forced vacation scenario. Matt can't just take off from the grill. He needs the money and a vacation with his now ex-girlfriend might be a little awkward. When Damon comes striding into the room, a new idea forms. I give my best innocent doe eyed impression with a tiny hint of a smile.

"I know that look," Damon states skeptically. "That look always spells trouble for me. What do you want?" Damon questions cautiously, like I'm about to ask him to step outside without his daylight ring.

"I need a favor," I explain in my best playful voice, so Damon knows this isn't a matter of life or death. Damon smiles a little at my behavior, apparently finding me quite funny, which should help my cause.

"Past, present, or future, you certainly ask a lot of favors Miss Gilbert," Damon jokes teasingly. "The whole possibly dying gives you a bit of a trump card, so I am in your service. What can I do for you?" I ignore Damon's attempt at making light of the very serious ramifications of my time travel, because I know he is just hiding how much our conversation last night hurt him. He's scared of losing me, and he'll grant my every request. I feel terribly guilty for taking advantage of that, but I don't think I have another option. Matt's life is at risk, and it's not as if I'm trying to manipulate him.

"I need you to send Matt on a vacation?" I ask, with just a hint of begging in my voice.

"I thought we were already doing that." Damon reminds me, confused at the direction of the conversation.

"That was before Caroline and Matt broke up. They need to go on separate vacations," I elaborate further. Damon's face doesn't change. It maintains the same quizzical stare from moments ago.

"So what do you need from me?" Damon asks expectantly.

"I need you to compel Matt to leave, and I sort of need you to pay for his trip," I reply carefully. I know it is a lot to ask, especially considering I never got the impression that Damon ever really liked Matt, but I'm hoping he will at least do it for me.

"So let me get this straight," Damon summarizes in an attempt to understand, "you want me to compel your ex-boyfriend to take a vacation from his dull life of school and washing dishes, and you want me to pay for it." Damon finishes his analysis of the situation, and I feel a lot less confident at my prospects of getting him to agree.

"Pretty much," I admit sheepishly.

"Okay," Damon responds, like he just agreed to pick up a check for coffee.

"Just like that, no begging or groveling required," I inquire skeptically. Damon's smirk reappears and he oozes so much charm and sex that it almost makes me melt.

"I don't know if you've heard, but I'm sort of loaded, and I doubt time traveling pays all that well as a career, so it's not like _you_ can pay for his tickets and accommodations. Plus I sort of owe him one for my part in what happened to Vicki, so I'll do it." I catch the tiniest flicker of regret at the mention of Vicki's name, but I choose to let it go, because I know Damon doesn't want to talk about her tragic end, and the guilt I know he still feels for her death. Instead I pull him into another one of our infamous hugs.

"You're the best. You know that." His regret is quickly replaced with arrogance at my compliment, and I'm happy to ease his troubled mind.

"I really, really am." Damon replies as cocky as ever, just the way he should be. I don't let the moment hang on for too long, since we do have pressing issues to attend to.

"So did you get ahold of Bonnie?" I inquire casually, not wanting to make a big deal over the sole hope for my survival.

"I did," Damon replies, "and she promised to come over once she was done with her witchy juju." We both ease into a comfortable back and forth, since neither of us want to delve once more into the angsty melodrama that has infected our every waking moment together for the past couple of days.

"Did you tell Stefan and Katherine about the vacation plan?" I question, hoping that they weren't too difficult.

"Yes and after ten minutes of perfunctory arguing, they agreed." Damon replies frustrated, and I surmise it wasn't exactly a fun conversation for him. Things between him and Stefan have been tense at best and antagonistic at worst. I'm grateful he tolerated Stefan's not so subtle digs just to secure his help.

"I'm going to text everyone to meet me here." I inform Damon, once more taking control of the situation.

"You might want to have them come one by one instead of as a group." Damon suggests thoughtfully. "You start compelling one of your loved ones, the others might get ideas and stage a jail break." Damon jokes sarcastically.

"You're right I'll stagger their arrivals, so we can compel them one at a time." Damon's face changes in an instant, and I know there is something he wants to say.

"You know you don't have to do this." Damon reminds me with sadness etched in every word. He still thinks this is a bad idea to send them away, but it is too big a risk to keep them here.

"I do have to do this." I answer confidently, trying to hide the doubts still plaguing my mind. "It's the only way that I know they'll all be safe." Damon gazes lovingly into my eyes and pushes my hair back behind my ears. His voice so soft and tender brings me more comfort than he knows.

"Let me give you a little bit of free advice from someone who's seen their fair share of death and loss," Damon offers. "Say goodbye to them before we compel them."

"They won't remember it." I remind him miserably. What would be the point? All that would do is make things more dramatic than they need to be. Considering Damon's usual desire to keep the emotion out of things, I can't help but question his advice.

"No, they won't remember," Damon concedes. But you will, and if you do die in the next week or the next month, you'll want closure. You'll want them to know, even on an unconscious level how much you loved them. Remember the compulsion can take away the memories, but not the feelings. If you're going to be aggravatingly selfless, at least take time for this small comfort."

I don't question Damon further. It is such a sweet thought, that I wouldn't even know where to begin to disagree, so I nod my head in consent. "Okay, I think I'm ready to say goodbye. I'll text Ric first. He will be the first one to get suspicious, so we should start with him."

It hurts so much to think about finally saying goodbye to the man who was like a second father to me. I brush away the stray tear that falls upon my face and bravely try to face losing my loved ones all over again.


	27. Chapter 27

**Okay, so I finally kept a promise to you guys. Here is the next chapter. I am trying so hard to keep a regular pace with this, but it gets harder the longer this story goes on. I know that there are at least 300 people who still read each chapter, and I am grateful to each and every one of you. I want to give a special shout out to Imoen Grace for reviewing last chapter, especially since not a lot happened. I wanted to give you guys a little more substance with this chapter, and I hope that I succeeded. I hope you all enjoy. **

Future Elena's POV

There was a lot of convincing, evading, and lying, but eventually everyone agreed to meet me at the boardinghouse at their assigned time. The people I love trusted me, and while this should fill me with joy, it only makes me feel worse for manipulating them and taking their free will away. If the roles were reversed and Damon or Stefan did this to me, it would take me weeks to forgive that betrayal of trust. Hypocrisy doesn't even begin to cover my actions, but I can't dwell on my inner contradictions, when the doorbell signals the arrival of my first victim.

Alaric is at the door confused and worried about my sudden pleas for him to come over, and once I see his trusting, concerned face, my resolve starts to weaken. I hold on to just enough strength to allow him inside, and he takes a seat opposite me on the couch. I don't say anything for a while. I just sit across from Alaric as he fills the silence with questions.

"Elena, what's wrong? Are you in trouble? Is someone else in trouble?" He asks, clearly troubled by my ominous reluctance to speak.

Alaric Saltzman, always the defender, the fixer, and the one we call when we need a hand. My only comfort in compelling him is that through my deceit he might get a chance at the life he always wanted, a life with my Aunt Jenna, a life filled with marriage and babies, a life that was taken away because he stayed to take care of me and Jeremy.

Ric's next words come out desperate and demanding, impatient for me to finally say something. "Please just stop with the silent stares, because you're scaring the Hell out of me," Alaric admits terrified. I make a move to sit next to him and grab ahold of his hand. He looks puzzled by my sudden gesture, and his shock allows me to gently pull out the vervain that he always keeps in his pocket. I speak strongly and warmly to my old friend, knowing it will likely be for the last time.

"I need you to know that back where I came from, in the future, you were more to me than just my history teacher, or my aunt's boyfriend, or another warrior in our fight against supernatural forces set to destroy us. You were also my friend, my protector, and I loved you like a father," I confess with the hint of a tear in my eyes. Alaric is floored by my admission, since in this time, we really weren't that close.

"Elena, I don't know what to say," Ric states softly, not sure what to do with himself at the moment.

"You don't have to say anything," I state, because I don't need any words to let me know how much he cares about me. His actions showed me that every day. "I just needed you to know." I back away, putting some distance between myself and Ric as I allow Damon to take control. He catches Ric's gaze and I can see the shift as the compulsion takes hold.

"Ric, you're going to be going away for a while," Damon tells Ric in a calming voice that I find hypnotizing. "You and Jenna decided to organize a little trip for Elena's friends. Katherine, Stefan, Caroline, Jeremy, and Tyler are coming along, but Elena is too busy to leave right now. You will visit some place warm and do annoying touristy things, and you won't come back until I tell you to return."

"I won't come back until you tell me to return," Alaric repeats back verbatim.

"I know you won't," Damon states before releasing him. Ric simply stands up and leaves without another word, his mind too confused for him to process what just happened, all that he knows is that he needs to start packing for his trip.

Damon comes up behind me and rubs circles on my back, which I lean into gratefully.

"Ready for our next appointment?" Damon asks after he hears footsteps coming up towards the door.

"As I'll ever be," I respond weakly, barely standing after my emotional goodbye to Alaric. Jenna raps loudly on the door. Once I open it, she barges in talking frantically.

"Elena, what is going on? Ric walked out of here like a zombie. You ask me to show up here without even a decent explanation as to why. What is the big secret?" Jenna questions me in huff. I promised her no more secrets and no more lies, what a liar I turned out to be. Not even home a week and I am already lying to her and going behind her back all over again. At l least I comfort myself in knowing that this will be the last time. I motion for her to take Ric's former spot on the couch.

"Just sit down and I'll explain," I urge, telling Jenna a half-truth. My voice cracks as I begin my second goodbye speech to someone that I love.

"You did a great job raising me and Jeremy after the accident. You were strong and resilient. I learned so much from watching you and trying to imitate that strength. Your whole world after my parents died was about taking care of me and Jeremy. Consider this me finally taking care of you." Before Jenna has a chance to question my speech or my meaning, I am removing her vervain necklace. I give her one last hug and whisper that I love her before Damon takes my place at Jenna's side. He stares into Jenna's eyes and repeats the same compulsion he did on Ric. Once he finishes, she gets right up and walks out the door just like Alaric.

Damon and I have a few minutes to wait alone before Tyler shows up. I don't say anything and neither does Damon, probably sensing that I don't want to talk about what we just did. Damon simply takes my hand and holds it within his own. It is such a small gesture, so normal and ordinary, but with him, nothing feels ordinary. I draw strength from him in that moment, and it helps me to keep fighting on against the pain.

Tyler's sudden knock is loud and commanding. It makes me jump a little in fear. I open the door and Tyler looks confused and maybe a little upset.

"You've got two minutes to explain what I'm doing here Elena," Tyler demands forcefully as he steps inside without another word.

Damon scoffs at Tyler's attitude and he remarks, "You're dead set on saving _this _guy, really?" Damon asks his question with a heavy dose of disbelief.

"Not helping." I remind him gently. The last thing I need is him scaring Tyler away.

"What are you two even talking about?" Tyler interrupts angrily. "Elena you invite me to your ex-boyfriend's house, out of the blue, when you and I have barely hung out since you broke up with Matt, and now I see you've invited this guy to our little talk. I don't even like this guy." Tyler confesses while gesturing towards Damon.

Somehow I settle him down enough to take a seat, and I thank my lucky stars that we never gave Tyler any vervain. He already is freaked out enough. The last thing we need is me removing something from his body without his consent. I don't take time to explain or help Tyler understand. I just begin my pre-practiced speech in my head as Tyler looks on confused.

"You're a good guy Tyler, despite everything that's happened to you," I admit to his surprise. This is before his relationship with Caroline, before he knows that his anger issues are outside his control, and this is probably the first time that he has heard someone call him a good person. He appears enormously grateful, and I am happy that I can give him something after all that he has suffered; all I have left to give him is my hope for the future. "The best side of you won out in the end, and I wish only good things for you in life."

"Are you dying?" Tyler asks unexpectedly. "Is that what the speech is about?" I can't help but laugh, because he is right. Why else would anyone give these types of speeches?

"Sort of," I admit sadly, "but that doesn't matter right now."

I scoot over as Damon works his magic and Tyler leaves as well. Matt runs into him as he is leaving and just walks through the open door.

"Why was Tyler here?" Matt asks confused. "Why am I here? I had to call someone to cover my shift, because you said it was important."

"Please just sit down Matt," I request gently, never one to doubt me, he takes a seat willingly.

"Is something wrong?" Matt questions, alarmed by the nature of our meeting.

"There always seems to be something wrong, some imminent danger," I note reflectively, "but through all of it you held steady. I needed to thank you for that. You helped me so much by just being the one normal thing in my life. I know that it was hard for you when I gave up on us and it was hard for you to watch me with Stefan, but that didn't stop you from being protective and understanding when I needed you. I'm sorry if knowing me made your life worse." All Matt claimed to want was a normal life with normal friends; instead he met me and fell in love with a supernatural doppelganger and then a newbie vampire. It's hard not to think he would have been better off hundreds of miles away from me.

"You're wrong," Matt contradicts me strongly. "I still don't know what this is about, and you're sort of scaring me with all this, but you have to know that your presence in my life _was always_ and _will always_ be a welcome one. I'm always going to be here," Matt reassures me. Damon senses I am on the brink of a breakdown and jumps in.

"Okay, I think that's enough soulful bonding, compulsion time." Matt wasn't on vervain, so it made things much simpler. I slipped some money into Matt's pocket as Damon started. "You recently just got a small inheritance from a long lost relative. You are going to use the money to finally take a much needed vacation from being boring." I shoot a disapproving stare in Damon's direction, but I don't think he notices. "Pack a bag, plan a trip, and don't come back till I tell you to," Damon commands.

After Matt leaves, I drop onto the couch and try to remember how to breathe. Each one of these goodbyes just makes everything harder. Damon prepares me a glass of bourbon from his vast collection of alcohol, and I accept it with gratitude.

"Last one," Damon reminds me, hopeful that it will cheer me up. He just doesn't realize that this will be the hardest one. I sent Jeremy away to Denver in my time to protect him, but still Klaus found him and brutally tortured him to death. The image of those polaroids that Klaus showed me of his handiwork will haunt me for the rest of my life, even if that is only for another couple days. I'm his big sister. I should have protected him better, controlled Stefan, something that would have saved him. But I can't keep punishing myself for my failures, if I save Jeremy now that is all that matters.

Another knock, signals my brother's arrival, and I take another breath before answering the door. Jeremy walks in immediately, repeating the same questions I've heard over and over again. "What's up, you said it was important when you called?" Jeremy asks curiously. We move over to the compulsion couch and take a seat next to each other.

"I asked you here to tell you what a great little brother you've been," I confess, while surreptitiously slipping off Jeremy's bracelet.

"Oh, my God you're dying," Jeremy states, fear clouding his face.

"I try and give you a compliment and you jump straight to deathbed confession," I respond, almost insulted. Ironic that he's right, of course.

"Give me another reason Elena, because you're scaring me," Jeremy replies genuinely. I stare back at him with sympathy and pity. Everyone keeps dying on him, and he lives in constant fear that one day, he's going to lose me too.

"I wish I could," I admit regretfully, "but you're right I could die. That doesn't mean that you need to die along with me. I dragged you into this enough. If it wasn't for me, you could have had a normal life, and I want that for you." Jeremy looks like he wants to argue, claim that he was a Gilbert and his life would never be normal, but I don't give him the chance. This wasn't the conversation I brought him here to have, and we need to get on with the compulsion before I lose it.

"I guess the only thing there is left to say is that I love you and I'm sorry for doing this to you again." My admission of guilt is sincere, but irrelevant, since it won't stop me from messing with his mind again. Damon finishes his last bit of compulsion and Jeremy walks out the door to join the others in packing.

I don't hold back now. There is no one left to be strong for anymore. Damon will let me be weak for a while, because he knows how much I desperately need it.

"Tell me I did the right thing," I beg. "Tell me I didn't just make another monumental mistake." Damon soothes me as he holds me tighter.

"You didn't," he promises softly. "All of those people that we just compelled are lucky to have you in their lives. We all are."

"You really think I'm worth all this effort?" I ask, my insecurities rising to the surface as I try to stifle my tears.

"Yes," Damon replies without thinking, "you're worth even more than you know."

After another minute of standing in that spot, Damon breaks the silence. "I should probably let you go, before we get ourselves in trouble again."

"You probably should," I agree, "but I don't want you to just yet. Please just give me another minute." Damon complies without another word, but two minutes pass, and I still can't pull away.

"The longer we stay like this, the harder it's going to be to walk away," Damon reminds me miserably. I gaze in his eyes, and in a moment of weakness, while our faces are too close together, and we are staring at each other's lips, I want to kiss him. I don't consider it because I desperately desire him, even though I do. I consider it because in my lowest moment, I need to know that I am still alive, that I'm still here. Damon makes me feel more alive than anyone. I lean in fully intent of closing the distance between us. That is until we both hear someone clearing their throat in the doorway. I separate quickly from Damon, once I realize my past self is staring at us sadly, obviously having seen our little moment.

"Anyone want to fill me in," she asks expectantly. I freeze in utter terror at what I almost did, and what she must think of me, so I do what I do best lately, I flee.

**As Always Please Read and Review**


	28. Chapter 28

**Thank you so much for everyone who reviewed the last chapter. It really helped motivate me to write the next one. I hope you all enjoy.**

Current Elena's POV

After my future self's quick exit, Damon and I are left alone to navigate the awkwardness by ourselves.

"It wasn't as bad as it looked," Damon claims quickly. The guilt written all over his face, just proves that he himself thinks that it was wrong to nearly kiss her.

I'm still struggling to define the right and wrong in this situation. What are the rules with something like this? It's not like he found some hot floozy in a bar. He was kissing a future version of me. I may not know if I have a right to be upset, but I can easily recognize the piping hot jealousy that flowed through my veins at seeing him touching someone else. The strength of it all confuses me, because three days ago, Damon was nothing more than my boyfriend's older brother. Okay, he might have meant more to me than that, but I certainly didn't get openly jealous over who he was almost kissing. One really hot make out session, and suddenly I'm the jealous girlfriend. How did that happen? The anger and hurt fill my voice when I finally find the words to confront Damon.

"Really, cause it looked like you were about to kiss her a day after kissing me." I try to appear unaffected, but all I feel is betrayed, and my voice can't conceal my inner vulnerability. Last night he made it seem like I was the only girl in the world for him, but today we were both too quickly reminded that there is still one person who will always come between us, future me.

Damon is completely oblivious to the thoughts swirling around in my head. He appears caught in a struggle between feeling guilty for causing me pain and wanting to fix it, with the right words, the right argument.

"She was upset and sad," Damon reasons, "and I don't think you can really be mad at me for cheating on you with you." His voice raises as he outlines the sheer absurdity of our circumstances.

"I know it's ridiculous," I concede, "and at times I feel like an idiot for being jealous, but I can't help but feel like you want _her_ more than you want me." Damon's face softens as I expose my innermost thoughts for him to see.

"You're the same person." He contends, frustrated by this whole fucked up mess.

"In most ways, you're right," I admit, "but there are still aspects of her that are different. She's more confident than me, more certain than me, and more jaded than I am. She's more like you than I am."

That seems to be the core of our problem. Future Elena's experiences, while horrible, made her the perfect match for Damon. She was just as damaged and broken as he was. It seemed fate was playing a cruel joke on them both. They're right for each other, but only in a time where she doesn't belong.

"You don't need to worry about her and me," Damon attempts to reassure me. "What you saw was a moment of weakness, one I assure you she is currently feeling hopelessly guilty about. She already made her intentions very clear. She doesn't want to come between us."

"But you still love her?" I ask without needing an answer. Seeing them interact with each other these past few days is all the evidence I need.

"I do," Damon confesses softly. He bows his head down, afraid to look me in the eyes, like he did something wrong, when his only mistake was wanting every version of me. Isn't that the definition of destined to be together? Despite all circumstances that change or how we evolve differently; we're still drawn to each other, like moths to a flame. I'm just worried about which one of us gets burned in the end. I don't know if its curiosity or masochism to ask the one question that has bothered me for days, but I feel I need to know the truth.

"Do you love _me_?" I barely whisper and Damon's head shoots up to gaze at me in shock. We never really talked about it after Isobel all but told me that he did. It seemed like a landmine that would blow up in our faces if we took one wrong step, but I always was one to run headlong into a problem without considering the consequences.

"We're treading into dangerous territory now Elena," Damon warns with a hardened look on his face. "You and Stefan just broke up. Your future self is complicating your life and we are just starting whatever it is that we are to each other. So ask yourself if you're ready to know the answer just yet." A part of me wants to scream yes. A part of me needs to hear it, just once to make it real, but those aren't the only parts of me.

"I'm not," I admit ashamed. "I wish that I was, and I'm sorry for putting you in this position, but it's still too soon." Damon's face falls once the words come out. He expected them, but I can see a tiny bit of hope bloomed that maybe I was ready after all. "I do need you to know that I'm getting there," I claim, hoping that it will serve as some consolation. "One day I'll ask again, and maybe I can give you the answer that you want." Damon nods in a sort of sad acceptance. It isn't what he wanted, but for today, it's enough.

"That day can't come soon enough," Damon states, clearly heartbroken at the rejection. "Grant me one request and don't ask me again until you _are_ ready, because I can't stand lying to you."

I nod in agreement. The subject is closed, for now, and it gives us time to worry about other matters.

"You want to tell me what's so earth shatteringly awful that future me couldn't help falling into your arms." My best attempts to not sound jealous fail, but Damon skips past it to answer my question.

"Which bit of awful news would you like to hear first?" Damon asks casually. "Would you like to hear how Klaus is coming soon and Elena felt it necessary for me to compel her loved ones to flee, or how about how her very life is hanging in the balance if she changes too much in our time?"

No words, I have no words to describe the feeling of knowing the woman that I was jealous of thirty seconds ago might die. Damon tries to hide how much this is destroying him inside, but he already admitted to loving her, the prospect of losing her so soon seems too cruel. I jump into proactive mode rather than wallow in sadness.

"What are we going to do? We have to save her?" Damon seems a bit surprised by my shift in attitude.

"I thought you were mad at her a second ago." Damon questions, confused at my behavior.

"I was angry and hurt," I confess, "but that doesn't mean I want her to die. She risked everything, including her own life to come back and save the people that I love. It's not right to let her suffer just for doing the right thing."

"You still haven't brought up your thoughts on me compelling your nearest and dearest," Damon points out, nervous about my response. I was so focused on Future Elena's possible death that I didn't even think about the compulsion. Honestly, it sounds a lot like something that I would do.

"I'm not mad at you for compelling them," I admit to Damon's relief. "If it means that they're safe, I can live with that. What I don't like is the fact that Elena seems to be pushing everyone away. It's not healthy." Damon scoffs a little at the idea.

"I think we have to grade on a curve when it comes to things like this."

He has a point. Who am I to decide what's healthy for my time traveling future self who's lost nearly every single person that she loved.

"She's just scared of losing them all over again," Damon explains reflectively. "I think we all need to cut her some slack." He states pointedly.

"You mean I do."

"I think she cares a Hell of a lot about your happiness, and appreciating her sacrifices wouldn't be uncalled for." He just had to resort to the guilt trip, my kryptonite.

"It's just hard sometimes," I explain sadly, "because as much as she apologizes for intruding in on my life, at times I feels like I'm intruding on hers. I can't even start something with you, without feeling like I'm _stealing _you from her, because you two have this thing between you and it is intense and undeniable. It feels like you two are the ones who are supposed to be together, and I'm the third wheel in this epic love story." Damon is instantly concerned and defensive about what I said.

"She's still you," Damon claims, "no matter what you say. The connection between us was instantaneous, because of the feelings I already had for _you_. I love her for the same reasons that I lo . . . care for you," Damon corrects himself quickly. "We could have that connection, that intensity. It's already there. You felt it the night of the carnival. I know you did."

"I did and I still do," I confess honestly, "but I don't know how to be with you with her here." Damon just stares at me in disbelief, like this couldn't really be happening.

"You're not breaking up with me too are you," Damon asks pleadingly, "because that face of yours has rejected me a lot in the past couple days?" It kills me to cause him a moment's pain, but I don't' want to be the one that gets hurt in this either.

"Until this is settled, until we know whether future Elena is staying for good, I don't think that we should be together like that." Anger rises in Damon's voice, and his words cut into me more than I let on.

"You two are killing me here," Damon states, clearly pained. "You're both too damn selfless to hurt the other, so you just keep hurting me instead."

"I'm sorry," I mumble. My speech becomes harder to hear as I fight against the tears and the emotion of the moment. "I do want you. I want what you and she have, but I don't want to always be wondering if I'm your second choice."

"Am I interrupting something?" Both of our heads swing in the direction of the door to see Bonnie standing there awkwardly. The moment is broken and I'm a little grateful for her arrival. If I had to keep convincing Damon that we shouldn't be together, I might cave, and I was far too afraid that it would end in my own heartbreak. Damon tears his eyes away from mine to stare back at Bonnie in annoyance.

"Yes," Damon admits with a heavy sigh, "but since I've been waiting on you to arrive, you're forgiven. What did you find out?" I stand still in my spot confused at what's going on, and why Damon and Bonnie are working together. Neither one attempts to fill me in, so I just listen intently for clues as to what is going on.

"I think I found a spell that can help future Elena," Bonnie claims. Damon and I just look at each other, not needing words. We both are thinking the same thing. There is joy at the prospect of saving her, but also a sense of dread as for what this means for the two of us. If Future Elena stays, how can we ever be together?

**As Always Please Read and Review**


	29. Chapter 29

**Two updates in two days. Yay, I'm proud of myself. Thank you to everyone who reviewed the last chapter. You guys are what keep me writing. I hope you all enjoy.**

Future Elena's POV

So it's official, I'm a coward, a little scaredy cat, too afraid to face my past self that I feel the need to sprint out the door at the first sign of trouble. I told myself that I wouldn't come between Damon and the other me, but the second I'm tested, my promises and morals fly out the window. Anytime I feel happy or sad or lonely, I seek Damon out for comfort me or kiss me. It's just habit, but if I have any hopes of making things right between my past self and Damon, it is a habit I need to break. I'm the one who pushed Current Elena and Damon together and now one moment of weakness threatens to tear them apart, and I don't even stay to fix things.

In order to take my mind off my cowardice and my increasingly conflicted feelings about letting Damon go, I visit Caroline to fill her in on the her travel plans, since she was too sad about Matt to come to the boardinghouse. I'm hoping she isn't too upset about my compelling my friends and family, because I don't know how well I'd handle another battle with someone that I love.

Caroline answers the door holding a tub of ice cream in one hand and a copy of The Notebook in the other. Once she sees me, Caroline wraps her arms around me in a tight embrace. "You're the best friend a girl could ask for," Caroline remarks "checking on me after my breakup, especially after the other you already stopped by. I don't know what she told you, but I'm fine, really. Matt and I are done and that is fine. Everything's fine."

"Caroline I didn't come to talk to you about Matt," I cut her off, before she keeps talking about what a 'good friend' I am or how 'fine' she is.

"Then why are you here?" Caroline asks, puzzled and concerned about whatever imminent disaster compelled me to visit.

"There's trouble coming and I need to know that the people that I love are safe."

"What do you need from me?" Caroline asks, always the protective mama bear of the group, willing to help where needed.

"I asked Damon to compel everyone to go on a vacation," I explain, pretending to be unaffected, not wanting to think about possibly never seeing them again. "Matt already left town to travel on his own, but all the other defenseless humans in my life are currently packing a bag to go to some unknown tropical location. I need you to leave with Stefan and Katherine to keep everyone safe." Caroline's eyes grow wider and her mouth drops open in shock.

"No, absolutely not," Caroline replies adamantly. "Putting aside the fact that you took away the choices of people who love you, I cannot agree to leave my best friends alone when ominous danger is headed straight for you, not an option." She sounds a lot like Damon when she's determined. That is exactly what he would say if I asked him to leave. I just have to find the work around, the Caroline logic that will help her understand that this is necessary.

"Bonnie and I won't be alone," I promise quickly. "Damon is staying and I have an old friend named Elijah who is a thousand year old vampire who has two very powerful witches on his side. Bonnie and I will be fine," I assure my old friend as I grab hold of her hand and give it a little squeeze to soothe her. It doesn't work, because Caroline's voice reaches those high tones that only appear when she is upset by something.

"If there really is no danger, why do we need to leave at all?" Caroline questions frantically.

"Because everyone knows that the best way to get to me is through my friends or family," I remind her gently. Too many scenarios rush through my head. I have to stop to think if anyone in my life has not been kidnapped. "It already happened when Isobel kidnapped Jeremy. I won't have that happen again. You all need to go," I command forcefully.

"I still have a bad feeling about this." Caroline declares with a queasy look that could be mistaken for nausea on a human being.

"I know," I reply, recognizing how hard this is for her. "It goes against every fiber of your being to run away, but you're part of this now. Whether you wanted it or not, the moment you decided to become a vampire, you became a supernatural creature. You became integral to the survival of everyone around you. It is your duty to keep them safe from harm. That is your burden, as it is mine. Besides the time away could be good for you, it will give you plenty of time to work with Stefan on controlling your blood lust, and you can have a few days away from Matt to deal with your breakup. Everybody wins and everybody lives." I struggle to maintain a hopeful tone in my voice, praying that Caroline buys it.

"You sure that you'll be okay?" Caroline asks one last time.

"Promise," I lie convincingly to my best friend. I won't be alright. Odds are I'll be long gone before she gets back, but I can't tell her that or she'll never leave my side and she has to, not just to protect all their lives, but to protect her own.

"Good, because if you die on me, I'll never forgive you," Caroline jokes lightheartedly. I feel awful for lying, but I just have to remember that she's not really losing me. She's just losing the backup me. I hug her for what is likely the last time and I remove myself from her embrace. I know I need to talk to my past self, try and clear things up, so I head towards the house, only to see three impatient people already waiting for me.

"What are you three doing here?" I ask confused at their little outdoor meeting.

"Last I checked I live here," Current Elena responds sarcastically.

"I'm sorry I didn't mean." I stumble on my own words as I try to figure out how to talk to her after what I did. "I was just surprised to see you all waiting out here. Is something wrong?" Damon rises to speak with me and one look in his eyes tells me that his guard is up. Something happened after I left, something bad, and it is all my fault. If I had just stuck to my earlier plan, Current Elena and Damon wouldn't be fighting right now. Damon's voice sounds far too harsh and uncaring to my ears.

"There's plenty wrong in the world today, global warming, debt crisis, civil wars, but unlike your nightly news, we're here to deliver good news," Damon proclaims with a fake smile. Damon isn't really happy. Elena won't even look him in the eyes. Whatever happened during that fight, it must have hurt Damon very deeply. I know I caused this, whatever is broken between them, but I can't help but feel as if he's punishing me by shutting me out.

"Damon," I try reasoning with him, "I understand if you're mad about . . ."

"Doesn't really matter right now," Damon interjects abruptly. "We have more important things to deal with than doppelganger love triangle drama if we want to keep you alive." My hopes rise a tiny bit at the thought that I could be saved, but judging by the less than joyful expressions on their faces, there is more to it than that.

"I don't actually know if this will save Elena's life," Bonnie admits. "All the witches said is that this spell would help her." Damon interjects again, gracing us with his telltale sarcasm.

"And of course the witchy powers that be couldn't have provided a better description of whatever witchy mojo they want you to practice." Damon summarizes bitterly.

"They didn't say," Bonnie confesses softly, feeling like a failure for not finding the perfect solution.

"Should we even be doing a spell if we don't know what it will do or what the supernatural consequences will be?" Current Elena raises the question with uncertainty ringing in her voice.

"We don't exactly have a choice," Damon points out forlornly. "I promised that I would accept whatever the witches told us, so we do this spell or Elena dies. It's that simple, so uncertain or not, this is happening," Damon declares unflinchingly. "Tell us what we need to do."

"I brought all the supplies we can do it inside." Bonnie suggests helpfully.

Bonnie sets up the candles, mixes the witchy ingredients and she starts chanting.

"I just need a drop of blood from each of you," Bonnie instructs calmly. She mixes all ingredients together as a puff of smoke emerges from the bowl, signaling the end of the spell. My head feels so much lighter and for a moment, the world goes darker and I lose consciousness. I can still hear voices in my diminished state, but I am not processing what they are saying.

"What did you do? The goal was to save Future Elena, not kill them both," Damon scolds Bonnie harshly.

"They're not dead," Bonnie reminds him. "It was an intense spell that even _I_ acknowledged we know nothing about. Their bodies are just exhausted from all the mystical energy flowing through them. They should wake in a moment."

The next thing I know, I feel like I am being lifted up and placed in a comfortable chair. A feeling of warmth and safety and love passes over me, and I know Damon is nearby. This is always how I feel when he carries me, shielding me from the world. In his arms, I feel safer than anywhere else. I open my eyes expecting to see Damon's blue eyes staring back at me, but instead all I see is Bonnie looking at me concerned.

"What's wrong?" Bonnie asks, worried by the confusion that is evident on my face.

"Damon's over there," I state simply, even though she has no idea why that makes absolutely no sense.

"Is now really the time to be fighting over me?" Damon asks angrily. He misinterpreted my statement as a judgment that he didn't run to me. "Bonnie was right next to you. There is no deeper meaning in which one of you I picked up," Damon claims aggravated that he has to explain himself.

"That wasn't what I meant," I state honestly. This catches Damon's attention, and his gaze is diverted back towards me.

"What are you talking about?" Damon questions unsure of what this is all about.

"I felt. I know I felt. This doesn't make any sense," I rant incomprehensibly to myself.

"You're officially babbling," Damon points out anxious. "Are you sure she didn't hit her head?" Damon checks with Bonnie, concerned for the state of my sound mind.

"I'm not crazy," I exclaim defiantly. "It must be an after effect of the spell. I need to test it. Elena you need to kiss Damon," I announce suddenly. Both their eyes shoot towards mine as if I have two heads.

"Are you insane?" Damon asks. "I know you feel bad about earlier, but this is not the way to make up for us almost kissing." Damon claims, once again misunderstanding me for the second time today.

"It has nothing to do with that," I promise truthfully. "After the spell, I was sure that I was in your arms. I felt it. There was a warmth, a sense of safety and rightness. It's how I feel when you're carrying me, but then I opened my eyes and you were with her. I need another strong emotional moment to see if this isn't just my imagination running wild," I explain reasonably.

"This sounds like a terrible idea," Elena chimes in skeptically. "There has to be another way to test your theory." I sit up and walk over towards my past self, taking her hand and catching her gaze.

"I know that you have no reason to, but do you trust me?" I question expectantly. She sighs and nods her head yes.

"Against all my better judgment, I do," Elena admits.

"Then I need you to do this," I reply, not really excited about this plan myself. "It has to be an intense emotional moment or else it might not work. You can't hold anything back. I need your best effort here," I tell Elena.

"We have officially crossed the line into creepy," Current Elena responds; only mildly joking.

"I think we passed that point a while ago," I add lightly.

"We can be adult about this," Elena claims. "It's just a kiss."

"Just a kiss," Damon repeats unsure.

Elena leans forward to capture Damon's lips. They are tentative at first, not wanting to make this more emotional than it needs to be, but once Damon's hand cups her face, she is lost in the kiss. For nearly a minute, I feel emotions rushing through me at hyper-speed. I feel as if I'm being touched all over, and I am struggling to breathe. I feel lust, I feel satisfaction, and I feel a hint of love behind the intense make out. When they finally break apart, we are all struggling to breathe again.

"Judging by the flush in your cheeks, I take it you felt that?" Damon notices observantly.

"All of it. I felt all of it," I confess overwhelmed by the emotions flowing through me. I find it hard to separate mine from hers anymore. Elena jumps back into the discussion and distracts me from my thoughts.

"Only one thing left to do," Elena states.

"What's that?" I question curiously.

"You have to kiss _her_ now." Elena tells Damon and I casually, like it was no big deal.

"What," Damon and I both screech at the same time.

"Isn't this what got me trouble in the first place?" Damon questions fairly.

"It's just an experiment," Elena points out. "We need to test both sides to see if I feel the same connection. I'll close my eyes if it makes you feel more comfortable."

She takes a seat on the couch and lies down with her eyes closed. This time, Damon closes the distance between us and he kisses me full force, eager to kiss me again after so long of telling him that we couldn't. After far too short a time, I pull back trying to remind myself that this is an experiment, and it was not done for enjoyment.

"Anything?" Damon asks Elena expectantly.

"Nothing, the connection only flows one way." Elena admits, sounding perplexed and an emotion that confuses me, sadness.

"What does this mean Bonnie?" I ask, hoping my best friend has some answers.

"I have no idea," Bonnie replies, dashing my hopes of understanding this confusing mess.


	30. Chapter 30

**This update is a little later than I intended, but I'm just happy that I broke through my Nyquil induced haze to finish this chapter at all. If any of it doesn't make sense, I blame it entirely on the cold medicine. I did do something different with this chapter. I am changing point of view halfway through, because I needed to show both to include everything I wanted in this chapter. I hope it isn't too confusing.**

**I wanted to give a special thank you to everyone who reviewed last chapter. That was the most amount of reviews that I have ever received for one chapter of this story, so thank you. I hope that you all enjoy.**

Current Elena's POV

I'm seventeen years old. My biggest problems should be who will ask me to the school dance or what Aunt Jenna will do if I'm late for curfew. Sadly when you're a supernatural doppelganger caught up in a twisted vampire love triangle, the rules of what should be pretty much go out the window. I thought it would get easier once I let Stefan go, but my future self made that impossible by creating a new triangle, between the two of us and Damon. I'm actually competing with myself for Damon's heart. How ridiculous is that?

To top it all off, my best friend just did a spell that was supposed to 'help' Future Elena, whatever that means. So without considering the consequences, we did the mysterious spell only to have my emotions linked to my future self. As if being a teenager isn't hard enough, I now have someone else who feels all that I am feeling. It's like my life isn't my own anymore. I'm sharing it with her. I might feel a little better if there was some reciprocity, but I can't feel any of her emotions. She doesn't have to share her life, but I have to share mine. What's worse is that we have no idea what this means. Basically this all really sucks.

Damon is the first one to break the silence, but his voice appears unsteady and unsure. Two words that I would never use to describe Damon Salvatore. "Maybe this is temporary, like a side effect," Damon suggests optimistically. "The connection might wear off. The witches said this was all to help Elena. Maybe this was just an unforeseen consequence."

"Or maybe this is exactly what was supposed to happen," I speculate dejectedly. "Maybe the spell saved you and linked us on purpose." My future self appears as lost as all of us and she keeps shaking her head, not able to process what's happening.

"Why? What possible reason could they have for doing this?" Future Elena questions confused.

"Maybe they just made one choice a lot easier," I explain miserably, quickly silencing the room. The moment of silence doesn't last when Damon dramatically leaps to his feet in defensive mode.

"No, Elena, I know where you're going with this, and you're wrong," Damon claims emphatically. "This doesn't change anything. It doesn't change how I feel about you, and it doesn't change what I want. I may have been confused before, but I'm not now. I want you, this version of you. I pick you." Damon's declaration of devotion places a strangle hold on my heart. It's everything that I wanted to hear since I walked in on them almost kissing, but I don't know if it's enough.

"I believe you," I confess, with my voice trembling with every word, "and I want you too, but I can't handle this." Damon's face drops in heartbreaking sadness. He pulls away both physically and emotionally. He no longer holds the same pleading gaze when he meets my eyes, only cool detachment. I turn towards my future self who is covered in shame and guilt, I almost pity her, almost.

"Elena, I know it isn't fair, and I know in your heart that you only wanted to help, but I can't stop blaming you for all of this," I confess unapologetically. "I tried to be a good sport. I tried to be supportive and understanding, but your presence here has caused me nothing but misery and pain. You placed doubts in Stefan's head that led him to breaking up with me. You pushed me to give Damon a chance, and I fell for him at your urging. The very next day after I make out with Damon, I see you almost kissing him. All of that I can accept, but the idea that my experiences aren't my own anymore. That I cannot take. I cannot bear the thought that I will never kiss or hug or have another significant moment with Damon again that you will not be a part of. There is no choice anymore. That spell decided it. I can't feel what you feel. You'll never have another moment's peace if you have to experience the feelings of loving him without really having him. It will torture you, and knowing that I can never truly have him to myself will torture me." I strive to make a graceful exit, dramatic, and with a little bit of flair, but Elena's arm catches mine in a tight grip and her voice begs softly.

"Wait, don't go," she pleads. "I never wanted any of this." I pull my arm away from her grasp and stare her dead in the eyes as I speak without a trace of sympathy.

"That's just it Elena, you did. In the deepest, darkest parts of your heart, you wanted to fail in pushing Damon and I together. You wanted to stay. You wanted a second chance to reclaim the life that you lost. Congratulations, you won." My future self has a few stray tears running down her face, and not even that is enough to earn her any comfort from me. She wants absolution, forgiveness, but I'm either too stubborn or too angry to grant it.

"I don't know how, but I will fix this," my future self promises with determination. I can't help but let out a heavy sigh.

"Haven't you learned anything from all of this?" I ask quietly. "Some things not even you can fix." I make my way up the stairs, but halfway there, I stop and turn around. "You know what the worst part of all of this is?" I rhetorically question my future self. "I was blissfully ignorant of my feelings for Damon before you came along and then you made me fall for him and I don't even get to keep him. Here I thought your life was tragic." I stomp up the stairs like a child and slam the door, then grab hold of my teddy bear and weep into my pillow.

Future Elena's POV

I failed. My mission in coming here was to make my past self's life better, and in that goal, I failed miserably. She's more unhappy than she was before I arrived. It's hard to steel myself against her verbal assault, and her words hurt more than I admit. I wonder how much of what she said was true. Did I really want to succeed if it meant losing Damon all over again? Wasn't there some small selfish part of me that wanted to not just fix her life, but maybe take it over?

No, I think to myself. I do not accept that. I do not accept that I am responsible for every stray selfish thought that invades my mind. I am not accountable for inner thoughts and feelings. It is only my actions that define me, and I chose time and time again to let Damon go. I might have had moments of weakness, but my resolve to see my past self together with Damon has never wavered. This isn't my fault. Soon enough, my past self will calm down and she'll realize that too.

Damon proposes that he go upstairs to talk to her, but my arm grabs his to stop him in his tracks. "I can feel her anger and her pain. I know you want to make this better, but trust me you can't help. She needs time." Damon's cool mask seems to shake just a bit.

"I can't just leave her alone," he replies. We're caught in a staring contest that no one seems likely to win, when Bonnie chimes in.

"I'll go," Bonnie proposes helpfully.

I watch her ascend up the stairs and Damon offers to drive me back to the boardinghouse. It's clear that I'm not wanted here, so I agree gratefully. Neither of us says a word on the drive home. The guilt is as palpable as the tension in the car. We both think our actions are to blame for hurting her, and neither of us wants to talk about it.

It isn't until Damon is about to walk upstairs that I finally find my voice again.

"Are we going to talk about this?" I question, cautiously, afraid of the consequences of opening this can of worms.

"There's nothing more to say," Damon claims with certainty. "It isn't your fault that the spell backfired. I don't blame you, and you shouldn't blame yourself. I just can't deal with any of this today," Damon responds tiredly. He turns his back to me, before I shout back at him.

"Why not?" I question him further, pushing my already failing luck today. "If you don't blame me, then why can't you look me in the eyes? Why can't you talk to me?" Damon spins around and locks his eyes with mine for the first time since we left the house, and he doesn't look angry or resentful like I thought, if anything he seems to be turning that anger on himself. That makes me feel worse than all the guilt that he could lay at my feet. Damon's voice brings me back to the harsh reality, and I wish that I was miles away.

"In all the scenarios that I imagined of this turning out, I never thought that I would break _her_ heart," Damon recounts in disbelief. "I always figured she would break mine, but it turns out you were right. She really does love me. She might not have come out and said it, but I saw it in her eyes. I just realized for the first time how right you were about everything. I was scared that she could never love me, so I clung to you, but I realized when she walked away that if I was given a choice; she's the one that I'd pick. She's the version that's right for me. The future changed you, maybe it changed both of us, and maybe that man who died was the one who was right for you, but I'm not him, he's gone. I don't say this to hurt you or because I don't love you, because I do. And as awful as it is, if given another chance, I would still do that spell. I would let her suffer to save your life, but if that wasn't the choice, if I could send you back to a better future, I would, because you were right, you don't belong here."

I stare at his retreating form, unable to speak or to move or to breathe. I can't even summon the urge to cry. The last place that I want to be is trapped in this house with Damon all night, but I realize hopelessly that I have no place else to go. My phone buzzes, signaling an incoming text. It's from Elijah. His sources tell him that Klaus is on the move and he plans to be in Mystic Falls by tomorrow. The moon will be full tomorrow night and Klaus must want to rush to complete the ritual, so he doesn't have to wait another month. I feel a little relieved at the thought that this will all be over soon. Klaus will be dead and nothing will be keeping me here any longer. I text Elijah back that I will speak to him tomorrow about finalizing the details and I start thinking about my life outside of Mystic Falls, because I can't stay here another second.

**Please don't hate me. I know that is an awful place to leave and you guys will likely be very angry at Current Elena, Damon or both, but have a little faith. If you do hate me for leaving it on such a cliffhanger, please leave an angry review to vent your frustration. :) **


	31. Chapter 31

**First off, I wanted to respond to a lot of people's comments about the last chapter. I know that some of the characters were acting childish. That was on purpose, and you were supposed to be mad at them for hurting Future Elena, but I hope to explain and make up for it with this chapter. This one is a lot lighter, and hopefully you guys like this one more than the last. That being said, I hope you all enjoy.**

Future Elena's POV

After another night of restless sleep thinking about Klaus' impending arrival, I wake up to the sweet smell of maple syrup and pancakes wafting up the stairs. I can't imagine who could be cooking, since I am the only human currently residing in the boardinghouse, but I quickly throw on some respectable clothes and rush downstairs to satisfy my curiosity. I stop abruptly in the kitchen when I see the chef is none of than Damon. My feet feel glued to the floor and my whole body frozen in place. Describing the tension as awkward would be putting it mildly after last night. It's hard to get past the person that you love telling you that they wish they could send you away.

I resolve not to be the one to break the silence. I may not be angry per say for what he said to me last night, but I certainly am not going to beg for him to talk to me either. I do still have some self-respect, and I've done enough groveling this past week to last me a lifetime. Luckily, Damon saves us both from another second of weird, uncomfortable silence. "I'm not good at apologies," Damon claims without further preamble. "I am good at pancakes," he remarks with a cocky smirk, "so I figured slaving over a hot stove might serve as a form of contrition for my behavior the other night."

"Damon, you don't have to . . ."

"Yes, I do," Damon interrupts resolutely. "I was upset, at you and at the other you, and I was just lashing out. I didn't mean any of it," Damon swears.

"Oh, you meant all of it," I reply sadly, my head hanging down low as the words come out. "Your anger just gave you an excuse to say what you were really thinking, but I accept your apology and your pancakes," I state with a half-smile that doesn't quite reach my eyes. "I know you would never do anything to hurt me on purpose," I tell him earnestly, thinking of all the times Damon swooped in to protect me from harm. Damon smiles back at me warmly, but there is a tiny crack in his happy façade.

"Why do you have to be so understanding about all this?" Damon questions me half-jokingly. "Couldn't you at least throw some hot syrup in my face, pout, or yell, something to make me feel less crappy about myself?"

"There's really no need," I promise him as I reach for his hand to squeeze it reassuringly. "I've hurt you plenty of times, and I never showed up with a warmed up glass of blood as an apology, so I'd say we're even. Maybe last night was just my bad karma finally coming back to bite me." All the mistakes still haunt me. The events of the future seem to be the only things that I can't stop apologizing for, and the universe won't let me stop paying for them.

"That's a load of crap," Damon disagrees unexpectedly. "I'd say after all that you've suffered the karma scales are probably tipping in your favor. Last night was just me being an ass." I can't help, but break out in a wide smile at his rather spirited defense of my honor.

"Why don't we just agree to disagree, and I can eat these delicious smelling pancakes?" I offer sweetly, while sticking a big mouthful into my mouth.

"Deal," Damon agrees happily.

We eat in a comfortable silence as I devour my food. He simply watches me, while sipping his liquid breakfast and enjoying my expressions of approval at his cooking. After the last bite is gone, I gather up my things and prepare to leave.

"Where are you headed so early?" Damon inquires curiously. I still haven't told him about Klaus' impending visit, and I am trying to avoid it. If he feels I am in any danger, he will risk life and limb to keep me safe. I already watched him die once at Klaus' hands, and I have no desire to do it again, so I only disclose the first stop on my day's schedule.

"I'm headed over to my house to knock some sense into the younger, less intelligent version of myself," I reply with hint of sarcasm.

"Are you sure that is such a good idea after yesterday?" Damon questions skeptically.

"Absolutely, I wasn't afraid to piss her off before. I'm not starting now," I answer confidently, while swinging my bag over my shoulder.

"Best of luck," Damon offers sincerely, before breaking out his patented sarcasm. "Avoid sharp objects, don't get within shanking distance, and try to resist the impulse to yell when cornered."

"Thank you, I think. The apology pancakes were to die for," I compliment politely, and I'm almost out the door before I turn around to say one more thing. "Do me a favor and stay inside today," I request. "The other me still seems pretty pissed, and I don't want you to get into any more trouble." My lie seems believable enough, and I hope he doesn't push the issue any further. Damon doesn't need to get caught up in all of this.

"I'll do my best," Damon answers to my relief. I smile and wave goodbye.

Once I arrive at my house, I use the spare key to avoid the very real possibility of my past self answering and slamming the door in my face. I quietly walk up the stairs and walk into my room without invitation, and I see my past self sprawled out on the bed, writing furiously in her journal. She barely glances up before turning her eyes back to the pages and speaking coldly to me.

"If you're here to apologize, please just save it," my past self responds with an angry bite in her voice.

"Oh, I have no intention of apologizing," I respond, correcting her faulty assumption. "Last night I was all sad and remorseful, because you pushed just the right buttons to tap into my constant need to blame myself. I've had time to think about it, and I'm not sorry," I reply unapologetically. Elena's face contorts in shock and rage at my lack of guilt.

"Why are you here?" She demands, with increasing fury.

"I'm here to talk you about being a little crybaby bitch yesterday," I answer unabashedly. My past self just stares incredulously at my direction.

"Little harsh don't you think?" She asks, offended by my slight.

"From experience, I know we can be a little thick headed. I needed something extreme to get your attention."

"So you're just here to insult me?" She questions in an increasingly hostile voice, and I take a tiny step back, remembering what Damon said about shanking distance.

"No," I reply genuinely, losing the sarcasm in hopes of connecting to her once more. "I'm here to find out what you are so afraid of."

"I'm not afraid of anything," She responds defensively within seconds. Her answer was instantaneous, like it was a reflex or an automated response, and I'm not sure if even she believed her own words.

"Yes you are," I counter brilliantly, "and I know because I was scared all the time too. I was scared of feeling too much, losing too much, and along the way, I still lost the only things that ever mattered. I used my fear to push Damon away, just like you are. Watching the man you love die in front of your eyes helps clarify a lot of things. All the insecurities and fears didn't mean a damn once he was gone. Don't wait till it's too late to fight for him. You're using this spell as an excuse, the same way that you've been using me as an excuse for not being with him. I need to know what could be so scary that would make you walk away." After a moment of silence, where my past self studies me questioningly, I see her barriers break down once more.

"I gave my heart away without thinking once," she confesses truthfully. "I did it because I was lost and alone and I needed something to cling to. Stefan crushed it, and not just my heart, but my idealism, my innocence. I never thought that someone who truly loved me could hurt me like that. I already feel more for Damon just based on the past week than I ever did for Stefan, and that is terrifying. Maybe I'm just afraid that if I give my heart to Damon that he'll use it to destroy me."

A mountain of differences that separate us, and for the first time, I see myself in her. We're not so different. We fear the same things, loss, loneliness, and hurting the people that we love. I feel more connected to her than I ever have to anyone. I don't know if it is the effect of the spell, but I feel as if we are one person in this room together, and it brings me great peace. I grab her hand and take it in my own as I have done many times, since I've come back and I speak to her, trying to push away her doubts just with the sound of my voice.

"That's what an all-consuming love is," I explain wishfully. "It's giving your entire heart to another person and trusting that that they will guard it and keep it safe. Trust me; no one is a better protector of our heart than Damon. When Stefan left town in my future, Damon vowed to bring him home, not just because they were brothers, but because he thought it would make me happy. He was prepared to give his life to save Stefan because he wanted to give me whatever I wanted, even if it cost him everything he ever wanted. He protected me from the truth of Stefan's atrocities, of Stefan's victims. And every night when Stefan was gone, he would call me or stop over just to be sure that I would make it through another day. Damon kept me from crumbling. He made me strong, and he's the reason that I made it this far."

I recount all of Damon's great moments of heroism and strength, and I wonder how it ever could have taken me so long to tell him how I felt. I must have been deaf, dumb, and blind not to see it, especially when everyone else did. Luckily my past self has the benefit of my vast experiences, and she was learning, slowly but surely. Her voice broke me from my nostalgic musings.

"I'm sorry," she apologizes sincerely.

"Don't sweat it," I answer casually. "I'm already over our little spat the other day."

"No, not about that," she responds to my surprise. "I'm sorry that you lost the man who did all those things for you, because as close as my Damon is to that man, he's still not the same. You two don't have those same shared experiences, and I'm sorry that you can never get those back." I smile gratefully at her sentiment, but the expression is far too weak to last long on my face. I'm determined not to cry, break down, or let Elena feel sorry for me, so I put on a brave front.

"Being around your Damon helps," I admit truthfully. "At least I know he can finally have the future that he was meant for. I just wish that I could be there to see it," I answer regretfully, thinking how hard it will be to leave them all behind.

"You can," my past self replies instantaneously. "I know I overreacted, but if you want to stay, you can," she urges me pleadingly. I love her for saying it, but that would only complicate her life further, and I vowed not to be selfish.

"We both need to live our own lives again," I remind her sadly, "and we can't do that together, so I'm going to leave once things are settled here."

"Where?" She asks thoughtfully, clearly concerned for my future.

"There is an old friend that I hope won't mind the company, his name is Elijah, and I figure we could both use somebody."

"Are you sure that you'll be okay?" She double checks, uncertain how hard she should be fighting to keep me close.

"I'll be fine," I reassure her one last time. "That spell really did help me, because now at least I know that I'll have your positive blissful loving feelings to keep me warm and content at night."

She grabs me into a fierce embrace and I quickly relax into it. "Thank you for everything," she murmurs in my ear.

"You're welcome," I reply thankful that we can end on good terms. "So now that we've settled our differences, why don't you go apologize and tell the boy that you love how you feel," I not so subtlety advise.

"I still need some time to wrap her head around all of this," she confesses, "but I promise I will soon."

That's enough for me, so I don't push it further. The doorbell rings and I offer to answer it, since she is still wrapped up in covers. When I get to the door, no one is there. Only a note is left on the mat, and it has my name on it. I rip it open to find a tiny note inside.

_Odd time of year for a family vacation, luckily, I intercepted your nearest and dearest on their way out of town yesterday. If you ever wish to see them again, you will meet me at the clearing by the falls at 8 o'clock. At 8:01, I will start slaughtering your loved ones every five minutes until you show or until you have no one left, whichever comes first. Arrive alone and tell no one._

_Klaus_

Fear grips me tighter than it has since I arrived back in town. They were supposed to be safe, but once again, my loved ones were at Klaus' mercy. I needed help. This story had to have a happier ending. It just had to, so I dialed the only person who I knew had enough strength to bring my family home. "Hello, Elijah," I answer in a panicky voice. "There's been a complication, and I need you."

**As Always Please Read and Review**

**P.S. if you have time, check out ****xJessxxLovex****'s story called **_**I Won't Give Up. **_**It is short, but cute, and I think we all need a little bit of cute after the finale. **


	32. Chapter 32

**Hi guys. I just wanted to thank everyone who has been so awesome throughout this story. All of you who have reviewed, whether you do it regularly or every once and awhile, it is always appreciated. This chapter is a little shorter than they have been, but it is a lead up to the big showdown that has been 32 chapters in the making. I hope you all enjoy.**

Future Elena's POV

Following a brief rundown of the life threatening peril that my loved ones are in, Elijah agrees to meet me in half an hour at the old witch house. I walk back into the house and try to come up with a believable lie to keep my past self from worrying. When I reenter our room, Elena smiles back at me, oblivious to the fact that almost everyone she loves is at the mercy of a psychopath. "Who was at the door?" Elena asks me innocently.

"It was no one, just kids playing ding dong ditch," I lie convincingly.

"If it was just a prank, why were you downstairs so long?" Elena questions me inquisitively. Her eyebrow arches in confusion, but her expression isn't one of mistrust, only mild curiosity.

"I called Bonnie to see if she wanted to hang out," I reply, thinking quickly on my feet. This lie explains my absence and gives me an excuse to flee, two birds one stone. "I am headed over there now, so I should probably go and leave you to your thoughts."

She accepts my account and doesn't question me further. Before departing in a hurry, a sudden fear fills me of what happens to my past self if she leaves the safety of our home, especially if Klaus or one of his minions spots her. "You should probably stay in tonight," I suggest out of the blue. "All the drama is taking its toll on you, and I think you need a night of relaxation. Maybe you should invite Damon over. You can clear the air and watch a movie," I advise with a smile, hoping that she's buying it.

"Still brave enough to play the matchmaker," Elena teases lightly, signaling her acceptance of my proposal. Just as I think that I've gotten off scot free, she tilts her head to the side and studies my face. "Are you sure you're okay?" My past self asks, concerned at my overly serious demeanor.

"Of course," I respond automatically, almost too quickly to be convincing. She stares back suspiciously, but doesn't press me further. I manage to escape without further incident and I make my way to the old witch house. On the drive over, all I can think about are the all the ways that this can go wrong. Almost all the people in Klaus' grasp died once because of me. I can't bear the thought of history repeating itself, or that all my efforts this week have been in vain. They have to live. No matter what, _they_ have to live, or all of this was for nothing.

By the time that I've run through every nightmare scenario in my head, I've arrived at the old witch house, and I spot Elijah looking poised as ever calmly waiting for me. "I understand our plan has run into a few unforeseen obstacles," Elijah states, with a surprising hint of concern breaking through his usual unshakable temperament. His words hold no trace of emotion, but the pity that I see in his eyes, reminds me of what a good friend he was to me once. Even in a time when he barely knows me, he cares about my wellbeing almost instantly. I wonder what I ever could have done to inspire such devotion.

I don't allow myself to dwell on that for too long, and once the warm and fuzzy feelings pass, I remember why I'm here and jump back into proactive mode. "They're in danger, Elijah. We need to get them out," I demand frantically. Elijah's face betrays his true unease at my distress, but he speaks in a reassuring voice that only adds to the commanding presence that is Elijah.

"You have my word that I will aid you in rescuing them once Klaus is dead," Elijah promises sincerely.

"No," I shout back like a child. "It has to be before then. What's to stop whoever's guarding them from killing them all once Klaus is dead?" Elijah is good enough to overlook my mild temper tantrum, and my assumption that I can order around a 1000 year old original.

"I can't protect you and protect your friends at the same time," Elijah reminds me. "You're walking into a trap where you're the bait." I'm touched by his fears for my safety, but losing _my_ life isn't what I'm most afraid of, losing any of theirs terrifies me.

"I don't need protection," I assure him, trying to keep a straight face as I'm saying it. "Dr. Martin will be hiding in wait when I hand myself over to Klaus. He will do the spell and Klaus will be dead. In the meantime, you will be rescuing my friends. If you want me to walk into the lion's den, we do it on my terms," I proclaim resolutely.

Elijah appears deeply troubled by my ultimatum, and before I know it, he starts talking swiftly in what sounds like multiple languages. I recognize some, but others are completely foreign to me. I realize he must have picked up a number of dialects over the centuries. After a thousand years, he's probably qualified to work for the United Nations as a translator by now. While I can't understand any of his words, it doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure out that he is probably cursing my name in all the modern languages and some of the classic ones. I can't help but laugh at little at Elijah flying off the handle, because he is always so cool and composed. Ten minutes with me, and he's cursing my name in every language known to man. When he starts speaking in English again, I try to suppress the goofy grin that appears, despite our dire circumstances. Elijah's voice reaches a level that I have never heard before, and I know he is growing increasingly annoyed at my willfulness.

"You are the most frustrating, stubborn woman that I have ever met, and I'm immortal," Elijah claims with an annoyed sigh.

"I get that a lot," I reply with a playful smirk. Elijah cannot help but crack the tiniest smile at my joke, but I can see how much he's fighting against it. His annoyance and anger melts away with that smile and his composure is firmly back in place where it belongs.

"Am I to assume that you will not be changing your mind about this?" Elijah questions calmly.

"I'm afraid not," I reply with a twinge of regret.

"Well it seems I have no choice," Elijah concedes, though clearly he's not happy about it.

"I trust you Elijah," I state, without reservations. "I know you're a man of honor, but I need to hear you say it. I need you to promise that you'll put their lives before mine." Elijah appears conflicted; because he knows once he swears to it, he is bound by his pledge of honor.

"I have grown rather fond of you in our brief meetings," Elijah confesses uneasily. "I don't relish the thought of sending you to my brother without my aid, but I know better than most about the desire to save one's family. I will defend yours as if they were my own. If this is what you truly want, you have my word. Their lives will be spared."

I'm overcome with gratitude at Elijah's promise to me, and I abruptly wrap my arms around him in an impromptu hug. Elijah is stiff at first, still not used to my sudden affection, but he relaxes after a moment and hugs me back to my surprise. I take this moment to slip a letter in the original's pocket that I had written before I drove over. It has the location of the storage facility where Future Stefan told me Klaus kept his family, and a plea to tag along in whatever world adventures Elijah has planned after Klaus is dead. I know how dangerous it is what I'm doing, so if I make it out of this, Elijah will know to meet me up with me later, and if I don't, he will still be reunited with his siblings. I take my leave after I pull away from the hug and I walk silently back to my car.

As I'm sitting in the driver's seat, I pull out a piece of paper and a pen to start another letter. This confrontation with Klaus is life and death, no matter what assurances I might have given Elijah. There are some things that I need Damon to know if this is in fact my last day, but I know telling him directly will only arouse his suspicions, so I put all of it down on paper. I pour out everything I feel and everything I wish for him. I seal the letter in an envelope and I drive over to drop it off in the boardinghouse's mailbox. I take one last look at the house, resisting the urge to go inside and see Damon before I go.

It only takes minutes for me to make the short drive to the clearing by the falls. The source of my worst nightmares is standing smugly in the center. "Hello, darling, how good of you to join me," Klaus states with an arrogant smirk that looks vile on his face. His confidence never wavers until the moment that I see him double over in pain on the ground. He is writhing in agony, and I have never felt so powerful. Even though it isn't me directly taking him down, I relish the thought of being responsible for his demise. He took everything from me, and as I grab the nearest large wooden stick I can find, I realize it is time for Klaus to feel what it is like to be tortured, to feel what my brother felt, true suffering.

**As Always Please Read and Review**


	33. Chapter 33

**Getting this chapter written was like pulling my own teeth. It is partly because of my difficulty lately in finishing this story, and partly because I've got another story idea competing for my attention that I desperately want to write. I promised myself that I would finish this first, but I can't get this other story out of my head, so that is the reason for the delay. We are so close to the end of this story, but there are still a few more chapters before it is over. I hope you all enjoy.**

Future Elena's POV

As I stare down at the vampire who single handedly ruined my life, and I am struck with a strong need for vengeance, an eye for an eye. So I grip the wooden stick that I am holding with both hands and tauntingly swing it closer and closer to Klaus' body as I verbally harass him. "How rude of me," I state with feigned remorse. "We haven't been formally introduced in this time. I'm Elena Gilbert," I state with a piercing stare, "and my face is gonna be the last thing that you see before you die." I swear with a deadened look in my eyes. Klaus struggles to get back on his feet, but the spell is taking its toll and he is too weak to run or fight. "Oh, don't try and get up," I advise with a smile, "believe me it won't help. See my friend behind you is doing some major witchy mojo. Can't say as if I entirely understand it, but I do know that with each passing moment, he is draining the life out of you. I would relish these next couple minutes, because they will be the last of your wretched miserable life." Klaus simply stares back at me as his entire body is practically convulsing from the pain. His words barely make it past his lips, and they require great effort to be spoken.

"A lot of hatred for someone who doesn't know me love," Klaus states with his typical arrogance, present even in his death. I wonder if he'll be so smug once the blood stops flowing through his veins and his body turns grey and lifeless. Klaus doesn't hold any power over me anymore, and it's time that he realizes that. He's nothing anymore, and he's at my mercy now.

"On the contrary," I contradict with a false sense of levity, "I know all about you, poor sad orphan wasting all of eternity searching for someone to love him, all the while alienating the only people who ever did. If you weren't such a vile, vindictive bastard, I might actually feel sorry for you. Granted not sorry enough to avoid torturing you in these last precious seconds, but just enough to appreciate the dramatic irony that your own brother hates you so much, he concocted this entire plan just to kill you. Shame he can't be here to truly appreciate the moment. I guess I'll just have to enjoy it for us both. We really should be getting on with the torture, because there is a rather pressing time constraint. So let me tell you how this is going to work, I am going to stab you repeatedly with this sharp, pointy stick, one hard poke for every life that you stole from me," I explain coolly, as I step closer with my weapon.

I jab him as hard as I can muster in the stomach, and I find the scream of pain particularly satisfying. "This is for Isobel," I yell at Klaus as the wood enters his body. "She might have been the worst maternal role model since Mommie Dearest, but given enough time, she could have changed, found her humanity again, but you compelled her to kill herself before she got the chance." I remove the stick and immediately bring it down in a new spot just under his rib cage.

"This is for John," I respond with bitter hatred. "Again, not exactly winning any awards for parent of the year, but he tried, for me, he tried to be a better man, a better father. He was forced to give his life to save mine during your precious sacrifice." John might not have died directly at Klaus' hands, but he was certainly responsible. Once more I remove the stick from Klaus' chest only to reinsert it in a new location on his body. Another yelp of pain brings a smile to my face, as I move on to more of Klaus' victims.

"This is for Jenna," I state as I drive the stick further into his chest. "She just wanted to save me, protect me, and you sacrificed her in front of my eyes. You drove a stake through her heart, you son of a bitch." This time, after I pull the stick out, I tie a bit of vervain, which I had taken from Alaric, to the end of my improvised weapon, before driving it deep into his chest.

"This is for Bonnie," I spit out in a fury. "She was loyal and strong and all she wanted was to protect me and protect this town from people like you. My only regret is that she can't be here to watch you die." I repeat the stabbing motion with gusto, earning another grunt of pure agony.

"This is for Alaric," I declare with malice in my heart. "He stayed with me, kept me safe, and acted as my guardian after you had taken away everyone else. You murdered him because he knew me, because he loved me, and because you had something to prove. Alaric Saltzman is a hundred times the man that you will ever be, that's why your father never loved you, because you weren't good enough, and you never will be." I see a flicker of anger and hatred. I've finally struck a nerve, and I delight in the feeling of control over this man who spent so long controlling me and everyone that I love. The stick once again finds its way to a new home in Klaus' body as I continue my assault.

"This is for Matt," I proclaim, while making an extra twisting motion with the stick. "He was the only person in my life who entered into this supernatural world by choice. He wasn't a werewolf or a vampire, and he didn't see ghosts. But he chose to fight at my side, because he was a truer friend than anyone could ever hope to deserve, and you were the one who took him away." Klaus no longer fights against the pain, either because he knows he can't win or because he's simply lost the will to live, either way, it serves as a positive sign. I feel better after I once more drive the weapon into his chest as retribution for another fallen friend.

"This is for Tyler," I state with a grim expression, as the weapon disappears into his body. "He was bound to you by a sire bond, forced into false loyalty, but more than that, he was a decent and honorable man who fought against his worst instincts for the girl that he loved. I was forced to watch her mourn for him after you ordered him to rip his own heart from his chest, so I think one more stab for good measure for what you did to Caroline." I bring the stick out and stab him twice, once for Caroline and once for Jeremy.

"This is for my little brother," I declare with a deeper hatred than I had ever experienced. "He was sixteen years old. He was entitled to a life, but you stole that from him, just like you stole everything else. Every life you touch is the worse for it. You are a poison, a disease on this Earth, and there isn't a single person alive whose life won't be better once you're gone." Even as I make another stabbing motion, I don't feel quite the level of relief that I expected at Klaus' suffering, because I knew it would never be enough.

"No amount of pain will ever make up for what you took from me," I admit, still caught up in my righteous hatred. "I had someone who loved me, who would have fought for me, killed for me, died for me, and I watched his life slip away in an instant because of you, so I hope this one really hurts," I declare wishfully, as I make several effective wounds in the body of my former tormentor. After I tire myself out with stabbing, I stand hovering over his body, continuing to mock him as he dies helplessly on the ground like the animal that he is.

"The man that I loved died at your hands," I state, trying to keep from crying at the memory. "It only seems fitting that you should die at mine. May you rot in Hell, knowing that no one ever loved you like I was loved. 1000 years on this Earth and you still missed out on the only experience worth having, loving someone and being loved by them. You're going to die sad and alone, no friends to save you, no family left to mourn for you, no one to give a damn. This is a far sweeter justice than mere death."

I pull the stick from Klaus' chest, fully intending to take another whack at inflicting as much physical pain as possible until Klaus' body gives out. The stick just hangs in my hand poised to strike, when I hear a familiar voice in the distance.

"Elena," someone calls out to me, diverting my attention for just a second, as I stare in puzzlement at what my past self is doing here. In that moment, Klaus seizes his opportunity, and uses his last bit of strength to wrench the stick from my grasp. I feel the sharp pain in my left side as I look down and see my weapon stuck within my own chest. I fall to the ground just a couple feet from Klaus' body. I'm not sure whether the adrenaline is pumping through my body, or if I am simply in a state of shock, but I can't feel the pain anymore. I can't feel anything, but I am struggling for every breath, as I see my past self rush to my side.

"What are you doing here?" I choke out, before blood rises in my throat and trickles out my mouth.

"I called Bonnie," my past self explains, "and she said she wasn't with you, so I had her do a tracking spell. This is my fault," Elena claims as the guilt threatens to consume her. "I shouldn't have come, or I should have brought Damon. I still can," she states hopefully. "Damon will come, and you'll be fine. You'll be okay," she promises confidently, needing to believe that I'll survive this.

"No, I won't be," I tell her regretfully. "Damon is miles away, and even racing here, he would still be too late. I'm dying." Another round of hacking, bloody coughs all but confirms my self-diagnosis.

"No, you are not dying," my past self claims firmly. "You can't be dying, because we went through all this time, energy, and effort to save you. You can't just die because I screwed up," she states with tears staining her face. I summon whatever strength I have left to pass on my final thoughts to her.

"This isn't your fault," I promise her, not really expecting her to believe me. "I chose to faceoff with Klaus alone, and I chose not to tell you where I was going. I don't have much time left so let's not waste any more of it blaming yourself. I need you to listen to me, just once more." She nods her head and takes hold of my hand as I struggle to speak. "Don't make my mistakes," I manage to breathe out in a whisper. "Tell Damon that you love him every day for the rest of your lives together. Make him believe that he's worthy of love again, and never take him for granted. He is and will always be the love of my life. You be sure to tell him that," I request pleadingly, as my own tears travel down my face.

"I will," she swears, nearing the edge of a breakdown. "I promise I will." She takes a second to organize her thoughts, clearly having more to say, but I can feel that I am running out of time. I'm grateful once she finds her voice again, because I feel my body shutting down. "I need you to know," Elena tells me in sorrowful whisper. "I need to tell you that if I could save you, I would gladly share my life with you. Every emotion, every feeling, every second, I would share, if I could just keep you, if I could just save you." I smile feebly back at her for the sweetness of her gesture, and I squeeze her hand lightly.

"Don't worry," I order her weakly. "It's okay. I think it's all going to be okay."

"How?" Elena asks hopelessly. "You came here to get a second chance, and you die anyway. How is that ever going to be okay?" Her voice breaks under the weight of the emotion and the unfairness of the situation. My vision gets dimmer and I can feel the blood pooling underneath me, but I use whatever strength is left in me to do what I traveled through time to do, help her.

"Because _you_ were my second chance," I admit. "_You_ were my redemption. So please, don't waste your life hiding your heart from the people who matter most. Love as much as you can for as long as you can. All your heart, give him all your heart," I mumble as the darkness finally overtakes me. Just before I close my eyes, I swear I hear Damon's voice calling out to me, but I can't hold on any longer, and I slip away.

When I open my eyes again, there is a near blinding light that seems to come from everywhere and nowhere. There is nothing around but vast emptiness wherever I look, except for a familiar face gazing back at me with a smile.

"Miss Sheila," I speak in disbelief, unsure as to what is happening.

"Hello, child," she addresses me, like she did when I was little and playing over at her house. "We have much to talk about and important decisions to make, so we better get started."

**Please don't hate me. From practically the start of this story, I knew what this scene would look like. Everything I did in the story was leading up to this moment where Future Elena would die. I know that this isn't what a lot of you wanted for her, but I do still have a plan for her, as is evident by the end part of this chapter. I really, really want to know what you guys think, and whatever predictions you all have. Your reviews are what keep me writing. There are probably about ten people whose wonderful support is the only reason that this story ever got this far. So as always please read and review.**


	34. Chapter 34

**This chapter really took longer for me to write then I thought, but it is finally done. There are only two chapters left, can you believe it? I really never thought I would finish this story, but it's almost over, and I just want to thank again everyone who has reviewed this story. It means so much, and it makes me update way faster. I hope you all enjoy.**

Damon's POV

Hours have passed since Elena left to have her little come to Jesus moment with her past self, and I am sort of freaking out. No, those are not the right words. I am 170 years old, a man, and a vampire. I do not freak out like some pathetic teenage girl waiting for a call or text. After the 47th time that I've checked my phone, I realize I might have been mistaken, and am in fact a pathetic teenage girl. I take another large gulp of my alcohol to distract myself, but nothing helps quiet the rampant thoughts running through my head.

When I have exhausted the majority of my liquor supply and flipped through a number of my favorite books, I abandon all hopes of a pleasant distraction. Luckily, I hear the sound of our mailman in the distance. Walking very slowly to the mailbox and back should take up at least two, three minutes of my time.

I shuffle through the typical junk mail, throwing it over my shoulder, until I come to a letter without an address, only my name written clearly on the front. Recognizing the handwriting immediately, I rip it open, dreading what its contents might hold.

_Dear Damon,_

_ By the time that you read this, I likely will already be gone. If all goes well, Klaus will be dead, and I'll be halfway out of town, in the company of a true and loyal friend, before you ever think to miss me. But seeing as how this is Mystic Falls, I need to accept that things might not go so well. _

_Right now I'm heading towards the clearing by the falls to meet Klaus and to kill him once and for all. Before you start cursing me for my stupidity, please try and understand. I couldn't tell you. If I had, you would have followed me there and put your life at risk to protect mine. I already watched you die once. I won't let history repeat itself. _

_I'm writing a new ending to this story, a new ending for you and for Elena and for all the other people in my life who have been plagued by the supernatural for too long. This all began with me, and it needs to end that way. _

_I'm not naïve enough to believe that anything I say will ever convince you that facing Klaus on my own is a good idea, but you of all people should understand. If it were up to you, I'm sure you wouldn't have even let me out of the house. You would have put your foot down, dug your heels in, and you would have completely disregarded what I wanted to keep me safe. I know all this, because in your shoes I would do the exact same thing. _

_It's who we are. Respecting choices is for other people, but not you and me. We're protectors, warriors. We save the people that we love without hesitation or thought of consequences. It's what I did when I asked you to compel Jeremy, and it's what you do whenever you feel my life is in danger. The entire time that we've known each other, you've never failed to protect me. It's time I finally protected you. _

_If you're mad at me, if you think that I'm a coward for putting this all in a letter, I don't blame you. My only excuse is that I've had too many heart wrenching goodbyes over the past couple of days, and I don't know how to say goodbye to you, I won't. I refuse. _

_While I can't close the book on us completely, I can't stay here anymore either. You were right the other night when you said that I didn't belong here. This isn't my home anymore, so I need to find a new place to belong, a new home. _

_But before I leave, I need you to know that I loved you more than I ever thought possible. You taught me what it meant to trust in love again, to trust that I was good enough to fight for. After Stefan, I couldn't help feeling like I wasn't enough. Like if I were better, maybe Stefan would have fought for me or chosen me, above his need for revenge or his avoidance of his guilt. Every single day, you proved that you would always choose me, above all others, in all circumstances, you chose me. I'm just sorry that it took so long for me to finally choose you. I promise you from this day forward until the day I die, no matter how far I go, my heart will always be here with you. It will always be yours. All my heart, forever and always._

_ Love,_

_Elena_

My heart beats strongly in my chest as I read about Elena's undying devotion, but it only takes a second for me to jump into protective mode. We all have our roles to play. Elena's job is to be annoyingly self-sacrificing, and it is my job to save her from her stupid decisions. It's like our thing. With that in mind, I take off towards the clearing by the falls. My vampire speed gets me there quickly, only a few minutes, much faster than traveling by car. I stop a few feet from where the action is taking place. It takes me a second to assess the situation and identify all the key players, and once I do my heart drops to my stomach. Some man, who I assume is Klaus, is shrieking in pain on the ground, and lying a few feet away is Elena, my sweet Elena, with a stick jammed in her side, and her past self standing helplessly beside her. I call out to her, not even knowing what this will achieve.

Before either Elena can sense my presence, I am standing in front of them biting into my wrist and shoving it in Future Elena's face, begging her to drink, to live. She makes no moves to swallow, in fact she doesn't move at all. She's still and lifeless. Current Elena is sobbing behind me, and she places her hand on my back saying how sorry she is. I gently shrug it off, because she can't comfort me. If she does, it means Elena is truly gone, and I can't accept that. I pull out the stick that is maiming her otherwise perfect body, and I hold her in my arms, tears cascading down my face, pleading with her. "Please wake up," I beg. My eyes never leave hers, because looking away would mean giving up on her, and I'm not prepared to do that just yet. I keep whispering to her, even though I know she can't hear me any longer. "I was supposed to protect you. I was supposed to save you. It isn't supposed to end like this. We're supposed to be survivors."

One really loud yelp breaks through my grief and for the first time since I arrived, I divert my attention back to Klaus. The man standing behind him chanting is clearly a witch, and simple deduction tells me he is responsible for causing the ancient vampire so much pain, and for that I am grateful. Without needing any explanations, I can piece together parts of what happened tonight. All that I need to know is that Klaus killed Elena. He took her away forever, and now I want my pound of flesh. I want my vengeance, so with a fiery fury, I reach into his chest and pull out his heart myself. He turns gray with veins appearing all over his body, and then he bursts into flames. The spell must have weakened him considerably, because even in my anguish addled brain, I know this shouldn't have worked. Killing an original shouldn't have been this easy, but the spell must have been in its final stages, and my thought is confirmed when I see the mysterious witch drop dead to his feet.

Klaus is finally dead, and it doesn't matter. I feel nothing but pain, and it only gets worse when I hear Current Elena gasp behind me. I rush to her side, looking everywhere for possible injuries. When I see none, I stare at her puzzled as she points to the ground below her. All I see is empty space; Future Elena's body is gone. "She just faded away," Elena mumbles incoherently under her breath.

There's nothing left, not even a body to bury. I drop to my knees and break down. There is no point in denying it any longer. Future Elena is dead and gone, and nothing will ever bring her back. This time when Current Elena wraps her arms around me, I accept the gesture, because it is the only thing reminding me that Elena isn't entirely lost to me. I didn't lose them both, so I weep for what was lost today, and for what was saved. We're both crying hopelessly, and I can't tell anymore if she is comforting me, or if I am comforting her, but at the moment, neither of us have the strength to care.

Only a few moments pass, when another mysterious stranger in a suit finds us in the field. His expression is one of true horror and sorrow. He knows the suffering that happened here today, just by staring at our faces. "You're Elijah," I guess correctly. My voice sounds hollow, and empty, just like I feel. He nods his head, confirming my suspicions. In a flash, I'm grabbing him by the throat trying to squeeze as hard as I can. "You were supposed to protect her. Where the Hell were you as she lay here dying?" Elijah doesn't try to shove me off or fight back. He doesn't even act as if my attempts are hurting him, which they might not be, given how old he is.

I only release my grip when I hear him speak, because he sounds just as lost as I do. "I never thought she was in any real danger," Elijah states guiltily, not even looking me in the eyes. "If I had, I never would have left her alone," he swears regretfully. "She was an extraordinary young woman," he states, far off in his mind. "She was one of the best that I've met in my long life, and I'm sorry that she's gone. Nothing can ever undo my mistake in leaving her, but I hope you will let me try to do better with the Elena that's still here."

My rage and fury bubbles over and I grip his suit in a threatening gesture, which he seems to mostly ignore. "Why in the Hell should I trust you when you already failed her once?"

Elijah stares back sympathetically, and I can feel his pity emanating off him in waves. A calm, but sorrowful demeanor replaces his look of shock and horror that has been in place since he arrived. "You should trust me, because I want to keep her safe, and so do you. I will keep every supernatural creature away from this town for the rest of her lifetime. You have my word," Elijah promises genuinely.

I could never truly forgive someone who failed Elena so spectacularly, but I won't turn down a chance to keep her safe from further harm. "You want to assuage your guilt, fine," I reply with a tone of bitterness and loathing. "Just know that if anything happens to her, even if it's not your fault, I will hold you personally responsible. I will hunt you down and kill you myself," I swear menacingly.

"I expect nothing less," Elijah remarks, mildly impressed by my boldness. He takes his leave, but not before retrieving the remains of his witch.

Klaus' body was dust and Elena and I were all alone again, but not for long. In the clearing, I see my brother standing at a distance, hesitant to step forward. I have no idea what he is doing here, or where everyone else is, but neither of us appears to be in a sharing mood. After a moment of consideration, he walks towards me with an unreadable expression. He takes in my appearance, the tear stains on my face and the blood on my shirt. We don't need words to tell each other what happened. To my surprise, he actually looks sorry. Despite his feigned indifference about Future Elena's fate, he truly cared that she was gone. Stefan mourned her like I did. He felt guilty like I did, maybe even more so, since it was his foolish choices that started all of this.

After all the fights and the bad feelings over the past week, I don't know what to expect from him anymore, and that's why he shocks me to my core when he embraces me in a crushing hug. "I'm so, deeply sorry," he whispers, with tears threatening to fall down his face. We stand there locked together for just a moment, not out of guilt, or obligation, but just because we're brothers, and we need to act like it, even if just for a second. It's what _she _would have wanted.

**As Always Please Read and Review**


	35. Chapter 35

**This chapter took so, so long to write, and it is the longest one that I have ever written. So if it's not too much trouble, please leave a quick review to tell me what you think. This is the second to last chapter. The last chapter will be sort of an epilogue told from Future Elena's POV, so you will finally figure out what happened to her after she died. I hope you all enjoy. **

Current Elena's POV

The sight of Damon and Stefan wrapped tightly in a brotherly embrace brings an entirely different type of tear to my eyes. It is a small blessing to know at least something good can come from this tragedy. They both awkwardly pull away from what is likely their first hug in at least a century. Neither one knows what to say, and both appear weighed down by their grief and guilt over my future self's passing. While I hate to interrupt the moment, a pressing question is still troubling me.

"Where is everyone else?" I ask concerned that Stefan is here all alone. "Last I heard you were the official chaperone on a forced family vacation."

Stefan glances back at me and wipes the tears from his eyes. "They're fine," he assures me. "I made sure they all were safely secured at the boardinghouse before I left. Only problem is that the compulsion is still in effect, so they won't stop bugging us about leaving town. Caroline and Katherine are watching them now, but they need Damon's command for the compulsion to break." I breathe a sigh of relief that no one else is still in jeopardy, though I don't know how I feel about Katherine being in charge of my loved ones. It's sort of like leaving a pyromaniac alone with matches. I try to reassure myself that Stefan wouldn't have left if he felt there was any danger, but I want to hurry back all the same.

Without my noticing, Damon digs his phone out of his pocket and dials Ric's number. "Put me on speakerphone," Damon commands, without so much as a hello. After a second, Damon speaks calmly into the receiver, carefully uttering every word to make sure he is heard. "Listen closely Gilbert loved ones. You are no longer required to leave town. Matt and Tyler, you will not remember any of this and you will go back to your regularly scheduled lives." He clicks end on his phone before Ric can say much, but I hear the beginnings of angry grumblings over the phone. "Problem solved," Damon claims before returning his phone to his pocket.

"Why did you only make Matt and Tyler forget," I question, confused that he wouldn't just take away everyone's memory to make things simpler. He stumbles over his words and his usual confident exterior is nowhere in sight.

"Elena, the other Elena," Damon begins with great difficulty. Talking about her so soon is obviously hard for him, but he soldiers on, and his voice gains strength as he speaks. "She wanted to keep them safe, but I know she hated to lie to them. She would want us to be honest about what happened. I only made Matt and Tyler forget, because I didn't think you wanted to drag them into this just yet."

His explanation breaks my heart. Even in the middle of one of the worst days of his life, he's still thinking about others, and trying to honor her memory and my wishes. "Thank you," I reply softly, just loud enough to be picked up by vampire hearing. He nods in recognition, but his eyes drift back to the spot, the spot where she died. I want so badly to leave this place, leave the memories of death and pain behind and never look back. Stefan must have the same idea, because without a word, he starts moving towards my car. I follow behind him, but only for a second, until I realize Damon is still standing there, unable or unwilling to move from that spot.

For all of Damon's experiences, this is one thing I understand better than he does, because I remember all too well what it feels like to lose a loved one in such a sudden way. After my parents died, I visited Wickery Bridge almost every day. No one understood why I would ever want to go back. Caroline thought I was being morbid, and Bonnie didn't know what to think, but one day Jenna joined me on that bridge, and she told me it was okay to let them go. It didn't mean that I didn't love them or that I would ever forget them. Leaving them behind just meant that I wanted to honor their memory by doing what they couldn't, living.

Some heartfelt speech about letting go isn't the type of thing likely to reach someone as jaded as Damon, so I act on instinct and hold out my hand and make a quiet plea. "Please come home," I beg, "for me." Damon takes a moment to consider my request, and he hesitates for a fraction of a second before taking my hand and walking silently back to the car. Stefan doesn't say a word or even shoot us a jealous glare. Whatever anger he felt at us both seems to have died when she did. In the course of one week, my future self taught all of us about what mattered in the end and what didn't

Once we arrive at the boardinghouse, we are bombarded with questions from everyone. The only people not in attendance are Matt and Tyler, who presumably left once they were no longer compelled to leave town. The voices in the room just get louder and angrier as each person vents about how unfair it was to be compelled and have their free will taken away. None of them know what happened yet, and instead of firing back in defense of Damon and my future self, I freeze up, unsure of how to tell everyone that my future self died today.

"Stop," Damon shouts at the top of his lungs, immediately silencing the room. If he were human, I'm sure he would be positively red-faced and seething. His anger emanates from deep inside of him, and I can hear it in every syllable. "I know that you're pissed off," Damon acknowledges, with more than a hint of irritation. "Maybe you're even looking for someone to blame. But right now, I officially don't care," Damon states without emotion or hesitation, as he stares coldly into everyone's eyes.

Half a dozen eyes are staring back at Damon in a state of shock. Some are angry at his dismissive attitude, and some are just surprised, but no one speaks a word as Damon continues talking without interruption. "Elena asked me to compel you all to protect you," Damon reminds them, as a few people hang their heads in shame. "She helped kill the man who cost you all your lives, and in doing so she lost her own."

It only took a microsecond for it to become so deathly quiet in that room that you could almost hear everyone's breathing. Pity, sadness, and shame coat everyone's faces as they process this news in their own way. Damon allows for a brief moment of reflection before speaking again.

"She died a hero," Damon proclaims solemnly. "She died protecting all of you, and I will not stand for anyone questioning her methods in how she did it. You want to demonize me, fine, I can handle it, but anyone here who speaks ill of the dead, answers to me," Damon states with a mild threat in his tone. He races upstairs before any of us remembers how to speak again. After a moment, I follow after him.

I push open his door only to see him with a liquor bottle already in hand, practically chugging it down, gulp after gulp. "I don't know if you've noticed, but I've had a rather impressive string of bad luck," Damon remarks sarcastically. "So for the sake of your own safety, why don't you keep a good ten feet minimum away from me, or better yet just leave me alone."

"No," I reply simply.

"No," Damon mimics back incredulously. "What makes you think I won't forcibly remove you from this room?" He asks, practically daring me to call his bluff.

"Because you don't really want me to leave," I answer honestly, while taking a seat on his bed. "It might be a cliché, but I do actually know what you're going through. I can help you, if you would just stop being so damn stubborn and let me."

Damon takes another swig of his bourbon and keeps his eyes glued in a forward direction, as if he is afraid of what happens once he looks back at me. "It's not safe for you to stay, so if you're smart you'll leave," he orders, as if he actually believes I'll listen.

"I've been accused of being a lot of things in my time, but smart was never one of them," I respond half-jokingly. "Whether you like it or not, I care about you, and I'm not leaving," I argue defiantly.

"Now might be a really good time to develop some self-preservational instincts, because it doesn't end well for the people who care about me. All you need to do is look at my stellar track record. I've failed everyone who ever made the mistake of loving me or trusting me," Damon remarks bitterly, with hopelessness in his eyes.

"That isn't true," I dispute vehemently.

He scoffs at my defense of him. "Yes it is," he replies. "Even my own father saw the mistake in trusting me. I was such a disappointment that he actually killed me, with his own gun," Damon adds in with fake amusement at the awful irony. "It's not like the rest of my family fared much better," Damon claims regretfully. "Just look at my baby bro. He idolized me, followed me around like a damn puppy dog when we were little, but he makes one mistake, and I cast him aside. My little brother, _who I was responsible for_, became a ripper, and I was too caught up in my own pain and hatred to stop him, to save him," Damon recounts, lost in years of regret and pain, struggling with issues I never even knew that he had.

"And then there's you," he says, while gesturing in my direction, "or at least future you. I promised her that I wouldn't let anything happen to her, and she died today, so don't lie to me and say that I didn't fail her, that I didn't fail them," He replies as his voice raises several levels, even though I know he isn't really mad at me, just himself.

"It's not a lie," I rebut calmly. "You didn't fail your father. _He_ failed _you_. Anyone who couldn't love you and accept you just as you are, isn't worthy of you," I claim, as I take his hand in mine to prove the point. "The love between a parent and a child should be unconditional, but your father never understood what it meant to truly love anyone. If he did, he never would have shot you that night."

I'm not sure whether he actually believes me, but I can tell that he wants to. "As for Stefan, you are not your brother's keeper," I promise him, all the while understanding the sense of obligation to protect a younger sibling. "If he can't feel guilt for your sins, then you can't feel guilt for his."

I take my finger and place it under Damon's cheek to lift up his gaze until our eyes are locked. "This part is important, so you pay attention. If there is one thing that you cannot blame yourself for, it is what happened to _her_ today. She would have died whether either of us was there or not," I reason logically.

Damon just stares back at me puzzled by my assertion, since he hadn't put two and two together yet. "I know you're trying to cheer me up, but I think it's safe to say, if I'd been there to feed Future Elena my blood, she would still be alive."

"No she wouldn't," I contradict him assuredly. "Her body only faded away _after_ Klaus was dead. That was the moment when her timeline was shifted irrevocably. She had changed too much, and that is when she faded away. We misunderstood the witches' intent; they never meant to save her. No matter what we did, Future Elena was always going to die. That was the deal that she made, and the witches held her to it. None of this was your fault," I promise him.

He's never looked more human or more lost than he does right now. "Then why?" He asks in a helpless voice that sounds nothing like the man that I thought I knew. "If she was doomed from the beginning, why give us hope? What did that spell even achieve?" Damon asks question after question that no one can really answer.

"I don't know," I admit uncertainly. "All I know is that I have faith that she's alright. It's just a feeling, and maybe it's irrational, but I truly believe wherever she is, whatever has happened to her, she is exactly where she is supposed to be," I theorize, probably sounding crazier by the second.

"I want to believe that," Damon confesses uneasily.

"Then do, have a little faith. All that faith is, is what we choose to believe, what we hope is true, so you can choose to believe that she's in a better place. I don't know about you, but I need that comfort," I state with a weak smile.

Damon nods and doesn't say anything for a moment, but something is still clearly troubling him. "Did she say anything before she died," Damon asks, curiously.

It's my turn to grow uncharacteristically silent. Her last moments were tragically beautiful and heartfelt, but I worried that they would only make Damon feel worse. Still uncertain of whether it was the right thing to do, I decide to tell him the truth, because I had promised her. Who was I to deny someone their last request?

"She spoke of how much she loved you," I answer honestly. "She said that you were the love of her life." I pause briefly before adding, "And you are the love of mine."

Damon is shocked for a brief second by my admission, and I grow very nervous when he doesn't say anything. I start rambling like an idiot and talking very quickly. "I know this is the worst possible time to bring this up, but she made me promise that I wouldn't be afraid anymore, and that I would tell you how much I loved you every day for the rest of our lives. So consider this day one." My nervousness vanishes when I see the goofy confused look on Damon's face. It makes it impossible not to smile. I reach up to caress his face with my hand and I speak from my heart.

"Of all the things that I am grateful for in this life, for all that my future self gave me, the thing I am most grateful for is you," I admit genuinely. "She helped me find you, even when I didn't know that I needed you. I can't promise that it will be easy. I'm stubborn and emotional and occasionally really selfish, but I think that I could love you better than anyone else in this world. That much I can promise you. The future's been rewritten, so there's no telling what it holds for you and me, but when I think about who I want at my side when the unknown comes, all I see is you."

Damon gazes in disbelief at what I've just said. While he can't find an answer with his words, his hands obviously have already made a decision. He is gripping me tighter, not enough to hurt, but just enough to be sure I'm not going anywhere. Once he finally finds some words to express himself, I can't help but notice the hope renewed in his voice. "Just to double check, am I allowed to kiss you now?" I nod happily at a rapid pace.

"Thank God," he jokes before connecting his lips with mine. This kiss is different from our one at the carnival and our one at my house. It isn't just about wanting him. This kiss is about how much I need him. I need his lips on me to remind me that I lived today, that my family lived, that in the face of overwhelming sadness, we can still be okay. We can still survive this.

Just as Damon is about to rid me of my shirt, we both hear someone loudly clearing their throat at the door. Before I even look up, I want to kill whoever it is. Caroline is standing there with an embarrassed smile on her face, and he waves awkwardly at us as we disentangle ourselves from the compromising position that she found us in.

Damon collapses back on the bed and remarks, "Seriously, can I never catch a break?" He seems to call out this question to the universe, but he never gets his answer.

"Sorry to interrupt," Caroline states, far too amused by all this. "You're going to want to come downstairs."

We both readjust ourselves before descending down the stairs only to see the entire living room has been covered in candles and everyone is gathered around, even Katherine, with Stefan standing at her side.

"Great, blondie has invited us to a virginal sacrifice," Damon jokes. "I assume you invited some special guests, because I am certain none of you girls qualify, especially you," Damon quips while pointing towards Katherine. I playfully step on his foot to shut him up.

"What is all this?" I ask, confused by the sudden need for candles.

"It's a wake," Caroline replies excitedly. "It was Stefan's idea."

Today just seems full of surprises. His mood swings are giving me whiplash. This one at least I like. Stefan steps forward and addresses me sadly. "A version of you died today, and I figured we all needed to say goodbye." I smile appreciatively back at him, and he offers me a glass of champagne. "Everyone raise your glasses for a toast in remembrance of the life of Future Elena Gilbert."

We all raise our glasses and take a sip as I whisper to Damon. "I feel a lot like Tom Sawyer crashing my own funeral."

He laughs a little at the reference. "This might shock you, but I think baby bro is right on this one. We all need some closure, so just enjoy it while we all talk about how awesome you are," Damon teases me with a smile.

Everyone is gathered in a misshapen oval, and Stefan is situated towards the front. He taps his glass to get our attention. "Since this is a wake, I figured we should try and say a few words. So with your permission, I was hoping I could go first."

I was surprised that he wanted to speak at all. It's not like they were ever on the best of terms, but guilt can do amazing things to a person's perspective. With Stefan, you never can tell if the effect will be positive or negative. But for now at least, I can see the old Stefan shining through, the one capable of noble actions and sincere sentiments. While I know the two of us will never be together again, I now have hopes that we might be able to be friends one day, which will make it much easier if Damon and Stefan ever hope to be brothers again. His words go a long way towards healing whatever hurt feelings I might be harboring towards him, and I can't help but smile throughout his toast.

"In her short time here with us," Stefan begins, "we didn't always see eye to eye. She wanted me to accept things that I wasn't ready to face. It led to a lot of fights and a lot of harsh words I wish I could take back, but in the midst of all of it, she taught me that everything happens for a reason, even the things that hurt. She was strong, and brave, and true. She never let her experiences break her and she cared more about the people in this room than she ever did for herself. She truly was the best of us all."

We all drink another sip of champagne to the beautiful sentiment that Stefan shared. And almost immediately, the next toast begins when Caroline taps her glass lightly. "I'm not good at speeches," Caroline starts with her typical mix of insecure confidence. "But here is what I do know. Elena Gilbert is one of my best friends, past, present, and future, that will never change. I can only hope that I was as good a friend to her in her last days, as she has always been to me."

I clink my own glass to get everyone's attention. "Before I start wildly hugging all of you for being so amazing," I begin with a smile, "I just wanted to say how thankful I am that my future self got to spend more time with all of you, because each one of you is so precious to me, and I can't imagine ever living without you. And since I consider myself uniquely qualified to speak for her, I need you to know that she loved you all very much. Even though my future self might have met a tragic end, she lived a life of purpose. She saved the people that I love most and that is a gift that I can never repay. I only hope I can live up to the example that she set for me. I love you all, and so to our fallen friend, may she rest in peace," I toast while raising a glass, hoping somewhere out there, she knows how appreciative I am for her sacrifice.

We spend the rest of night reminiscing with old stories, some are about Future Elena's antics when she first got here, and some are just stories to pass the time. Once the alcohol is gone, and the last person has grown weary for sleep, Damon and I call it a night as we walk hand in hand up the stairs. I grab one of Damon's shirts from his dresser and I crawl in next to him. My head rests gently on his chest, and Damon stubbornly refuses to sleep until I do, because after today, he just needs to hear me keep breathing. We both eventually fall asleep in each other's arms, content that the rest will come. We will have nights filled with passionate sex and fiery kisses, but for now, we are just happy to have found our way to each other at last.

**As Always Please Read and Review**


	36. Chapter 36

**Okay, so I totally said this would be the last chapter, but then the epilogue got really, really long, so I decided to break it up into two chapters. In the first one, I will answer what that pesky spell is about, and in the next one, it will be more like the real epilogue with a sort of retrospective of Elena's life and what happens now. I hope you all enjoy.**

Future Elena's POV

_Previously on: _

_When I open my eyes again, there is a near blinding light that seems to come from everywhere and nowhere. There is nothing around but vast emptiness wherever I look, except for a familiar face gazing back at me with a smile. _

_ "Miss Sheila," I speak in disbelief, unsure as to what is happening. _

_ "Hello, child," she addresses me, like she did when I was little and playing over at her house. "We have much to talk about and important decisions to make, so we better get started."_

She doesn't stop to chat, doesn't even turn around to see if I am following her, she just starts walking away, apparently expecting me just trail after her. I catch up to her easily, and pull gently on her arm until she is facing me.

"Wait just a minute, hold the phone," I ask exasperated. "You can't just show up here and play the whole cryptic ghost card and expect me to follow you into oblivion. If you want me to go with you, I need to know what's going on."

Miss Sheila's expression is one of great amusement, like there is some inside joke that I will never understand.

"He said you'd be stubborn about this," she replies teasingly.

"He, who he?" I question, more confused by the second. "Is it God? Are you talking about God?"

This time Miss Sheila can't hold in a small giggle that I wouldn't expect from someone as old as Bonnie's Grams, but apparently the unknown hilarity continues.

"Not quite," she answers, still obviously finding humor in my frustration. "I'm afraid there is only so much that I'm allowed to tell you, special rules and all."

At this point, I start pacing back and forth across the endless expanse of whiteness that never seems to stop or start anywhere. My aggravation level is through the roof and my tone betrays my mood.

"You're a witch and we're both ghosts, and you want to lecture me about rules," I respond while pointing out just one more of life's little ironies. Miss Sheila doesn't appear to take offense to my attitude, but instead chooses to ignore it.

"Life," she explains, "even the afterlife has rules, just like everything else. There needs to be balance, structure, or else everything falls apart. You can call me old fashioned if you like, but even in death, we must strive for order." Her explanation while all wise and reasonable sounding doesn't really answer my original question.

"Oh, fun," I reply sarcastically, "more cryptic messages about life and from a ghost no less. Just what I was hoping for when I asked you to elaborate further."

Obviously eternity has driven Bonnie's Grams a little nutty, because I hear the beginnings of a chuckle in her throat.

"And we're back to the laughing," I notice, increasingly annoyed.

"It just surprises me sometimes," she clarifies. "As much as you've changed, you're still that same four year old girl who stubbornly refused to wear a dress to your birthday party."

The wave of nostalgia takes me back to a simpler time, when my biggest concern was looking like a girly girl in front of Matt. "I can't believe you even remember that," I whisper softly.

"The sight of you taking your dress and throwing it in the mud is hard to forget," she reminds me, with a hint of mockery in her voice.

"I haven't felt like that girl for a long time," I state with a bit of regret.

"That might be true, but she's still there, somewhere deep inside," Miss Sheila reassures me. "It's easy to think that we leave our past selves behind when we grow up, but they're still a part of us. I've watched you all this time. I've watched you struggle and hurt and I've watched you survive against unimaginable circumstances. Some days you've acted with a maturity far beyond your years, and some days you remind me of that little girl too willful to listen to the people around you, but your strength is one thing I've always admired about you."

Her buttering me up makes me feel pretty lousy about yelling at her. Today, I definitely became in touch with my inner child.

"I suppose you think I'm acting like a brat?" I question, ashamed at my behavior. Miss Sheila's eyes soften and she smiles back at me with love.

"I think you're acting exactly like you deserve to act in this moment," she assures me. "Death, especially a sudden one, can prove rather jarring."

So to summarize, I was acting like a brat, but I died today, so it's alright. Good to know. I try to suppress that childish side that made a sudden reappearance, and attempt to bring forth that maturity that I know I'm capable of.

"So putting aside my childish tantrum, will you please just tell me what's going on?" I ask in a pleading voice. All I need is a few answers, because this whole dying thing has thus far not come with a manual.

"What's going on is that your life, your death, it presents a unique set of problems that the servants of nature have never faced before," Miss Sheila explains delicately, as if she is afraid to give too much away. "The other witches, we fought about what to do with you from the very beginning. We set you on the path to open Esther's coffin, but we never imagined that it would end with such bloodshed. We had to make it right, and that's why we transported you to the past. But even after we sent you back, it seemed too cruel to just let you die before you even had a chance to live."

"That's kind of a moot point, seeing as how I'm already dead," I state, with an uncertainty as to where this is going.

"Perhaps," Miss Sheila concedes, "but that doesn't mean that you can't at least experience what it means to live." And we're back to the cryptic messages that I love so much.

"You lost me again," I tell her, trapped in my confusion.

"The spell, the one we had Bonnie perform, it linked your past self's emotions with your own."

"Yeah, and what a barrel of laughs that was," I derisively reminisce. "I spent my last 24 hours on Earth fighting with Damon and with my past self, only to die the next day."

"Your death was predestined," she reminds me unflinchingly. "That was the deal that you made, but we hoped that the spell could give you a second chance."

"To what?" I ask, growing frustrated once more.

"To feel."

"For a day," I respond with bitterness in my voice, "how useful is that?"

Miss Sheila studies me for a moment before replying. "You still haven't figured it out, have you?"

"Let's assume that I am incredibly slow and you can explain it to me," I reply, dripping with sarcasm.

"What do you feel right now, this second?" She questions me inquisitively.

"I feel frustrated and confused," I admit, "mostly at you."

"That's not all is it? What else do you feel?" I search deep within myself to answer her question, because in the midst of dying, I haven't had a whole lot of time to sort out my emotions

"Sad, and lost," I reply, confused by my own answer. "There's like this emptiness inside of me."

"Have you ever felt that way before?" She prods gently.

"The emptiness and the sense of loss, too many times to count," I respond mournfully, still unsure as to where she is going with all of this. "It feels like I'm . . . grieving," I state, and the epiphany comes flying in. "I can still feel her can't I? My past self's emotion, the connection isn't broken. But why, why keep me connected to her even after my death?"

"We can't give you your life back," Miss Sheila informs me gloomily, "but we can, for a little while at least, let you live through hers. That's where I was taking you, to a special place where you can watch over your loved ones."

"So it's like heaven?" I ask with all the innocence of a child.

"I find its best not to ask too many questions," she advises me warmly. "All you need to know is that you have a choice. You can choose to watch over your past self's life, feel what she feels, or you can let go and move on to the afterlife that you were meant for," Miss Sheila finishes outlining my options.

"What will happen to me in this afterlife?"

Despite all the stories that I heard in Bible study when I was a child, I really don't know what awaits me on the other side.

"I'm afraid I can't tell you that," she responds regretfully.

"More rules?" I guess, with a touch of annoyance.

"Always," she replies with a half-smile, "but just so you know, if you do choose to stay and watch, it doesn't have to be forever. You can move on whenever you like. All you need to do is call for me, and I will be at your side instantly. The choice is up to you."

I never was very good at making decisions, especially in a time sensitive situation. My mother used to tell me that I always made the right decision, once I was done exhausting all the wrong ones. I don't know if I'm making another mistake, but at least it's not forever. My uncertainly and fear echoes in my voice.

"I . . . I need to know that they'll be okay," I rationalize convincingly. "I just need to watch for a little while," I promise to Miss Sheila and myself. A few days, maybe a few weeks, then I'll be able to move on. Miss Sheila smiles at me sadly, for some reason unhappy with my reply.

"As you wish child," she states before slowly disappearing before my eyes. Suddenly the scene changes, and as I look around, my surroundings are different. There is still the endless expanse of white nothingness, but there is also a screen, that looks oddly similar to a TV set. I am mesmerized by the images flashing across it. I see myself and Damon and Stefan walking into the boardinghouse. I witness Damon defend my honor, drown his sorrows in bourbon, and claim that he failed me. I want to reach out and hold him myself, pull him in my arms and never let go, but I can't. That is the one limitation of this situation, I can't call the shots. I have to trust my past self to make the right choices.

The only comfort that I draw is that I can feel the touch of Damon's skin when my past self grabs his hand. I can feel the trepidation as she confesses her love for the first time, and I can feel his lips on mine as we make out before Caroline so rudely interrupts. I tear up at the toasts celebrating my life, and I'm filled with such love that I'm certain I will burst. After a couple of days, the moments happen almost in a blur. Time must move faster here, because what is hours back on Earth, feels like only a few seconds, where I am now. That is my only excuse for staying so long, for watching so long. In the back of my mind, I know that I should leave, I've seen all that I need to know that my loved ones will be alright, but I can't bring myself to turn away, so I resign myself to watching, before I know it five years have passed.

**As Always Please Read and Review**


	37. Chapter 37

**I cannot believe that this story is over. It took four months and more hours than you can imagine working on this. I was so inspired by some of the reviews that I got for the last chapter that I needed to finish this story, so I stayed up late to post this. **

**I want to give a truly heartfelt thank you to everyone who has read, alerted, favorited, and reviewed this story. There are so many of you whose kind words were sometimes the only thing pushing me to finish this at all. I do humbly ask that you review this last chapter, even if you've never written a review for this story before. I love hearing what you guys think, and your opinions whether positive or negative make me a better writer. I hope you all enjoy.**

Future Elena's POV

It's hard to sum up the life that I watched my past self live. Where would I even start? Five years is a lot of ground to cover. I could talk about the feeling of elation and pride that I felt every time she told Damon she loved him, or the light that glowed from his face at the words. I could speak of the nights they spent going on whatever outrageous dates that Damon could think of, just so life would never be boring. Or I could even talk about how my friends and family evolved and grew over the years, but after much thought, I've realized I can sum up those five years into ten moments. Ten perfect moments that finally gave me the strength to let go.

The first moment happened only a week after my death. Damon decided that we were all far too depressing and that I needed a much needed break from the doom and gloom, so he asked me to put on something pretty and not ask any questions. He never told me where we were going; all he would say is that this would be our first official date. He even went so far as to blind fold me to preserve the surprise. It wasn't until I was sitting on a private plane on the tarmac that Damon finally fessed up. He was taking me to Paris for our first date, because why not? I'd never been to Paris.

While it was certainly the longest date of my life, 12 hour flight each way was no picnic, Damon made every second entertaining. He dared me that I couldn't think of enough life stories to fill the 12 hour flight. Personally, I think he just wanted to learn more about me, not that he'd ever admit to it. On the flight back, I dared him to do the same, and his were far more entertaining. Imagine listening to Damon describe the roaring 20s or the hippie movement. As beautiful and perfect as it was having dinner in a fancy French restaurant and walking down the Champs-Élysées at night, my favorite part of the date were his endless stream of stories. He was just himself, without the hang ups or the insecurities. Damon just wanted me to see him, exactly as he was, and I'd never loved him more.

The next moment came swiftly after. It was the first night that we spent together. While I probably would have jumped him halfway through the plan ride back from our first date, Damon insisted on being a gentleman. Because I clearly chose Damon for his manners. I felt my past self's emotions like they were my own, so when she felt like she was dying to rip Damon's clothes off his chest, so was I, so goody for me.

After nearly a week of being gentlemanly, I was going insane. So late one night, I snuck into his room, like he had done so many times to me, and I stripped off all my clothes and climbed into bed with him. Why not be bold while dating someone like Damon? The surprised look on his face made it all worth it. Damon forgot all about his gentlemanly streak once I was sitting on top of him naked. It wasn't until right before dawn that both of us were too exhausted to continue our marathon session of sex, teasing, and even cuddling. I finally got an answer to my question. Yes, Damon was really that good. I fell asleep in his arms feeling safer than I ever remembered being since my parents died.

The next joyous moment had nothing to do with me or with Damon. It came when Damon dropped me off after school and he came inside to watch me study, a.k.a. distracting me from studying. When we entered the house, we could hear the sounds of laughter coming from the kitchen and I saw my aunt with a decent sized engagement ring on her finger. Alaric was getting married again. He and Jenna were going to live happily ever after, like they were always supposed to. I was the maid of honor at their wedding and Damon was his best man.

Love must have been in the air that year, because within two weeks, Tyler and Caroline announced that they were a couple. Apparently unbeknownst to any of us, they had grown closer after her breakup with Matt, and they were ready to take their relationship public. I was happy to see that they had still found their way to each other, even without the werewolf curse to bring them together.

The next epic moment belonged to Damon and I, and it will always rank as one of the most romantic nights of my life. For weeks, Damon was acting secretive and jittery. Neither I nor my past self could figure it out, but on our three year anniversary. Damon took me to a fancy French restaurant that he said reminded him of where we had our first date. He rented out a boat and had the captain drive us out to the middle of the lake. If it was anyone else, I would have thought he brought me out here to dump my body. He started playing with my hair, which he only did when he was nervous about something. I whisper in his ear to calm his nerves, "You know you can tell me anything."

He smiles back at me as replies simply, "I know, that's why I want to marry you." At this point, he kneels down on one knee, claiming this was the proper way to propose. He swore that he would love me forever, which for a vampire was really saying something. He asks for the honor of becoming my husband, and I would have come back to haunt my past self from beyond the grave if she had said no. Luckily for both our sanities, she answered yes immediately, as happy tears ran down her face, while he placed the ring on her finger.

It was no surprise that my next momentous day was when I declared in front of family, friends, and God to honor and cherish Damon for all the days of my life. Our wedding day was perfect in its imperfections, just like us. Caroline lost the rings, Stefan's tux got a large tear down the side, and my own brother was an hour late. But it was absolutely worth all the drama to see Damon running around like a chicken with his head cut off, as if I was going to change my mind if I didn't have the perfect wedding. When I finally walked down the aisle and caught Damon's eyes for the first time, he looked breathless and in awe. I felt like a princess, and I was never happier to have at least one human moment where I got to be just like everybody else.

Life was pretty quiet for a while after that. With no real supernatural threats, thanks to Elijah, the residents of Mystic Falls were able to just live their lives in peace. Every few weeks, Elijah would stop by and update me on the supernatural visitors that he 'redirected,' as he phrased it, to other locations. Deep down, I couldn't help but wonder if he just wanted time to talk with me. His siblings provided him with company enough, but the memory of our early bond kept drawing him back to Mystic Falls. Over the years, my past self grew fond of his company and his visits. Damon even came to tolerate him; once Elijah made it clear he had no intention of harming me or trying to steal me away from him. There were times I almost could see them becoming friends.

As good as life was living in newly wedded bliss, things got even better when I got a hysterically happy phone call from Jenna telling me she was pregnant. Alaric was beaming like a proud father for weeks after the announcement. When the babies came, babies as in twins, which Ric conveniently forgot to mention ran in his family, we all rushed to the hospital to welcome the new additions. The most precious sight of all was Damon holding little baby Grayson as I held little baby Miranda. We both knew this was the closest that we would ever come to having children of our own, and we took to it instantly. They named Damon and I Godparents to the twins, and that gave Damon the perfect excuse to babysit while still holding on to his bad boy image. The sight of Damon making funny faces to Grayson and his careful rocking of Miranda was enough to make even the most cynical person believe in the humanity again, because I could see it, in its purest form, in Damon's eyes.

I didn't have to wait long for another perfect moment, because we seemed to be making them on a daily basis. However the sight of Stefan and Katherine making out on the couch like two horny teenagers definitely makes it on the top ten. My past self starts laughing uncontrollably at the embarrassed look on Stefan's face after he is caught. Damon seems pretty pleased with himself as well at the moment, mostly because he had called it weeks ago, saying that the two were growing closer, and more than once he had caught them in what he called was their star crossed lover's gaze. My past self found the situation so hilarious she couldn't help herself from commenting. "Since my future self isn't here to say it," she begins with a wide smile across her face, "I would like to say on her behalf. I told you so." The sense of satisfaction that I was right about those two was definitely worth all the crap that Stefan put me through while I was alive. The blush on his cheeks at my gentle teasing didn't hurt either.

After that, I took pity on Stefan and invited them both out for drink at the grill. The sight of us all laughing together, throwing darts, and playing pool, while Katherine and I occasionally teamed up against the boys to mock them mercilessly, was a sight for sore eyes. For the first time, I could see her future, the four of them together for the rest of eternity. My past self must have thought the same thing, because that very same night, as she was lying in Damon's arms, she asked him to turn her.

This sparked days of debate, uncertainty, and eventual acceptance on Damon's part. He never chose this life for himself, and he would never wish it on anyone. The one argument that finally gets through is when I bring up what he told me on his death bed all those years ago. Damon said becoming a vampire was worth it, because he got to meet me. I did my best to help him understand that an eternity of bloodlust was a fair trade for an eternity of life with him. Once he agreed, I knew it was time to go. Everyone I knew and loved was happy and safe. I was confident that they would stay that way. No amount of rationalizations can hold me here any longer, so I call out for Miss Sheila, and she appears instantly.

"I understand that you're ready now," she replies, as if she has spent the last five years waiting for my call.

"I think I am," I answer uncertainly, "but how could I ever know? You're asking me to let go of the only life that I ever knew to become what exactly?" She smiles knowingly back at me.

"I thought you might need some convincing, so I brought along a little help," she responds mysteriously. A flash of light comes and standing before me is Damon, my Damon. He's still wearing the same clothes that he had on from the night that he died, but he wasn't gray or lifeless. He was just standing there, looking at me with his classic smirk in place, like he had been waiting all along.

"You're telling me little Miss Vampire Slayer herself, who took down an Original, is afraid of the great beyond?" Damon mocks with his typical sarcasm. "I've done this whole dying thing twice already. Trust me, you're being a little melodramatic."

Without thought, I launch myself into his arms. I pepper kisses all over his face. If I were wearing lipstick, Damon would probably resemble a clown given my attack of on his face with my mouth. I start on his lips and then work my way to his jaw, repeating over and over again, "I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry."

He reluctantly pulls away, but still keeps in constant contact, with his hand on the small of my back. Damon places a hand on my lips and speaks softly. "You gave up a chance at a mortal life so that you could save mine. I'd say we're pretty much even." Just like that I'm forgiven, for rejecting him, for not choosing him sooner, and for not making him feel worthy of my love. We don't need elaborate apologies, because we're together now, and nothing else matters.

"We've both made mistakes, and I never need another apology from you again. Although I will say, how many days in the life of Elena Gilbert did you really need to see before letting go?" He remarks casually, half-joking and half-serious. "You have no idea how boring eternity has been up here without you. We don't even get cable," he informs me, as if such a thought is preposterous.

"We?" I inquire hopefully. Damon smiles real wide and I can't help but mirror his actions.

"Another bone that I have to pick with our eternal cruise director," Damon directs his complaint to Sheila, who has been standing at a respectable distance since I attacked Damon with my face. "I've been stuck here with all your friends and my insufferable brother who cannot stop apologizing. I get it, you feel bad about quasi killing us all. It's time to move on man. The moping and the hair shaping really starts to wear thin after a while." I laugh at Damon's feigned dislike of his brother. After watching five years of brotherly bonding, I know he's full of it, but I enjoy watching his fierce denial. As I'm reveling in the moment, a question troubles me.

"But Stefan didn't die, not even in the future," I point out, perplexed as how Stefan could even be here. Damon's face grows serious, and he starts to scare me.

"Yes, he did, they all did," Damon states gravely. "Once you killed Klaus, you weren't the only one who faded away. Caroline, Stefan, Katherine, and all the other people who were affected by Klaus' death, they all disappeared too, because their futures were altered forever just like yours." I feel like I've been kicked in the gut. Derailing my life was one thing, but I never agreed to change theirs.

"Why didn't anybody tell me that would happen?" I question despairingly. "I didn't just sacrifice my life. I sacrificed theirs." Damon holds me tighter and rubs my back in comfort.

"The witches were afraid it might impact your decision," he informs me. "That's the witching community for you, always thinking they know what's best. They work in mysterious ways, ours is not to reason why."

Damon stiffens in my arms and starts screaming just for a moment as he grabs his head in agony. Miss Sheila apparently took great offense to Damon's insult of her ancestors. Once Damon's head feels like it is no longer exploding, he glares at Sheila.

"Really, still?" He questions aggravated. A part of me is angry at her for hurting him, but the other part remembers that she might still hold a grudge for the whole tomb opening, death thing.

"You should count yourself lucky she even let you in to this little after life of ours," I remind him, curious as to whom he had to bribe to secure that deal.

"I was pretty surprised myself," Damon answers with a confident smile, "but grandma witch mentioned something about a stellar character reference, apparently judgey has a soft spot for me." Bonnie, Bonnie Bennett convinced her Grams to let Damon have a peaceful eternity with me. If there are still such things as birthdays once you are dead, I will need to get her like a kick ass present, like maybe a small island.

A million thoughts keep popping up in my mind. While I want to race towards eternity with Damon, I still have so many questions. "So when I move on, I'll see them all again?" My hope, that was once such a tiny flicker of light, is now a fiery inferno, but I'm afraid of it getting snuffed out. Damon calms my worries and fears with the sound of his voice alone.

"You'll see whoever you want to see," he promises wholeheartedly. "This is your afterlife. You decide what to make of it."

"So is this real, are you real," I ask in disbelief, "or are you just some figment of my imagination that I'm making up in my head?"

"I find its best not to ask too many questions," Damon answers jokingly. "Theology, religion, what does it matter in the end? I'm here and you're here. That's good enough for me." He really has the best answers, and I respond with a lingering kiss that is only interrupted when Miss Sheila clears her throat. Even dead, Damon and I can't seem to catch a break.

"That's enough for me too," I vow to him. "That's enough till the end of time. In case you haven't figured it out yet, I love you," I confess, more honest than I've ever been. "I've imagined telling you that a thousand times," I admit shyly, alluding to all the nights I spent dreaming about finding him again, saving him. Thus far, the reality is even better than the dream. Damon grins and gazes at me in almost childlike wonder.

"In this little fantasy of yours, how do I respond to your little heartfelt confession?" Damon asks cockily.

"Oh, you know some sappy music plays, you tell me you love me too, followed by kissing," I reply casually, like I'm not bearing my soul and my deepest desires.

"I don't know what I can do about our music options, but I'm happy to oblige with the rest," Damon generously offers, before cradling my cheek in the palm of his hand. He caresses my face, and I shiver at his touch, even in death, he makes me feel alive. He stares deeply into my eyes, and I could care less that Miss Sheila is still standing like ten feet away. A herd of bison couldn't divert my attention from this moment. "Elena Gilbert," Damon starts after a second's hesitation at the prospect of saying those three words to me once more. "I love you, back then, now, and for all of time. I love you, forever." This was the moment, the one we never got to have, and it isn't with some past version of Damon, and it isn't through some vicarious feeling. This is just us. This moment is ours, and for once, I know exactly what to say.

"I love you too," I confess freely, "which you know we already covered, but I thought you deserved to hear it again," I ramble nervously, to Damon's complete amusement.

"Happy to hear it," Damon gently mocks with a smile, "because any other response would have been really embarrassing."

I laugh a little at his joke before desperately asking. "Can we skip to the kissing part?" Damon breathes a sigh of relief.

"I love the kissing part," he admits as he grabs for the back of my head. I swear if I wasn't already in heaven, this kiss would send me there. Facing down Klaus, dealing with moody versions of my past self and past Stefan, even dying, totally worth it to bring me here to this moment. When we finally pull away, there is a door that I swear wasn't there before. It is a standard, run of a mill door that you would see on anyone's house that happens to be standing up straight in the middle of the vast whiteness.

"This is our exit," Damon answers to my unspoken question, as he gently takes my hand. I have no idea what's behind that door or what new life I'm about to start, but feeling Damon at my side at last, I'm not afraid anymore. With him, I'm fearless, so we walk into the unknown, together, finally.

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**Congratulations LucklessRomance17 on guessing the ending like 5 chapters ago. **


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